


Seb's Journey

by matteahayn



Category: High School Musical: The Musical: The Series (TV)
Genre: Gay Disasters, M/M, Theater Kids, sarcastic ashlyn, seb and carlos text a lot, seb is always late, seb's supportive family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:14:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 46,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24500635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/matteahayn/pseuds/matteahayn
Summary: HSMTM:TS season 1 from Seb's perspective because he was robbed- lots more Seblos content.First chapter starts on the first day of school and the last chapter will be on show night : ) Chronicles their journey becoming friends and then something more.
Relationships: Seb Matthew-Smith/Carlos Rodriguez
Comments: 3
Kudos: 56





	1. Start of Something New (ep. 1)

September 3, 2019  
Seb took a deep breath as he stepped into the doors of East High School for his Sophomore Year. The loud chatters of voices and blasts of freezing air-conditioned air hit him as he walked down the hallway. It was a totally different atmosphere than that of his hot, lazy summer on his family’s Utah farm. A huge whiteboard stood at the junction to the athletic wing, pointing students to the gym for the mandatory start of the year assembly. Normally, Seb would have dreaded this, but he was really excited to find out what this year’s musical was because he had had a lot of fun in the ensemble of Brigadoon last year. He had found an unexpected voice last year through theater. Now that he was a sophomore, he had promised himself he wouldn’t be as afraid to be bold.  
The assembly was just starting as Seb slipped in. He squeezed in right next to Ashlyn, who greeted him with an awkward half-wave. They were sort of friends, but they hadn’t really talked over the summer. He had almost been late for the first day of school because he had so much to do around the farm in the mornings. He couldn’t help but yawn as Principal Guitterez droned on about attendance and baseball hats.  
Finally, he looked over at a youngish red-head lady sitting in the front row. “And now for a special introduction,” Seb’s ears perked up. “This year, East High has a new drama teacher with an announcement she swore in writing would not cost too much money.” She got up and slowly made her way to the podium. The gym was so quiet you could hear a pin drop. She was followed by Carlos, the school’s resident High School Musical historian. Seb’s heart skipped a beat. He had wanted to talk to Carlos all last year in their freshman English class, but he had always been too shy. That would hopefully change today.  
“Hold your applause,” the new drama teacher requested. To Seb’s shock, she pulled out a t-shirt launcher from beneath the podium and shot out a t-shirt into the crowd. It came flying right at Seb and hit the guy next to Ashlyn in the face. “Go Wildcats!” the lady shouted. At least she was enthusiastic. She grabbed the microphone and stepped away from the podium, creating a bunch of fuzzy feedback. Seb winced a little. “My name is Miss Jenn,” she said, “and when I heard that the high school where High School Musical was shot had never staged a production of High School Musical the Musical, I was shocked as an actress, inspired as a director, and triggered as a millennial.” There were sniggers throughout the crowd at that, but Seb only felt excitement. He had practiced the songs and dances to HSM relentlessly in his family’s barn since he could walk. This show meant everything to him. He looked over at Ashlyn and her eyes were wide with excitement too.  
“Auditions are tomorrow after school,” Miss Jenn continued. “This show could change your lives.” Seb supposed that was true. “And I’m saying this as a background dancer from the original movie. Third from the left, back row, red headband.” Seb was shocked at this. He’d have to look for her closely next time he watched! She went to continue but Carlos came up beside her and she cut herself off, linking her arms with his. Seb noticed that he was wearing a new olive green jacket.  
“Oh! And meet your new student choreographer, Carlos. You know him as captain of the color guard.” Carlos blushed and Seb smiled. He didn’t know Carlos had been on color guard, or that he was a dancer for that matter. This meant that he would get to work with Carlos if he got a part in the show! “I know him as an unpaid rising star,” Miss Jenn finished. Confusion muddled Carlos’s face and Seb couldn’t help but giggle. Ashlyn looked over at him suspiciously and he blushed. The bell rang loudly, breaking the moment, but it couldn’t erase the grin on his face as he followed the crush of students to his first-period class. 

Seb barely registered anything all morning. He was too consumed with thinking about the show and auditions the next day. He had a question burning within him and he finally got the chance to ask coming out of third-period choir to lunch. He saw a familiar dark head of hair in the crowd in front of him, and he rushed to catch up.  
“Carlos!” he said, tapping the boy’s shoulder. Carlos whipped around, a look of shock on his face. It slowly lifted into a smile.  
“Hey, Seb, right?” he asked, quirking his eyebrow. Seb’s chest pounded.  
“You know my name?” He asked timidly, and Carlos laughed kindly.  
“Of course! You were the only one in English class last year who didn’t laugh at my presentation on Shakespeare.” His face looked sad at that. Seb’s heart hurt a little to remember it. He didn’t understand why Carlos didn’t have any friends. He was such a funny and genuine guy.  
“I remember that,” Seb said gently. “I thought it was really cool!” Carlos looked skeptical at first but seemed to realize that the gleam in Seb’s eye wasn’t mocking.  
“Thanks, Seb, that’s really sweet.” The two boys smiled as they continued down the rapidly emptying halls. It would soon be just the two of them standing there. The boys felt the pressure to end the conversation soon, although both were enjoying it more than they expected.  
Carlos stopped in his tracks, realizing something. “Hey, are you auditioning tomorrow?” Seb nodded.  
“That’s what I came to you to talk about, actually. I have a crazy idea. If I tell you, do you promise you won’t laugh at me?”  
“I think we’ve established that I owe you that,” Carlos said as if he couldn’t believe Seb would expect that.  
“Well, I was thinking that maybe I could audition for Sharpay? If not I could just try for Ryan, its probably stupid anyways, I just-” He could feel himself starting to sink down against the lockers.  
Carlos cut him off, placing a hand on his shoulder. “I think that’s an amazing idea!” The choreographer’s big brown eyes lit up.  
“Really?” Seb asked. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but he sure didn’t expect that much enthusiasm.  
“Of course!” Carlos smiled. Just then, the bell clanged, signaling the start of the lunch period. Looking around and realizing they were alone, Carlos quickly took his arm from Seb’s shoulder. An awkward pause grew in the space between the boys.  
“Well, I really gotta go, but I’m excited to see your audition!” Carlos said. Seb smiled as he walked away, placing his hand where Carlos had touched his shoulder. 

Seb was relieved when he saw Natalie Badgley sitting at a table by herself in the middle of the lunchroom. He wasn’t sure if he was going to have any friends in his lunch period, but he and Natalie had bonded last year during Brigadoon because they had both been new to the drama program and overlooked.  
“Can I sit here?” he asked, approaching her.  
“Sure,” Natalie replied, surly. That was as good as a warm greeting from her. Seb had gotten used to her constant resting bitch face. He sat down next to her hesitantly. As he went to unzip his bag to take out his lunch, Natalie hissed in his ear. “Look over there at E.J. Caswell’s table. Drama at 9’o-clock.” Seb tilted his head without thinking towards the middle of the room. He knew the table well because the water polo team always made it a huge deal to place themselves in the middle of the cafeteria. He was shocked to see E.J.’s arm around Nini, the sweet girl who played the back of a cow two years ago in Gypsy. He would have never thought E.J. would have given someone like Nini the time of day. Then again, he really didn’t know anything about relationships.  
“I thought Nini was dating that skater boy. She wrote him a song and everything,” he replied. He remembered watching it on Instagram.  
Natalie shook her head vigorously. “Apparently, that backfired. E.J. and Nini went to drama camp together this summer when Nini and her boyfriend were on a break. Everyone’s been saying they’re going to be Troy and Gabriella.” Seb had to admit, that made a lot of sense. They did look good together and they were both massively talented, even if Seb thought E.J. was a little stuck-up. E.J. went to kiss Nini and Seb crinkled up his nose a little bit at the P.D.A. No matter what, he realized, this production was going to be full of drama. 

Seb was greeted by a barrage of questions as soon as he entered the front door after school. He gratefully took the snack his mother had made him and answered her questions about classes and the show as quickly yet politely as he could. He was eager to be alone after the exciting day he’d had. Being confident was exhausting.  
He fully intended to start working on his audition as soon as he got upstairs, but his mind had wandered by the time he had climbed up the steps to his room. He slid into his comfy desk chair and booted up his computer. He took a deep breath as he pulled up Instagram. His cursor hovered over the search bar. He couldn’t believe what he was about to do.  
He typed in Carlos and thousands of accounts popped up, but he only cared about the first one. He clicked on the account named fabulouscarlos and started scrolling. His Instagram was amazing; the guy obviously had a great eye. Seb would have to have him teach him how he did it. Seb had just gotten the app that summer and was still very unsure how to use it. He sighed and clicked the follow button. To his surprise, an almost immediate request to follow back showed up in his feed. He had to resist doing a little happy dance. As he clicked the accept button, his dad called up to him to remind him to feed the chickens. His happiness was so intense though that even his normally dreary tasks couldn’t erase the smile off of his face for the rest of the night. 

September 4, 2019  
Seb nearly fell asleep many times in the class the next day because he had stayed up so late preparing for the audition. By the time the final bell rang, though, he was alert from the anxiety pumping through him. His stomach was a tangle of nerves as he made his way on jiggly legs to the auditorium.  
The dressing room was a scene of chaos: actors were scrambling to find their jazz shoes, warm up their voices, or even trying to find the new drama teacher to sidle up to her. He stood back in the corner, feeling extremely awkward. He had worn his favorite lucky red vest today. Hopefully, it would give him the strength he needed to perform today because he sure wasn’t feeling confident right now. This part meant everything to him, and he really didn’t want to screw up.  
He was glad when Miss Jenn came into the room and called everyone to attention to start dance auditions. Seb wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible. The choreography was extremely difficult, and Seb was a little intimidated at first. But Carlos was an excellent teacher, and Seb found that his need to impress him helped him pick up on the steps fairly quickly.  
Everyone was sweating profusely by the time they broke off into groups to perform it for Miss Jenn. Seb’s group went first, and he tried not to make eye contact with Carlos as he danced. He felt shaky, but he smiled his way through, feeling like he picked up on most of the steps okay. Some of the groups that performed after him had amazing dancers, though. There was a new girl who had the most amazing high kicks ever.  
When Miss Jenn told them to pair up to read sides, Seb felt his nerves flare up again. He ended up next to Nini. She looked even more nervous than him, poor thing. He smiled at her assuredly but he wasn’t sure if she noticed.  
He was proud when she spoke up herself and told Miss Jenn she wanted to read for Gabriella, even if it did take prompting from E.J. It was obvious that he took the lead in their relationship. Seb didn’t know why, but it added another pit to his stomach. Although that might have been the fact that Miss Jenn and Carlos were now standing right in front of him.  
“You’re reading for Ryan, right?” she asked. Seb couldn’t help but feel disappointed even though he had expected her to assume that. He opened his mouth to correct her, but to his surprise, Carlos beat him to the punch.  
“I think he’d rather play Sharpay,” Carlos whispered not-so-quietly to Miss Jenn. Seb could feel a grin overtake his face, his shoulders rising with relief. He hadn’t realized how much he’d needed someone like Carlos in his life until now.  
Miss Jenn turned back to Seb, an intrigued look on her face. Seb was worried she was going to shoot it down, but she simply smiled and said, “I love that. That is so fresh!”  
The rest of the audition passed mostly uneventfully, although Seb had been lucky enough to be asked by his choir teacher to accompany the auditions on the piano. He tried not to be too intimidated by how amazing the other singers were. As much as he was suspicious of E.J., he had to admit that the guy had a great voice. The new girl, who he found out was named Gina, belted out a beautiful alto version of “The Start of Something New.”  
The day got interesting, though, when a voice shouted from the back doors of the auditorium right as Nini was about to perform.  
“Am I too late? Am I too late?” the newcomer frantically shouted as he ran down the aisles. Shock swept through the crowd.  
True to showbiz, though, Miss Jenn was nonplussed. “We’re all set on Troys, we’re low on Chads. You can read after the Gabriellas.”  
“I only studied the Troy scenes in the movies,” the boy said, stepping into the light. Seb’s jaw nearly dropped when he realized who it was. Ricky, Nini’s ex. Seb didn’t think he had stepped foot into the theater until today.  
“Troy would’ve arrived on time,” Carlos quipped, and Seb eagerly nodded to himself in agreement. This was kind of a theater faux-pas. Ricky obviously didn’t understand theater etiquette.  
“Thanks, let me do the talking,” Miss Jenn cut in bluntly, obviously trying to get a hold of the situation. But just as Nini was about to start again, Miss Jenn spilled her coffee on the tech board, causing the lighting to short out.  
“Nini, let’s wait for the lights to come again. I don’t want this to throw you,” Miss Jenn said, obviously a little panicked. To everyone’s surprise, though, a boldness seemed to grip Nini.  
“I’m not thrown,” she said simply, and her sweet yet powerful voice slowly rose to fill the room. There was a pause as everyone got over their shock. This was a side of Nini that no one had seen before. The girl obviously had major talent hidden somewhere deep inside her. Seb was barely aware of the flashlights from Ricky and E.J.’s phone because he was so caught up in the performance. The lights came up right as she ended, breaking the moment.  
Finally, it was Ricky’s turn to go. He went a lot off-book for the Chad sides, so Seb couldn’t say he was totally surprised when he said that he had prepared his own song. It was vaguely familiar, and Seb realized halfway through that it was a slightly different version of the song Nini had written for him in the summer. Obviously this was some way he was trying to win Nini back. Seb just shook his head. This day was getting weirder and weirder. 

Seb tried to hang back as everyone was leaving to talk to Carlos, but he was obviously busy. He was leaned into the center of the table, his forehead nearly touching Miss Jenn’s as they talked animatedly back and forth. Seb was pushed into the crowd and into the hallway. Suddenly, Carlos came rushing out of the auditorium doors. Everyone stood there stunned for a minute until they realized what was in his hands. It was the cast list! They all rushed to follow him.  
“Clear,” the choreographer shouted as he strode into the main hallway. He taped the green sheet of paper to one of the display cases with conviction. It might have just been a piece of paper, but it meant everything to Seb. His stomach ached as he waited for his turn to get to the front.  
His eyes scanned the page as soon as he got close enough. Troy Bolton…. Ricky Bowen, the top of the list said, and Seb nearly did a double-take. That was going to be very interesting. He passed by Gabriella Montez…. Nini Salazar-Roberts as his focus trailed down the page. Good for her, he thought, but what he truly cared about was a few lines below that. Sharpay Evans...Seb Matthew-Smith, it read, and Seb had to catch his breath. He read it again, just to make sure he wasn’t imagining things as he stepped away from the wall. He hadn’t truly thought that he would be given a shot at this. His plan to live this truth this year was already paying off, and Seb couldn’t be happier. 

Seb didn’t think his day could get better until he heard a notification from his computer late that night. He put down the biology book he had been attempting to read to check it.  
message from fabulouscarlos the screen said, and Seb had to bite back a scream of joy. He took a breath to collect himself before clicking open the message.  
~Hey, amazing job at auditions today  
I can’t wait to see what you bring to the role of Sharpay~  
It was a simple statement, a near formality in the theater world, but it meant everything to Seb. He tried not to overthink his response  
~Thank you so much. I can’t wait to work with you  
And thanks for supporting my crazy idea. I really owe it to you ~  
~Don’t even mention it, Seb. I’m only here to make you shine ~  
~I have no doubt that you will ~  
~Goodnight Seb, see you tomorrow? ~  
~Okay : ) Goodnight, Carlos~  
If anyone could have seen Seb in that moment, his room dark except for the flood of light from his computer screen, they would have seen him turn an impressive shade of pink. He climbed into bed and drifted off into a wonderful sleep with thoughts of a certain brown-eyed boy filling his head. 

September 5, 2019  
Carlos was waiting for Seb at the door to the choir room when he stepped out into the hallway. Seb stopped for a second in surprise.  
“What are you doing here?” he asked.  
“Nice to see you, too,” Carlos snorted. He started walking towards the cafeteria and library.  
“I mean, like, how do you know my schedule?” Seb stumbled on his words as he followed after Carlos like a lost puppy.  
“I’m a T.A. for Miss Jenn during first period. I might have used her computer to look it up.” Carlos blushed a little. “You weren’t responding to your DMs.”  
“I wasn’t at my computer,” Seb protested. Carlos whipped around in the middle of the hall.  
“You don’t have Instagram on your phone?” he asked a little incredulously. “Oh, Sebby, you need some help.” Seb tried not to think too much into the nickname, but he knew he would be replaying Carlos’s voice saying it on repeat.  
“I do. I mean, I don’t know how-” Seb started, and Carlos held out his hand.  
“Just give me your phone,” he sighed exasperated, and Seb didn’t realize he was being serious at first.  
“Like, right now?” Carlos did his little eyebrow-raise-head-tilt in affirmation. Most people would find Carlos’s no-bullshit attitude a little off-putting, but Seb appreciated it. And, if he had to admit, he found it kind of hot.  
Seb stumbled to unzip the side pocket of his backpack and ended up just pulling it off of his back and plunking it on the floor in the middle of the hallway. He had always been annoyed by the people who did that last year, but he had promised himself he wouldn’t be afraid to take up space this year.  
He finally surrendered his old iPhone 5 to Carlos, who grabbed it greedily. He looked down at the lock screen of a picture of Seb’s favorite cow and sighed.  
“Can we find someplace else to do this?” He asked, “this might take a while.” 

The boys ended up on one of the big red benches in the front of the school, Seb’s massive backpack between them.  
“I haven’t sat out here before,” Carlos had said as they sat down.  
“You’re not missing much,” said Seb derisively. “Unless you want to watch popular straight couples act like they think no one’s watching them make out.” His heart stopped for a minute when he realized what he had said. When he said he would be more confident, he didn’t mean outing himself to the first boy that gave him attention. He couldn’t dare to hope that he would understand. If Carlos was surprised, though, he didn’t show it.  
“Good thing for you that I’m none of those things. Obviously, ” he quipped in typical Carlos fashion. His eyes lit up with amusement. Seb blushed, a riot of emotions and thoughts tumbling around in his head. He had kind of already assumed this about Carlos, but he wasn’t quite sure how to respond to the assertiveness of the comment.  
“Oh, um, me either,” he replied nervously before he could fully process what the other boy had said. What had just happened? Seb couldn’t believe how fast he had thrown himself into this moment after agonizing about it so much. The air around them suddenly felt different as the two boys realized how much deeper their similarities were.  
They looked at each other with wide eyes, neither knowing what to say next. Carlos finally broke the awkwardness by glancing down at his lap and realizing he still had Seb’s phone in his hand.  
“What’s your password?” the choreographer asked. Seb collected himself as best as he could.  
“7/1/04. My birthday,” he relinquished. He hadn’t ever given anyone his password before, not even one of his five siblings. Is this what making a true friend felt like? Or something more? Seb shook his head to clear it. He knew he was overthinking this way too much.  
Carlos nodded, his lanky fingers dancing across the screen as he plugged it in. Seb barely blinked before the other boy had the app pulled up on his phone.  
“Here, put in your information,” Carlos said, handing the phone back to Seb so that he could log into his account. Seb felt a jolt of electricity travel down his spine when their fingers touched.  
The rest of the lunch period passed very quickly. Carlos had leaned over Seb’s backpack to look at the screen while he put him through an Instagram boot camp. Seb hung on every word about themes and tags, even if he was distracted by the minty smell of Carlos’s toothpaste. Their faces were so close together that Seb couldn’t help but notice how intent the other boy’s face was every time he glanced up.  
The bell rang suddenly. Carlos looked up in surprise, broken from his trance.  
“There’s our cue, I guess,” he said, standing up. There was an awkward pause until Seb realized that he was waiting for him to follow. He slid himself off the bench and swung his backpack onto his shoulders. They made their way side by side up the front steps, and Seb couldn’t help but think how much had changed in only a few days when he had walked through them for his first day.  
They paused inside the doors, unsure of what happened next. Seb had never had someone to walk with him in the halls before.  
“Thank you, Carlos. This was nice.”  
“Of course, Sebby,” Carlos smiled. “You’re good company.”  
“So, are we on again for tomorrow?” Seb asked hesitantly, trying not to get his hopes up.  
Carlos’s face fell. “I’m really sorry, Seb. I can’t tomorrow. But I’ll talk to you later. I expect to see some fire posts this weekend, okay?”  
Seb nodded as Carlos walked away again. He registered disappointment in the mix of the millions of different emotions whirling through him. There was no way he was paying attention to any history this afternoon.


	2. Gotta Get Your Head in the Game (ep. 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> events of episode 2 of HSMTM:TS from Seb's perspective- an anxious readthrough, Seb calms Carlos down after a disastrous rehearsal, and Miss Jenn has a special surprise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one was so short- Seb isn't in episode 2 a whole lot. This chapter is mostly just filler scenes to lead into the juicy bits ooohh

September 9, 2019   
The boys had their lunch meeting on Thursday, and the rest of the weekend passed without any sighting or message from Carlos. Seb was itching to talk to him by Monday afternoon. Unfortunately, he got turned around on his way to the first read-through and arrived through the door as everyone was already taking their seats. There was an empty spot marked “Sharpay Evans” on the other side of the room and Seb hurried to sit and set his bag down. His heart stopped when he realized that the seat next to him was marked “choreographer.” Had Carlos sat them next to each other on purpose?   
“Don’t forget to silence your phones,” Miss Jenn said to get everyone’s attention, plunking herself down in the director’s desk. Carlos looked over at Seb and smiled for the briefest moment as he settled himself in his seat. Seb tried not to be too self-conscious about his own shaky smile. He was all too aware of Carlos’s foot brushing against his.   
Miss Jenn leaned into the circle, preparing herself for the obligatory first-rehearsal speech. “I realize that you all walked in here as strangers,” she started, but Ashlyn interrupted her.   
“Actually, E.J.’s my cousin,” she contributed enthusiastically, but Miss Jenn was not amused. She chose to ignore the girl’s comment.   
“But after today, you’re a family,” she continued. “One tribe. Committed to lifting this classic film to new heights.”   
It would have been a sweet moment, but she was interrupted again, this time by Carlos. He pulled out his phone for a selfie with his name tag, even though Miss Jenn had already told them to put away their phones. The boy really was dedicated to his social media presence. Miss Jenn gave him a teacher glance that Seb felt in his bones.   
“Please take your neighbor’s hand,” Miss Jenn said, and Seb gasped inwardly. Carlos immediately held his hand out and Seb took it hesitantly, biting his lip. Carlos’s hand was soft, and Seb felt bad because he could tell his own palms were extremely sweaty. There was an awkward moment until the cast finally all relaxed in each other’s grips.   
“Feel each other’s energies. Let the silence speak volumes,” Miss Jenn said. Seb closed his eyes. He might as well try to get into character. “In a word full of nos, this is a space for yes.”   
“Nice. Did you just come up with that?” Carlos asked in awe. Seb opened his eyes to see the impressed look on his face. Seb thought that Miss Jenn was a good role model for Carlos. He needed someone to encourage him to be himself.   
“I did,” Miss Jenn replied, and Carlos sighed. There was a long moment of silence, and Seb thought that this read-through wasn’t going to be as much of a trainwreck as he thought. That was until Miss Jenn started singing a rendition of “All in this Together” in her screechy soprano. Any magic there might have been was lost due to the looks of bewilderment that passed through the circle. Carlos seemed to be into it, his hands still firmly linked with Seb’s, but he worshipped the ground that Miss Jenn walked on.   
A stunned silence followed the high note. Ashlyn was the only one who clapped. Awkward first read through indeed. 

The rest of the read-through passed painfully. Seb stumbled through his lines. He already had them basically memorized, but it was a very different experience when he had to decide how to deliver them. On top of that, their fill-in stage manager didn’t seem to have passed third-grade reading fluency.   
Exasperated with the pace, Miss Jenn called a five-minute break, but she monopolized Carlos’ attention so Seb couldn’t talk to him. He looked around the circle awkwardly.   
His eyes locked with Ashlyn’s and he did a double-take. No way! They had the same glasses! Before he could think against it he leaped up from his seat and into the one next to her.   
“Cool glasses,” he blurted. Ashlyn looked up from her script and smiled.   
“Thanks, they’re my grandma’s” she replied, returning to highlighting her lines.   
“I have the same ones at home.” This caused Ashlyn to look up again in puzzlement.   
“Really? Why?” she asked.   
“So I can see when I’m milking!” Seb let his excitement get the best of him. He realized a little too late that this might not be a normal topic of discussion. He felt embarrassed, but at least he was trying to make new friends.  
“Oh, that’s cool I guess,” Ashlyn said sweetly.   
Just then, Miss Jenn called the group back to order and Seb was forced back to his seat. Not a total disaster at least. Theater people were the kindest people Seb had ever met. 

That night, Seb waited until right before bed to check his notifications. He had been obsessively checking for messages from Carlos all weekend to no avail, and he didn’t want to be disappointed again. To his pleasant surprise, though, there was a message waiting for him on Instagram.   
~ Hey, Seb, can I ask you favor? ~ Was the message from 20 minutes ago from fabulouscarlos   
~Of course : ) ~ Seb replied eagerly  
~ I know you aren’t scheduled for rehearsal  
tomorrow, but I could really use some back-up. Can   
you come play the piano during it? ~  
~I’d love to! Consider it done ~  
~Thanks, Sebby. You’re the best : ) ~  
Just like that, all the anxiety and weirdness of the day washed off of him. Seb looked forward to another thrilling day of rehearsal with all of his new favorite people.

September 10, 2019   
The next day of rehearsal turned out to be a disaster. Ricky refused to cooperate to learn the dance, much to the rest of the room’s annoyance. Seb tried to be patient, but it was upsetting him that Carlos was getting upset.   
Carlos had them run through the bows dance again, but it just broke out into a major argument between Ricky and Nini. He wished they would work out their relationship drama outside of rehearsal. He guessed he couldn’t blame theater kids for being dramatic though. Carlos came storming over to the piano. He signaled to start the song again and Seb raised his hands above the keys. Everyone was in position for the top of the dance except the leading couple. It was obvious they weren’t going to get much more rehearsal done today. Nini was absolutely tearing into Ricky for his disrespect.   
“Okay! That’s a five! On a break, people! Everybody out! Get out!” Carlos’s voice was nearly hysterical. He was obviously very stressed and not used to leading in these types of situations. It made Seb almost feel guilty even though he had been doing his best to make Carlos’s life easier. 

Carlos disappeared out the door before Seb could get up from the piano, but he caught up with him in the hall. The choreographer was pacing back and forth, looking around wildly at the chaos the ensemble around him.   
“Hey, are you okay?” Seb asked. Carlos shook his head in distress.   
“No, I’m not Seb,” he snipped. “Everything is falling apart already.” The words bit at Seb. He understood Carlos was stressed, but Seb didn’t feel like he deserved rebuke. Besides, he believed in Carlos too much to let him give in this soon.   
“Hey, you don’t have to take it out on me,” Seb replied gently, trying to express his worry. Carlos paused then, visibly relaxing. He finally stopped to look at Seb and his eyes spoke of regret. They were just the words Carlos needed to jolt him from his spiral.   
“You’re right, I’m sorry Seb.” A new resolve seemed to come over Carlos. He raised his voice to address the crowd.   
“Hey, everyone, I think we can call it for today. Make sure you practice tonight!” His voice echoed throughout the hall. The cast members who were left nodded and began to mill towards the front entrance far down the hallway.   
“Thanks for being there for me today, Seb. You’re literally the most patient person I’ve ever met.” Carlos’s grateful smile lit up the hall, and Seb’s insides turned to gush at the compliment. He would wait forever for Carlos, but he was too scared to say that.   
“It was really nothing. I just want to make your job easier.” The two boys stood there facing each other for a moment, their toes practically touching. Their eyes and smiles said a million words.   
“I, uh, better go check on our Troy and Gabriella,” Carlos realized, easing the awkwardness from the conversation.   
“Of course,” Seb agreed, placing a hand on his backpack strap. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” Carlos smiled. Then, as he was turning to leave, he added “Good luck!”   
“I’m going to need it!” Carlos called back as they departed in different directions. Seb turned his head around as he walked to smile at him, making eye contact one last time as Carlos disappeared into the rehearsal room. 

September 11, 2019   
The next day was so much better. He had woken up to a Sharpay GIF from Carlos, and he met him at his locker after school to walk with him to rehearsal. It wasn’t much, but Seb appreciated Carlos taking time out of his busy schedule all the same.   
Towards the end of rehearsal, Miss Jenn re-entered the room carrying a giant cardboard box.   
“Gather around everyone! There’s been an extra special delivery!” Eagerly, the cast rushed her to get a glimpse inside the box. Carlos and Seb had been closest to the door, so they ended up kneeling in the front on either end of the package, Miss Jenn between them.   
There was an awkwardly long moment of rustling while their director struggled to unwrap what was inside.   
“Here it is people,” she said, holding a silver hand-held device with tons of buttons that was obviously from the early 2000s. It was pretty anti-climatic, to be honest.   
“Is that.. a garage door opener?” Seb asked, confused. He had never seen one since his family had never had one. Or a garage.   
The look on Miss Jenn’s face was one of disbelief.   
“No Seb,” she sighed. “This is Gabriella’s phone from the film.” Gasps of delights rippled across the group. Seb couldn’t believe he didn’t recognize it. He felt his jaw drop.   
“I plan on creating a time-capsule display in our lobby,” Miss Jenn announced. Everyone was regarding Miss Jenn with apt, wide-eyed attention. “If they can have 40 sports ball trophies, we deserve a little movie museum.” Seb could feel the excitement expanding in the room.   
Miss Jenn let the moment pass, then capitalized on their energy. “Okay, everyone, enough dazzle, fetch your scripts please.”  
It was a small thing to bond over, but Seb felt the entire energy of the cast shift. Everyone began to realize that they had something truly special on their hands, and Seb felt his respect for Miss Jenn increase astronomically. Even though she was new, she knew how to rally a cast together. They were much stronger with her on their side.


	3. You Know You Can Message Me Anytime? (ep. 3)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> events in the time period of episode 3 of HSMTMTS from Seb's perspective- basically just Seb and Carlos start texting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seb isn't actually in episode 3 :( so I took some creative liberties. These are basically some scenes I would've liked to see in the show that could take place in the time between episodes 2 and 4. The action is picking up oooh

September 23, 2019  
The next few weeks of rehearsals went without much incident. Seb was becoming very close with the rest of the cast, and he was truly having the most fun. He hadn’t been able to talk to Carlos as much as he wanted, but it was mostly because Seb still felt really awkward around him. He wasn’t sure if Carlos wanted to be his friend or if he was just being friendly.   
Seb’s parents were out of town picking up parts for their tractor that afternoon, so he had time to kill before they picked him up. He decided to walk to the Publick Cafe after rehearsal to treat himself while he waited. It was a cozy place, and it was drizzling a little as Seb drifted down the street so it was the perfect day for it.   
He ordered his drink from the bored, purple-haired cashier who Seb knew was a senior at East High. He turned around and nearly dropped his change.   
“Are you okay?” the girl asked.   
“Oh, uh, yeah,” Seb stumbled, shoving the change into his hoodie pocket. He blushed, taking tentative steps across the cafe floor, weaving through the tables.   
He couldn’t believe that Carlos was here, or how much of a fool he had made of himself. He was practically standing right in front of the boy’s booth and he hadn’t looked up from his laptop though, so Seb didn’t think he had noticed. Carlos was obviously busy. Seb thought he would just say hi and leave him to his work. Easy enough, right? He thought he would probably find a way to mess it up anyway.   
“Hi,” he breathed. Carlos didn’t look up.   
“Hey,” he said, a lot louder. Carlos looked up abruptly.   
“Oh hey, Seb. You scared me a little.” His face visibly relaxed into a smile. “What brings you here?” He pushed his laptop to the side, turning his body and attention towards him. Seb gulped.   
“Oh, uh, my parents are out of town picking up parts for our tractor, you know, for our farm, so I’m waiting for them to swing back through town.” Seb winced as the words left his mouth. That was way too much information. Carlos definitely didn’t want to hear about their farm.   
“Oh, that’s cool. I didn’t know they owned a farm.” His words were nonchalant, but not disinterested or hurried. “I should’ve figured because of the cow.”   
“What?” Seb asked, very confused. What was Carlos talking about? He felt a little panicky.   
“Your lock screen? Isn’t that one of your cows?” Carlos asked.   
“Oh yeah,” said Seb, relaxing. “I forgot about that.” Obviously not the fact that Carlos had been on his phone though. He thought about that every day.   
Both boys chuckled at this, the tension diffused. Seb thought it was time to make his escape while he hadn’t embarrassed himself too much.   
“Well, um, I’ll let you get you back to your work. I didn’t mean to bother you. I just wanted to say hi... I mean.. I’ll see you later.” He turned around to hide his blush but Carlos’s voice stopped him from moving forward.   
“Seb, please sit.” His voice was both commanding and understanding at the same time. Seb’s heart fluttered with happiness. Was this what hope felt like? He turned back around and saw Carlos’s hand gesturing to the bench across from him. “You’re not bothering me,” Carlos said, his warm brown eyes caring as Seb slid into the booth.   
“Really?” Seb asked. He had figured that his presence was a sort of nuisance to Carlos since he had so much to do for the show.   
“I promise.” The boys smiled at each other. Carlos couldn’t have known how much those words meant to Seb. “I guess this is what friends do, right? Meet up for coffee?” Carlos asked like he wasn’t sure what exactly friends did. They had that in common at least.   
“Is that what we are? Friends?” Seb asked, and to his surprise, it sounded halfway flirty. Look at him, teasing around a boy he used to be too scared to even talk to. Baby steps toward confidence.   
“I thought so. I mean, if you’d like. It kind of feels like fate is pushing us together.” It was the first time Seb had heard Carlos remotely unsure of himself. It was really cute. And flattering that he was so nervous. It hurt Seb’s heart because he knew exactly how he felt.   
“I’d like that a lot.” Seb grinned. Carlos’s shoulders visibly relaxed as he smiled back. The boys stared at each other for a long moment that would have been awkward if the barista hadn’t called his name at that exact moment.   
“Order for Seb,” she droned.   
“I.. uh... better get that.” Seb flushed.   
“Yeah, that’s probably a good idea,” replied Carlos, not missing a beat. Seb pushed himself up from the booth.   
“What did you order?” Carlos asked, placing his phone back face-down on the table as Seb returned.   
“Oh, uh, it’s a hot chocolate. I’m not really a coffee person.”   
Carlos’s face at these words was one of shock and betrayal.   
“This might be the shortest-lived friendship in history, Seb. I never thought I could be friends with someone who didn’t drink coffee.”   
“Oh,” said Seb, his face falling. “I could try it maybe?”   
“I was only kidding, Sebby.” Seb sighed in relief, scrunching up his face at his own stupidity. When would he learn to be comfortable around other boys? “That’s really sweet though.” Seb blushed once again. Carlos smiled coyly as he took a sip of his own drink.   
“What do you have? Black coffee?” Seb provoked.   
“Yes, actually.” Carlos laughed. “Black like my soul.” Seb raised his eyebrows. “Or the opposite, I guess.” A thoughtful look passed over Carlos’s face. There it was again, that unspoken understanding between them.   
“I don”t know, you’re a little bit bitter,” Seb quipped back. Carlos guffawed in surprise.   
“You’re a wise guy now, eh?” he said. Seb just shrugged. Carlos’s mood shifted into a more serious tone. “Look, I am really sorry I’ve been so busy. I really have been wanting to get to know you.”   
“I understand. It’s partly my fault because I was too scared to start a conversation with you. I’m kind of new to being comfortable talking. To anyone. I kind of made a pact that I would put myself out there this year.” Seb made himself stop talking because he felt himself rambling. Did he really say that?   
“I definitely understand. I think you’re good at talking though. I’m glad you’re putting yourself out there.” Seb’s insides felt all gushy. He fought to hold back a massive grin. How did Carlos always know the exact right thing to say? “ And you know you can message me any time, right?’   
Seb nodded. The only thing holding him back before had been that he hadn’t heard Carlos say that out loud. Pride flared in Seb’s chest as he realized that he had just made a friend all on his own. Thank goodness he had decided to stop by the cafe today. 

October 1, 2019  
As soon as the bell for lunch rang, Seb lunged into his backpack. He had texted Carlos that morning saying he needed to talk to him and he had been eagerly awaiting a reply.   
~Meet me in the library ~the message said when Seb checked his Instagram. Hastily, he flung his bag onto his back and marched out of the music room behind the other choir kids. 

Seb found Carlos hunched over a computer, his headphones plugged in. The tables were low to the ground, so Carlos’s chest blocked the screen from view. Seb took a moment to admire the choreographer in his element before sliding into the chair next to him.   
“Hey,” he breathed, placing his left hand on the table between them.   
“Hey,” Carlos replied, looking up from the screen. He pulled his headphones out and turned to look at Seb. He placed his right hand in front of Seb’s on the edge of the table. Their fingers were inches from each other, and Seb tried not to think about how easy it would be to just scoot his hand over and intertwine it with Carlos’s like at the read-through.   
“I think the librarian was glaring at me when I walked in,” Seb said, and Carlos laughed at his confused expression.   
“Don’t worry about Ms. Bright. She looks scary but really she’s lonely. She and my mom play Bunco together every Thursday night. I can put it in a good word for you.” Seb smiled. His heart melted at the idea of Carlos and his mom playing Bunco with the grumpy old librarian.   
“What did you want to talk about?” Carlos asked eagerly. Seb appreciated that he was always to the point.   
“I need your help,” Seb admitted. “I feel like I’m utterly failing the Stick to the Status Quo dance.” When Carlos had pitched the idea to Seb, he had been so excited that Seb had just swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded. But the truth was he was scared. And until he got comfortable dancing with a partner, he would never nail the dance. It made him very uncomfortable to ask the guy he was trying to impress for help, but this year was a new Seb. A new Seb that couldn’t ignore the part of him that said that this would be a good way to get closer to Carlos.   
“No way! You’re killing it Seb!” Seb flushed at the compliment. He knew Carlos didn’t hand out flattery that wasn’t true. “But if you wanted to we could work on it one-on-one sometime?”   
Seb paused. Deep down he knew this is what he had subconsciously wanted, but the idea of him and Carlos alone set off alarms of panic in his brain. He hadn’t expected Carlos to offer his assistance so willingly though. He figured if Carlos was suggesting it he had nothing to lose by accepting.   
“That would be great,” Seb said, relieved. “I’ll check my schedule and I’ll let you know when I’m free.” Carlos paused for a minute, and Seb could see several thoughts cross his mind.   
“Should we just exchange numbers?” Carlos asked. “You know, for convenience sake?” He asked it casually, but both boys knew this was a big step in their friendship. Seb’s heart leaped out of his chest.   
“Yeah, for convenience sake,” Seb managed with a tight-lipped nod. He couldn’t hide how intimate this felt though. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and handed it to Carlos.   
The choreographer entered his number, putting a salsa dancer emoji next to his name, which made Seb laugh. Carlos sent himself a message from Seb’s phone.   
“I’m adding you as Sebby into my phone just so you know,” Carlos announced, and Seb felt his insides melt a little bit. Carlos smiled at Seb when he was done typing as if he didn’t notice the riot of emotions those words elicited in Seb.   
“Here, let me show you what I was watching,” Carlos said, handing Seb one of the earbuds. Seb scooted his chair closer to Carlos and their shoulders brushed as he started the video. A bubble formed around the two boys that Seb thought he would be happy to spend forever in. 

October 3, 2019  
Seb felt his phone ping in his pocket during the middle of dinner that night. Without thinking, he looked away from his chicken, mashed potatoes, and peas to check his notifications. As he had hoped and suspected, it was from Carlos.   
~Bunco night with Ms. Bright ~ Attached was a photo of Carlos smiling with their crotchety, gray-haired librarian. She looked caught off guard and Seb had to laugh. ~Wish you were here ~ the next text appeared, and Seb’s face broke out in a smile.   
~Looks like fun ~ he replied.   
Seb looked up then and realized a sea of blonde heads was staring at him.   
“What?” he asked, caught off guard. He hadn’t realized his family had been paying attention to him.   
“Your mother asked you a question,” Seb’s father said. He was a gentle man, much quieter than Seb’s mother.   
“Oh, uh, I’m sorry what was it?”   
“I was asking how your English test went, Seb.” She asked it like it was irrelevant now, which it probably was.   
“Oh, it was fine.” This seemed to abate his mother for the moment, but his siblings wanted their chance to interrogate him, too.   
“Who were you texting?” Seb’s 10-year-old brother Sam asked.   
“I think Seb has a crush!” Sarah declared. She was 13 and the self-appointed matchmaker of East Middle School. Seb blushed scarlet at this. Her instincts were actually pretty accurate most of the time.   
“Is that true, Seb?” Sabrina seemed hurt that she wouldn’t have already known this. Out of all of his siblings, he was closest to Sabrina since they were closest in age. She was a senior at East High this year. Usually, Seb went to her to confide, but they had been drifting apart since Seb had started high school.   
Seb had never admitted any crushes to his family before. Even if he did, this one felt different. He had barely admitted it to himself what he felt about Carlos. It was scary and Seb wanted to keep their good moments to himself. There was also, of course, the unspoken fact that no one knew he liked boys.   
Despite all of that, Seb felt himself nodding in response to Sabrina’s question. How’s that for confidence, eh? He knew he couldn’t lie to his family, and a bigger part of him was excited to share this new part of his life. The happiness that he felt surrounding Carlos threatened to escape at any given moment.   
“Who is she?” His dad gestured towards the phone, half-joking, half genuinely curious. Seb had to hold back a snort. His parents had always been like this: inspecting every aspect of Seb’s life. Give them an inch, they stretch into a mile. Well, they were in for a shock. Even though it terrified him, Seb took a deep breath. He would be remiss if he didn’t take advantage of this opportunity since he had been waiting months for it.   
“His name is Carlos. He’s the choreographer for the musical.” He had to force the words up his throat. They got caught several times on the way out.   
His words were met with silence. His siblings actually put down their forks to gape at him.   
“We’re just friends,” Seb clarified. “But I do, uh, like him.” There, he said it. He leaned back in his chair and forced himself to breathe.   
Sarah was the first to recover from her shock. She thrived under these kinds of conditions. “I KNEW you liked someone!” She shouted gleefully.   
“That’s great, Seb,” Sabrina added, squeezing Seb’s shoulder. The message was clear: even if they weren’t as close as they used to be, she would always be there for him.   
Seb turned to either end of the table for his parent’s reactions. His parents weren’t extremely conservative, and he knew logically they would support him no matter what, but he couldn’t help but be nervous. His parents’ approval meant everything to him.   
“I’m so glad you’re putting yourself out there, Seb. I’m happy he makes you happy. I’m mostly upset you were texting at the dinner table, to be honest.” His mother chose her words carefully, but she always instinctively knew just what to say. His dad nodded. He tended to agree with whatever his wife said. Seb took a great sigh of relief.   
“I am sorry about that. It won’t happen again,” Seb promised, referring to putting his phone away at dinner. That, he could handle.   
“I know, Seb,” his mother hummed. His dad cleared his throat.   
“You know, you should bring this young man around some time to meet us.” Seb opened his mouth in protest, but his dad cut him off.   
“Even if you are just friends,” he added. His mom nodded.   
“We’re really proud of you, bub. For everything.” Seb held back tears as his siblings, even his 6-year old sister Sophie, came around to hug him. The moment was even better than Seb could’ve ever expected.


	4. What I've Been Looking For (ep. 4)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The events of the day of episode 4 from Seb's perspective- Nini is suspicious of EJ, Natalie's missing her hamster, and Seb and Carlos plan for an extra rehearsal

October 4, 2019  
Seb headed down to the storage room backstage for lunch the next day because he had promised Miss Jenn he would help sort props. He was surprised when he opened the door and saw a small figure in dark pigtails and blue top slumped against the far wall between two massive boxes.   
“Oh,” Seb gasped, stopping in his tracks. Nini looked up wild-eyed from her phone, her face passing from sadness to shock to a pleasant smile in a split second.   
“Oh my gosh, Seb, hey!” She placed her phone in her lap and started drumming on it with her fingers. He could tell she was full of nervous energy.   
“I.. uh, didn’t realize anyone was in here,” Seb mumbled. “I can leave if you need me too.” She had obviously come down here to be alone.   
“Oh no, it’s totally fine,” she assured him. He didn’t know if she actually cared if he was there or not, but she was such a sweet girl that she wouldn’t complain anyway. Seb nodded, setting his bag down on top of an extremely dusty filing cabinet. He weaved through the racks of costumes to the far wall of props.   
“What are you working on?” Nini stood up suddenly and made her way towards him. Why was she interested in what he was doing? She probably had a billion other things on her mind.   
“Oh, uh, Miss Jenn asked me to help sort through all these props and take out what we can use for the show,” Seb said dismissively, gesturing towards the floor-to-ceiling shelves of boxes.   
“What can I do to help?” she asked resolutely, placing her hand on her hip.   
“Oh, you don’t have to-” Seb started, but Nini cut him off.   
“No, I want to,” she pleaded. “I could use the distraction.” Seb’s shoulders relaxed and he nodded in understanding. He handed her box overflowing with hats.   
“Are you okay?” Seb was concerned by the look of sadness in her eyes. He had never seen her this shaken.   
“Yeah,” she replied way too fast while closely examining an atrocious hot pink bedazzled fedora. Seb gave her a look of suspicion and she sighed. “Okay, no, but you probably don’t want to hear about my boy drama.”   
Ah, so that’s why this was about. He couldn’t say he was surprised, between the drama with Ricky and E.J. 's history of being a heartbreaker. Even if he didn’t fully understand teenage girls, his heart went out to her.   
“Try me,” he challenged. “You help me with this, and I’ll try to help with your love life. Or at least listen.” Nini smiled, sitting down cross-legged on the floor. She paused in thought for a moment as Seb dug through a box of fake styrofoam food.   
“You know that day when I lost my phone?” Nini asked, and Seb nodded in vague remembrance. “I think E.J. took it.” The words came out fast and she winced like they were the first time she said them out loud. “Does that sound crazy?” she asked nervously.   
Seb thought about it for a minute. Stealing someone’s phone seemed really extreme, but he still really didn’t know E.J. that well. Honestly, he had had a bad feeling about him from the start, but Seb didn’t want to tell Nini that.   
“No, I don’t think you’re crazy,” he finally said, tossing a fake baguette that had broken into pieces into the trash can.   
“That’s not what I asked,” Nini laughed and Seb smiled in surprise. She had him there.   
“Do you really want my honest opinion?” Oh god, why was he doing this? Nini raised her eyebrows in intrigue. Seb continued when she didn’t say anything. “I’ve always thought you were too good for E.J.” What? That wasn’t exactly what he expected himself to say, but he supposed it was true.   
“Wow,” Nini breathed in surprise. “I guess you’re right. I mean, most of the time he’s really sweet and caring and he has those EYES.” Her eyes went all glassy for a second before she realized who she was talking to. She blushed, then cleared her throat. “But then there’s like this possessive and egotistical layer underneath? It’s just so frustrating.” Seb nodded in strong agreement. He had noticed this about high school boys- how they had such fragile masculinities. Well, except for one, but that was a conversation for another time.   
“I’m so tired of dealing with boys’ emotional baggage because they can’t deal with it themselves.” She was fired up now, too deep into her rant to hold back. She wasn’t looking through the hats anymore, but Seb couldn’t fault her for that. “I’m sorry, that probably sounds totally rude,” she added all of sudden, and Seb laughed.   
“Oh, no girl. I noticed the exact same thing. Boys are really confusing.” As soon as the words were out, he wanted to bury his face in his hands. Why oh why didn’t he know when to shut up? Nini smiled at this. She seemed confused, but apparently not the way Seb thought she would be according to her next words.  
“Yeah, I guess you’re not really like that,” she crinkled up her nose in thought. “You seem more in touch with your emotions than anyone else here.” Seb smiled gratefully at the compliment. “Except maybe Carlos,” she added. Seb turned away to grab another box to hide his blush at the comparison.   
“Thank you.” He accepted the compliment, steering the conversation away from dangerous territory. “I think being Sharpay has helped with that. Even if I feel like I have no idea what I’m doing most of the time.” Nini’s jaw dropped.   
“No way! You always look so confident in rehearsals! I don’t know how you do what you do!”   
“I don’t know how you do what you do!” Seb exclaimed honestly. “You’ve really grown since last year, Nini. I’m really glad you got Gabriella. Your voice is amazing!”   
Nini glowed at the compliment. “Oh my gosh, Seb you’re the sweetest! Why haven’t we talked until now?” Seb shrugged, and Nini’s phone dinged, reminding them both what they had been talking about in the first place.   
“What do you think I should do about E.J.?” she asked, returning to the box of hats. Seb didn’t have much, or any, experience in relationships, but he did have one idea.   
“I think you should talk to him about it. Give him a chance to fess up.” It was cliché advice, and thus often overlooked. Seb had to admit how nice it was that he was able to talk more easily now with Carlos. Not that he was close to a relationship with Carlos, but still.   
“Yeah, I know,” Nini sighed. Seb knew what she was thinking: easier said than done. “Thank you, Seb,” she said, standing up. All of a sudden she was wrapping Seb in a hug. It was a quick, friendly hug but Seb appreciated it. He didn’t remember the last time he had hugged someone outside of his family. He realized he was making friends, and he could now count Nini among them.   
“It was nice to just vent to someone,” she continued. She started bouncing on the balls of her feet, already in a much better mood than when Seb had entered the room. “You’re a good listener.” Seb smiled at her kind words. They really meant a lot to him.   
“Well, you know you can talk to me anytime,” Seb offered. “And you don’t have to sort through boxes of junk next time for me to lend an ear.”   
Nini laughed at this. “Ok, you’re hilarious. I’ll definitely take you up on that.” She made her way to her backpack, suddenly on a mission. “I’m going to head out, but I’ll see you at rehearsal?”   
Seb nodded. “Good luck, Nini.”   
She turned, already at the door frame. “Thank you, Seb.” She flashed him one last smile before slipping out the door.   
Seb looked down at the mess of hats lying on the floor and shook his head. He still had a lot of work to do, but he had already accomplished the most important task of the day: being there for his friend. 

Seb rushed to rehearsal after school. Carlos had texted him in a panic 30 minutes ago saying there had been some kind of rodent emergency? Apparently they were still dealing with it because everyone was milling outside the door and the choreographer was nowhere to be seen.   
“Hey,” Ashlyn said as he approached. “Have you heard from Natalie today?” Seb shook his head. He hadn’t been to the cafeteria for lunch, and he didn’t have any classes with the stage manager.   
“No, why?” he asked.   
“She’s in there totally freaked. Apparently something happened and she lost her hamster. Gina and Carlos went in there to help her, but they haven’t come out yet.” She tilted her eyes towards the door like she wished she could go in there and help. Seb understood how she felt. Based on Carlos’s text, the situation was not good.   
“Carlos texted me a half an hour ago, but I was in the middle of a math test.”   
“You have his number?” Ashlyn asked. Seb was confused about why that was the part of the story she had noticed.   
“Uh.. yeah?” Seb’s response came out more like a question.   
“I’ve been trying to get a hold of him for weeks! We have a biology lab due next Tuesday and he hasn’t even started his half yet.” Ashlyn hardly ever got worked up, but when she did it was kind of scary.   
“That’s weird. He always responds right away to me,” Seb thought out loud, not realizing that it wouldn’t help the situation.   
“Huh. Weird,” Ashlyn shot back sarcastically, raising her eyebrows suggestively.   
“Ashlyn! I’m sure it’s nothing like that!” Seb whispered, not wanting the others to notice his blush. She gave him a look like oh please and rolled her eyes. Okay, maybe he had been a little obvious about his crush around her. She seemed to be insinuating that the feelings were reciprocal though, which Seb couldn’t let himself believe was true.   
Ashlyn looked back down at her phone, apparently over her frustration, and Seb looked up and around at anything that wasn’t the door.   
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Nini barreling down the stairs, followed by E.J. Seb’s heart skipped a beat. He wondered if they had talked yet. Based on Nini’s cold expression and obvious discomfort, it had gone badly if they had.   
Seb couldn’t hear what they were saying, and he tried to keep looking down at his script so it wouldn’t seem like he was trying to eavesdrop. E.J. seemed confused, but Nini wasn’t letting him get a word in edgewise. It seemed like something had flipped since she left the bomb shelter at lunch. She didn’t seem to be trying to work things out with E.J. but rather explain to him every single frustration from the last few months of their relationship.   
“Oh please,” Nini shouted angrily. Everyone cringed at the sudden rise of volume in her voice. They couldn’t pretend they weren’t listening now. “Gina’s not the wonder study I have to worry about, is she?” There was a pause and E.J. led Nini a few steps away to finish their conversation in private, more hushed tones. Seb hoped they weren’t going to break up because of his advice.   
Nini was in a much calmer mood by the time she turned back to the group. “Hey, is the door locked or something? Why can’t we get in?”   
Ashlyn answered quickly, taking one for the team. No one wanted to address the weirdness that permeated the hallway. “Oh, Natalie Bagley’s missing her emotional-support hamster. He got loose.” Ashlyn explained. Nini did not look pleased with this news. “Carlos and Gina are helping her find her. Him. It.” The words were barely out of Ashlyn’s mouth when a high-pitched wail sounded through the heavy door. “I think they found it,” she added.   
There was a rustle of hushed voices while some people turned back to their conversations while others, including Seb, waited with bated breath for the door to open again if only to end the awkwardness.   
After an extended moment, the door flew open. Natalie stormed out, followed by Carlos, clutching her cardboard.   
“I need a moment,” she announced, marching away from the rehearsal room.   
“Is he dead?” Ashlyn asked Carlos with concern.   
“No,” Carlos said. It was anti-climatic, but everyone let out a collective breath. “Now she thinks he’s in her gym locker.”  
“Why the screaming?” Ashlyn asked reflexively, looking after Natalie’s rapidly retreating figure. Seb was glad she spoke up because he was also really concerned about Natalie.   
“That was me. She stepped on my toe,” Carlos admitted, brushing himself off. “We’re ready to begin, people.” Ashlyn looked over Seb like “can you believe this?” and he just shrugged and followed her through the door. It wasn’t even the strangest thing that had happened that afternoon. 

Any hope Seb might have had that whatever weirdness was happening between E.J. and Nini wouldn’t enter the rehearsal room dissipated when they realized that Ricky was running late and E.J. had to step in for Troy. They were blocking “What I’ve Been Looking For”, but it was like pulling teeth to get them to look at each other, much less act like they were in love. At one point, Miss Jenn sighed dejectedly.   
“We’re blocking this as a love scene, not a SARS epidemic,” she quipped. There were confused looks passed across the room as to what she was talking about.   
“I think that chair was over there,” Carlos butted in. He pointed at the chair right next to where Seb was sitting at the piano. Nini hurried over to grab it, eager to get away from E.J.   
“Oh, I can move it over during the scene,” she suggested, and Miss Jenn squinted her eyes.   
“Feels awkward,” she said when Nini bent over to lift it up.   
“No, it’s light, I can lift it above my head and walk,” she insisted. This poor girl obviously wasn’t thinking straight.  
“Sweetie, no one is walking around with furniture on their head,” Miss Jenn decided reasonably. “This isn’t The Lion King.” Seb didn’t remember any furniture in the movie, but that was beside the point.   
Seb sighed as she explained what striking meant to their accidental, single stagehand Big Red. Then, he tried to move the piano upstage instead of downstage as Miss Jenn wanted. Seb shook his head in disbelief. Sure, Seb still got it confused sometimes, but it was one of the most basic things you learned in theater. Finally, the poor boy asked Seb what direction stage right was! Seb just smiled politely and pointed him in the literal right direction. What a train wreck of a rehearsal. Sometimes, he wished Miss Jenn could just read the room and call it a day.   
Miss Jenn nodded at Seb, and he launched into “What I’ve Been Looking For”. The air was once again sucked out of the room when E.J. and Nini began to sing. They stared each other down like hyenas across the piano, and Seb felt extremely uncomfortable to be in the middle of it. His head bobbed between them as he tried to figure how he had gotten pulled into all this mess.   
Somehow, they made the lyrics ironic, singing through gritted teeth. He had never seen two people sing a duet while so cold towards each other. By the end, Nini had taken over, riffing with all of her godly power over E.J., who just gave up trying to follow. Seb kind of forgot he was playing by that point and the song trailed off.   
There was an awkward pause where everyone tried to avoid eye contact before Miss Jenn stood up from her chair, saying, “Okay freeze.” She walked up towards the make-shift stage. “Nini, sweetie, this reprise comes at a decisive moment in the story, once your hearts have joined. It’s a love song.”   
“Were you not getting that?” Nini asked innocently, pointing between herself and E.J. Seb had an idea about everything she was thinking after their talk at lunch today, and he couldn’t blame her for not wanting to open all of it in front of Miss Jenn.   
“I’d like to get to his heart without cracking his ribcage.” Their director was always honest, which was both necessary and a nuisance in situations like these. Seb thought Miss Jenn was unfairly favoring E.J., and he wished she knew a little more about everything that had transpired outside of the show this week.   
As if right on cue, or, Seb guessed, a little late to cue, Ricky burst through the door at that exact moment. He was obviously flustered, without a pencil or a script. Was everyone going to have a mental breakdown today? As Miss Jenn was explaining what a productive rehearsal looked like, Natalie stormed in to add to the chaos. Seb had forgotten she was still looking for her hamster!   
“Was he in your gym locker?” Ashlyn asked racing towards Natalie. No one could comfort Natalie like the extremely sympathetic Ash.   
“No, just my cherry lip balm.” Natalie sniffled. She seemed about to burst into tears. “But it had Elliot’s teeth marks in it.”   
“Oh, I’m sure that wouldn’t hurt him,” Ashlyn soothed, reaching out to brush Natalie’s arm.   
“It’s sparkly,” the stage manager deadpanned. Seb felt a sudden burst of hope.  
“Then it’ll be easier to find him!” he called to Natalie from across the room, standing up from the piano bench. All the heads in the room turned towards him at the sudden outburst. Nini and E.J. side-eyed him from the edge of the piano. “If he smiles,” he added nervously, slowly retreating into the shadows. He hadn’t meant to attract that much attention.   
Miss Jenn cut in, unamused at the unfolding chaos. After finishing her speech about being prepared for rehearsals, she sent Ricky to her office to wait for her. Seb thought for the first time that maybe their director was more stressed than she was letting on. He couldn’t lose faith in the production though, because it was giving him more and more purpose every day. Miss Jenn started to collect her binder to follow Ricky out the door.   
“We are, Ms. Darbus,” she replied when Ashlyn asked if they were done for the day. “Take a note. This is what a frustrated drama teacher looks like.” She pointed at the blank expression on her face. She dismissed them with a warning to come back when they were ready. Everyone stood up in a hurry to make it out the door.   
Seb gave Nini a glance as he passed by her, asking her if she was okay without speaking. She shook her head but smiled as if to say, “I don’t want to talk about it, but thanks.” Seb motioned to his phone to remind her she could text him, and she nodded gratefully.   
A familiar set of footsteps fell behind Seb just outside the door. Seb slowed down and turned to smile at Carlos.   
“Do you think Natalie will be okay?” Seb asked him as they walked side by side down the hall.   
“I think so,” Carlos nodded with a closed-mouth smile. “I don’t think there’s much I could do for her at this point.” Both boys’ gazes fell to their left, where Natalie and Ashlyn were running down the hall to check another location for the sparkly rodent. “I can choreograph, but this is way out of my comfort zone.”   
“I appreciate you for trying,” Seb laughed, putting his hand on Carlos’s shoulder. He looked taken aback at the acknowledgment. Seb thought he could visibly see some of the pressure lift from Carlos’s shoulders. It made Seb sad that Carlos didn’t get very much recognition for everything he did. Seb was still awed Carlos chose to give him his free time over everyone else.   
“Thanks, Sebby. This whole mess has been crazy. I think we could all use a break.” Seb nodded in agreement. Carlos used this pause to segue into what must be the real reason for the conversation. “Speaking of that, there’s no rehearsal on Wednesday. Did you want to meet after school to work on your dance?”   
Seb’s heart started fluttering. He had been anticipating this moment all week. He and Carlos had been texting consistently, but they hadn’t been alone since they were in the library the other day. Had that really been just a few days ago? Seb couldn’t ever remember a crazier week.   
“That sounds good,” Seb nodded as they burst through the front doors.   
“Okay, bye Sebby. Have a great weekend!” Carlos waved as they split in different directions.   
“Bye Carlos!” Seb called, but the other boy was already out of earshot. Just like that, Seb was left with the weekend and three days of school to be anxious about making a fool of himself for thinking any of this was a good idea.


	5. Yeah, you know, homecoming (ep. 5)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode 5 of HSMTM:TS from Seb's perspective- this is my favorite episode, and I've never seen anyone write about the whole cow fiasco, so here we go : )

October 9, 2019  
That Wednesday was homecoming, but Seb wasn’t planning on going. As he walked in the doors of the rehearsal room for his one-on-one rehearsal with Carlos, he had to stop to catch his breath. He looked so good standing there looking down at his phone in his maroon sweater and bright yellow high tops.  
“Are you ready?” Carlos asked, putting his phone into one of the pockets of his cargo pants. Seb threw his bag onto the ground next to the chairs and spun around to look at Carlos. He took a deep breath and nodded. He could feel his palms grow sweaty with equals parts excitement and fear.  
“I know you can get the steps down, but I think we should work on your form,” Carlos suggested, taking a few steps towards the piano.  
“That would be good,” Seb agreed. Carlos pressed play on the speaker sitting on the piano and peppy salsa music filled the room.  
“C’mere,” Carlos said, approaching the middle of the wide, tile dance floor as Seb stood there frozen.  
Seb forced his legs across the room to meet him. His fears were eased a little bit by the million-dollar smile that Carlos gave him when they stood facing each other.  
“Put your hand here,” the choreographer directed, taking Seb’s right hand and wrapping it around his own waist. He scooped Seb closer with his embrace. Their left hands linked together, their elbows relaxed at their side. Again, Seb was overwhelmed by the softness of Carlos’s hand and the feel of his arm holding him tight. His heartbeat in double time, and he gave a nervous giggle. He was surprised to see the nervousness mirrored in Carlos’s own face when he allowed himself to look up from the floor.  
“There you go,” Carlos assured him with a smile. When he saw the fear in Seb’s eyes, he wiggled his eyebrows in concern. “Relax, I’ve got you,” he said, squeezing Seb’s hand. All of the thoughts of anything outside this moment washed away, leaving a moment of clarity for Seb. All he had to do was follow Carlos. He could do that.  
“Okay,” he breathed, relenting control.  
Carlos led him around the room so gracefully, it did not even seem like an effort for Seb to follow. The boys laughed as they whirled around the room, realizing how well they danced together. Seb was giddy with exhilaration. He only ever really felt like himself when he was dancing, and dancing with Carlos was a whole other level.  
Suddenly, the music changed and Seb realized something.  
“Is this- Bop to the Top?” he asked giggling, as he spun into Carlos.  
“Oh yeah,” Carlos laughed, pausing for a minute. “I didn’t even notice the song.” Either had Seb. He had been way too caught up in the moment.  
By the end of the hour, the boys were choreographing without speaking, dipping and spinning each other across the room. Seb forgot his nerves in his surprise at how much he had improved so fast.  
“That was awesome!” Seb exclaimed as the two boys collapsed into the chairs, exhausted and accomplished.  
“You were great, Sebby,” Carlos added, taking a drink of his water. “I feel like I barely had to teach you.” Seb blushed at the compliment. He couldn’t help but notice how Carlos was angled towards him in his seat.  
“I don’t get it,” Seb chuckled. “When I dance with you, it’s easy. When I dance with Ryan, I’ve got two left feet.” Carlos laughed at this like he didn’t quite believe it.  
“You’ve just got to drill it, Seb,” he suggested. Carlos was always talking about drilling dances. That wasn’t the problem, though. Seb could probably run through the choreography in his sleep.  
“I mean, I practice for like an hour every night in our barn,” Seb pointed out. “My parents think I’m bonding with the livestock,” he added to make Carlos laugh. Seb stood up to collect his things on that note. “I need more practice dancing with someone who actually knows how to lead,” he realized. Carlos stood up suddenly, seizing the opportunity.  
“Well, are you busy tonight?” he asked. Seb’s eyes widened in shock. He turned back around to face Carlos. Tonight was homecoming, right?  
“Tonight?” Seb replied, his voice cracking. Was Carlos suggesting what he thought?  
“Yeah, you know, homecoming…” The sentiment was casual but Carlos couldn’t hide the nervousness in his voice. There was a long pause as the two boys looked at each other with concern on their faces, although they were for different reasons.  
“You mean like, you and I? Dancing together? In front of all the non-theater kids?” The idea made Seb’s insides grow cold. It was one thing to dance with Carlos alone in the rehearsal room, but Seb worried he would feel incredibly out of place at homecoming. He hadn’t factored this into his plans for putting himself out there.  
“As far as I know, that’s how homecoming works.” Carlos had an immediate comeback. “This.. would be my first time going,” he added, his face falling as Seb turned back around. Suddenly, Seb realized that Carlos was worried Seb didn’t want to go with him, which couldn’t have been further from the truth. He shook his head to clear it. He was being stupid. Carlos. Just. Asked. Him. to. Homecoming. A smirk grew over Seb’s face as he zipped up his backpack.  
“Text me a pic of what you’re wearing,” Seb requested, flinging his bag over his shoulders and making eye contact with Carlos one last time before strolling out of the room. He broke out into a huge smile the second he hit the hall, practically bouncing towards the front doors. Tonight, he decided, he wasn’t going to care about what anyone else thought. He was going to own the dance floor with the boy of his dreams. 

“Carlos just asked me to homecoming tonight!” Seb squealed the second he opened the passenger door to his family’s minivan. His giddiness turned to surprise though when he realized it was Sabrina, not one of his parents, in the driver’s seat. She had never picked him up before. Seb looked over at her as he latched the seatbelt, his backpack on the ground between his legs.  
“That’s great, Seb,” she said distractedly, turning the key to start the ignition. Okay, something was definitely up. Where he would have expected her to be excited for him, asking for all the details, she only seemed sad.  
“Where’s Mom and Dad?” he asked worriedly as they pulled out of the parking lot.  
She sighed, her eyes filling with tears but her vision still firmly on the road. That was… really strange. A million possibilities ran through his head, all of them terrifying and awful.  
“I don’t want to tell you this, Seb,” she said after a minute, choking on her words, “since you’ve had such a good day and all…” She paused again, turning on her right turn signal. Seb winced with anticipation but he gave her a minute to collect herself.  
“Bessie is not doing well, Seb. We don’t think she’ll make it.” She grit her teeth to keep the dam from breaking so she wouldn’t cry any harder while trying to drive. Seb felt his heart plummet. Bessie the cow had been a part of the family for as long as he could remember. He wasn’t as close to her as Sabrina was, but he felt the pang of desperation all the same.  
“Oh Sabrina,” he breathed. “I’m so sorry.” He reached for Sabrina’s free hand and gave it a quick squeeze. She smiled the tiniest bit, and although there was sadness in her eyes, she relaxed a little bit.  
“Do- do we know how long she has?” Seb wondered gently, expecting to have at least until the morning to say his goodbyes.  
“Mom and Dad are still hopeful she’ll pull through,” Sabrina assured herself more than Seb. “But I think we’ll be up with her for most of the night.” Just like that, the glass wall Seb had built up between himself and the loss shattered. Most of the night. That meant he would miss homecoming.  
He opened his mouth to say that but suddenly stopped himself. He couldn’t put that on Sabrina when she was this distraught. He felt guilty that he cared more about homecoming at that moment than that their cow was dying. It seemed trivial to be sad at missing a dance he hadn’t even really wanted to go to in the first place. Hopefully, Carlos would understand. 

Seb threw his bag in the front door as soon as he got home and then raced to the barn. His whole family was huddled around poor Bessie. She was lying on the musty straw, her breathing heavy and her eyes struggling to stay open. Sarah was stroking the cows’ head, his sister’s usually fiery nature severely tampered down. Seb’s mom looked like she had already been crying for a while, and she broke out into tears again when Seb came and wrapped his arm around her. The Matthew-Smiths were silent for a long time, drawing on each other's strength. They didn’t know how long they had to say their goodbyes, and there wasn’t much they could do anyways.  
Suddenly, Seb’s stomach grumbled, breaking the silence. He winced, remembering that he hadn’t eaten since lunch and it was after five now.  
“I’m sorry,” he apologized quietly, looking down at his scuffed sneakers.  
“You can get something to eat, Seb,” his dad said gently.  
“Are you sure?” Seb asked guilty, and his dad nodded. Slowly, Seb extricated himself from his mom’s embrace and slipped out of the barn. 

His phone buzzed as he was making his way back to the barn, finishing his peanut butter and jelly sandwich. He didn’t need to look to know who it was.  
Sure enough, it was a picture of Carlos from the neck down looking amazing in his homecoming outfit. Seb’s heart dropped. He had forgotten to text Carlos! He shot off a quick text and shoved his phone back in his pocket as he re-joined his family.  
~ Hey, there’s a family emergency. I don’t think I can make it! ~  
~I’m so, so sorry~

A few bleary hours later, Bessie finally took her final breaths, escaping from her misery. Sabrina collapsed in an agonized groan.  
“Goodbye, Bessie,” Sam said, finally releasing all the tears he had been holding back. The family solemnly made their way back to the house arm in arm, leaving Seb’s dad to make the arrangements for burying their beloved cow. When they got through the front door and back into the reception zone, Seb’s phone buzzed again. He had a message from Carlos from an hour ago.  
~Hey Seb? You on your way? ~  
Crap. Crap. Crap. His text from earlier hadn't been sent cause the barn didn’t have service. Carlos was going to think he stood him up! He felt his face go white.  
“Who was that from?” His mom asked, holding herself together for the moment as she helped little Sophie out of her boots.  
“Carlos,” Seb choked, and Sabrina gasped.  
“Oh Seb, that’s right! You were supposed to go to homecoming!”  
“What?” his mom asked, caught off guard.  
“Carlos asked me to homecoming,” Seb confessed, “but I told him I couldn’t go because of everything-” His mom cut him off.  
“Nonsense!” She exclaimed. “It’s only 8:20 right now! What time does the dance end?”  
“I think 10,” Seb replied with confusion. He wasn’t seeing her point.  
“The night is still young! You deserve to have some fun after the day we’ve had. I think you and Sabrina should go!” Both of the high schoolers perked up, allowing themselves the first bit of hope of the day.  
“Let’s do it Seb!” Sabrina agreed, wiping her tears with her hoodie sleeves.  
“Really?” Seb asked, his heart pounding at the idea. He felt dizzy from the whiplash of emotions he’d felt in the last 5 hours.  
“Why not? Today has been weird enough,” Sabrina replied, reading his mind. “Go get ready, meet me down here in 20 minutes. I can make it to school by 9 if we speed!”  
“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that!” their mom called as she exited to the kitchen.  
“Let’s go meet your boy,” Sabrina urged, nudging Seb towards the stairs.  
“Okay, okay,” he flushed, scrunching up his face. Sabrina actually laughed for the first time that day, and Seb felt a sudden rush of affection for his sister.  
“Thank you, Sabrina.” He turned around and crushed her in a quick hug. He was surprised to find he was taller than her as she buried her wet, snotty face into his chest. He gave her squeeze and then let go, rushing up the stairs to pull together the fastest homecoming outfit in East High history. 

Seb flung open the car door and raced through the front doors as soon as Sabrina pulled up in front of the school. He flew down the hall to the gym, only stopping to buy his ticket from a bored-looking PTA mom who had been scrolling on her phone when he arrived. He stopped right outside the gym doors, taking a deep breath and adjusting his tie. He heard a song that had been popular on the radio a few years back playing faintly through the walls.  
Their drab gym had been transformed into a magical wonderland of lights and gauzy fabric. He took it all in with awe as he scanned the crowd for his date. His eyes were drawn upwards by the crowd of students gathered in the middle of the dance floor. His face broke into a huge smile as he found Carlos, lifted several feet in the air by all of his friends in a complicated figure of choreography. It was perfectly, dramatically fitting for Carlos. He had been worried he had ruined Carlos’s night, but he was in his element surrounded by the mob of dancers.  
The song ended, flowing into a slow, sappy ballad. The crowd dispersed and Ashlyn and Carlos were left in the middle of the dance floor. Seb didn’t want to intrude on their conversation, but he figured he had left Carlos waiting enough. It was now or never.  
As he started to make his way to Carlos, the other boy did a double-take, realizing Seb was there. He suddenly turned away from Ashlyn. The boys locked eyes, Carlos’s look so intense that Seb started to feel a little sweaty and weak in the knees.  
“Looks like I missed a lot,” Seb said abruptly when he stood in front of his date.  
“The dance started three hours ago.” Carlos looked justifiably upset, and Seb felt unworthy of him at that moment. And not just because he looked really good in his suit.  
“We lost one of our cows,” Seb explained. He knew it didn’t justify his actions, but Carlos deserved the truth: that there was no one else Seb would have rather spent homecoming night with.  
“You could have texted,” Carlos pointed out, which was a very fair point.  
“We have bad reception at the barn,” Seb reminded him gently. He hoped Carlos knew that he meant to text him at the very least. “I’m really sorry about being so late.” It wasn’t nearly enough of an apology, but it would have to do. The blinding lights, the warmth of the dancefloor, and intensity of Carlos’s stare all made him feel like he was under a spotlight, and for the first time ever he had stage fright.  
Carlos paused for a minute, and his next words surprised Seb.  
“I’m really sorry about your cow,” Carlos sympathized, the hurt in his eyes turning into understanding, and Seb’s heart swelled with adoration. Carlos was the most thoughtful person Seb had ever met- he had gotten stood up but he still apologized to Seb.  
“Hey,” Seb breathed. He took Carlos’s hands in his with an overwhelming surge of bravery. “At least our ties match.” Both boys chuckled at this. That was a miracle to celebrate after the night they had had. The tension dissipated between the boys and they remembered why they were there in the first place.  
Carlos led Seb towards the center of the dance floor, and he followed without complaint. He would do anything to make up for how he had treated this boy who had given him everything good he had this year, even slow dancing in the middle of the gym. And as Carlos wrapped his arm around him and they began to sway, Seb had to admit it felt really right.  
“You look amazing, by the way,” Carlos whispered, his eyes full of adoration, and Seb felt faint. All of this felt like a dream he had saved in the deepest parts of his heart. “I don’t know how you pulled together an outfit like that so fast.”  
“Thank you,” Seb flushed. “You look amazing too, ‘Los.”  
Carlos smirked. “‘Los? That’s a new nickname.”  
“You don’t like it?”  
“No, I kind of love it. No one’s ever called me that before.” Carlos’s eyes were wide with gratitude. “Seb, Los, it kind of fits.”  
“Seblos,” Seb realized out loud, and Carlos’s mouth widened in pleasant surprise.  
“I love that,” Carlos breathed, squeezing Seb’s shoulder. Seb relaxed, leaning forward to press his forehead against his date’s. He closed his eyes as Carlos pulled him even closer, logging this perfect moment into his memory forever. 

October 10, 2019  
Seb woke up with a chest full of warmth. The events of last night hit him as he blinked against the sunshine streaming in through his window. He wasn’t sure if it had been a dream or not until he glanced over at his screen and realized he had a text from Carlos. He clumsily unplugged his phone from the charger and brought it close to his face so he could read the message.  
~ I had an amazing time last night ~  
Seb grinned, the tips of ears turning pink. He was lying on his stomach, his face mushed into his pillow to keep him from squealing. He kept replaying the way Carlos looked up at him during the slow dances and the feel of their chests pressed against each other. He ran a hand through his messy bed-head hair, deliberating on his response.  
~ Me too. The night turned out so much better than I could’ve ever hoped. ~  
The second Seb sent his reply, the three dots appeared, showing that Carlos was already typing back. Seb was surprised he was up this early since he had never known Carlos to be a morning person. Although, it was much later than Seb usually woke up. His parents had let him sleep in. Seb twiddled his thumbs over his screen as he watched the dots appear and disappear several times. He unraveled himself from the woolen covers to sit on the edge of the bed. The anticipation was killing him. What had Carlos been going to send? Yesterday had been so crazy that Seb hadn’t had time to freak out about where he stood with Carlos. Now, though, their energy felt so different. Seb had felt sure at one point last night that Carlos had wanted to kiss him. Friends didn’t do that, right?  
The screen flashed, breaking Seb’s train of thought.  
~ yeah, it really did ~  
Somehow, Seb had hoped for more than that. He couldn’t blame Carlos for feeling awkward though. He completely understood. Before Seb could reply, another message popped up.  
~ you’re a really good slow dancer ~  
This took Seb’s breath away. There was the fearless Carlos from last night.  
~ I learned from the best ~  
Seb typed, adding a winky face. As he hit send he gasped so fast it released all the air from his lungs. Wow, he really said that. Maybe he would like this new flirty version of himself after all.  
~ Oh really? Who would that be? ~  
Carlos played along. Seb laughed at Carlos’s plea for validation. He kind of loved that it sounded just a little possessive.  
~ Oh, just a friend….Apparently, he’s fishing for compliments. ~  
Seb purposely teased to rile Carlos up. He could imagine the smirk on his face and he wondered if Carlos was also sitting on his bed right now.  
~ Ah, can you blame him? ~ Carlos defended himself.  
Seb swore his heart stopped for a split second. He couldn’t help but bite back a gigantic smile. Even over text, Carlos was too adorable when he was flustered. It was way too early in the day for him to be playing with Seb’s heart like this.  
~ No, I guess not ~ Seb admitted. Carlos sent back a smiley emoji, leading to a momentary pause for a change in the subject.  
~ I’m sure he would appreciate if you practiced your dances over the weekend ~  
Seb groaned at Carlos’s persistence. He was less annoyed though than admiring of Carlos’s dedication to the show.  
~ You’re such a nerd ~  
~ I miss you too ~  
Carlos replied without hesitation, accurately picking on Seb’s affectionate tone. Seb did miss Carlos already, he realized, so much it made his heart hurt. How was he going to survive until Monday without seeing him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't updated on this story in a while- I got a little distracted. I have the next couple of parts already written though, so I'm planning on finishing A.S.A.P : ) Thanks for sticking with me- comments and kudos are greatly appreciated!
> 
> (I hope you like the mini bonus scene afterward too xD )


	6. I'm Just Wondering (ep. 6)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode 6 of High School Musical, the Musical: The Series from Seb's perspective. The last few scenes take place well after episode 6, but there's a big time gap before episode 7 so I wanted to fill it in a little bit. There's the Miss Jenn school board drama, some sibling time for Seb, seeing Gina at a Halloween carnival, and a Saturday rehearsal where they play hide and seek!!

October 14, 2019  
Seb bounced down to the auditorium when he got to school that morning, eager to see Carlos. They had had Thursday and Friday after homecoming off for parent-teacher conferences, so they hadn’t seen each other in four long days. Sure, they had texted on and off all weekend, but only about safe, everyday things. They hadn’t talked about how flirty they were with each other now, and Seb worried that it would be awkward to see him in person.   
“Seb!” Kourtney called him over cheerfully as soon as he stepped into the dressing room. It was picture day, and the costume and make-up crew was here to help them get ready. Even if Carlos was down here already, Seb had at least a few more minutes until he could talk to him. He didn’t know if he felt more annoyed or relieved about that. Seb smiled at the make-up guru as he made his way over to her.   
He slid his backpack under the counter, sitting down in one of the chairs at Kourtney’s urging. He scooted the chair to face her. The metal legs slid noisily against the tile floor.   
“I’m going to try a look I found online. Is that okay? We can obviously tweak it before the show.” Seb nodded at Kourtney’s question. He appreciated her asking for his feedback. Even though he knew he had no reason to be nervous, he couldn’t help but be self-conscious about the fact that he was the only guy wearing extensive make-up in the show. He had signed up to play Sharpay though, and that meant embracing all the glitter that came with it. He was glad Kourtney was here to help him because he had never worn make-up before. He wouldn’t even know where to start, but he had seen some of Kourtney’s tutorials on Instagram and knew that she had an obvious talent for it.   
They were quiet as Kourtney worked. She was concentrating very hard, looking back and forth between the image on her phone and Seb’s face. Seb tried not to squirm and make any sudden movements, but it was hard to not feel uncomfortable with all the poking and brushing. He wasn’t even able to see what she was doing most of the time because he had to keep his eyes closed. Finally, he heard Kourtney set her brush down on the counter.   
“Okay, I think we’re done now,” she announced. “You can look in the mirror and tell me what you think.” Seb opened his eyes slowly and lifted his head up towards the mirror. He gasped when he saw his reflection gaping back at him. He was a totally different person! He looked… like a better, more put-together version of himself. He had never realized how much magic there was in make-up.   
“Do you like it?” Kourtney asked nervously. Seb nodded, his mouth agape in a loss of words. Kourtney smiled when she read the awe on his face.   
Seb was still in shock as he got up from the chair and made his way over to the costume rack. He was one of the last ones left in the room, so he knew he had to hurry up to the stage as fast as possible. He found his costume at the end of the rack and he almost started to cry. This was the first time that the reality of playing his favorite character of all time was truly coming to life.   
He ran his hands down the sequined vest as he slipped it off the hanger. Quickly, he peeled down to his undershirt and boxer shorts and transformed with the power of costume. He looked down at the ground as he buttoned the very tight pants and gasped again when he saw the shoes with his name on them. He was definitely going to trip in those heels!   
With much re-adjusting, he finally clasped them and stood up in them. Each step got less wobbly as he followed EJ out the door and into the wings.   
Seb peeked around the velvety curtain. He smiled when he saw Carlos standing in the middle of the stage. He was giving orders, but he looked so happy and relaxed. Carlos had come a long way in only a month to gain the respect and friendship of the entire cast.   
Seb made his way on shaky legs towards the middle of the action. As if he sensed he was there, Carlos turned towards him and smiled.   
“Hey, are you okay with this?” Carlos asked nervously when Seb stood in front of him. Seb had mentioned he was anxious for the photoshoot over text that weekend. He hadn’t expected Carlos to remember or sympathize with that fact though.   
“I don’t know how to say it..” Seb replied honestly through gritted teeth. Honestly, he was still kind of speechless. Carlos nodded, his eyes wide and caring.   
“Just say it,” he urged. Carlos was right. There was no reason to hold anything back from each other now. They had to support each other. Seb smiled, the words coming to him a flash.   
“I’m home,” he whispered, leaning in towards Carlos. Carlos chuckled, placing his hand on Seb’s shoulder. Seb had been worried that the Sharpay get-up would make him feel like an extra limb: out of place and unnatural. Instead, he realized as he looked around that he did stick out, but that wasn’t a bad thing. He had never felt like he was a crucial part of anything before. But he had a whole new family now who were counting on him, and they were doing something that truly mattered. It was freeing to feel like he was tapping into a whole other side of him that was yet to be discovered. 

The pictures could have gone more smoothly, Seb had to admit. Getting everyone to jump at the same time was nearly impossible, and Seb was pretty sure he had already broken off part of a heel. But by the time they had to leave to take everything off before class, Big Red had assured everyone he had gotten a decent enough re-creation of the iconic jumping shot. Seb kept finding glitter in his hair all day, and it made him smile every time to know he carried a part of Sharpay with him now wherever he went. 

Five minutes into their rehearsal time after school, Seb pulled out his phone to text Carlos. They hadn’t started yet, and no one had heard from him since the photoshoot that morning. He looked up from his spot behind the piano to see Nini approaching.   
“Hey Seb,” she grinned, leaning over the piano.   
“Hey Nini,” Seb replied, sliding his phone into his pocket. “How are you?” He hadn’t seen her at homecoming, and they hadn’t really talked since the whole “What I’ve Been Looking For” fiasco.   
“I’m fine,” she said. She seemed bubbly, so Seb didn’t press her even though he figured that wasn’t probably the whole truth. “How are you?” she asked, and Seb sighed.   
“Confused.” He ran a hand through his hair and slumped down onto the piano bench. The keys poked into his back. “The photoshoot was weird...and I think that we should have started rehearsal by now.” The events of the past few days had not just muddled his feelings surrounding playing Sharpay, but also his relationship with Carlos. The photoshoot hadn’t clarified either. Seb wasn’t sure how much of it he should get into with Nini.   
“Yeah, I feel you.” Nini sighed thoughtfully, her cheeks puffing. She sauntered over to Seb and he scooted over to make room for her on the bench. “Everything feels kind of different now.” Seb nodded. She had put his thoughts into words. He was about to respond when Natalie sidled over to them.   
“Has anyone heard from Miss Jenn or Carlos?” she asked them anxiously. Nini shook her head and Seb pulled out his phone. No new messages. A pit of unease grew in his stomach. Had Seb done something to offend him?  
“It’s weird. He’s not responding to texts,” Seb worried. Natalie shook her head in disappointment. Seb was confused about why she had asked him until he remembered what Ashlyn said about Carlos being picky about who he texted.   
“You guys are texting?” Nini asked delightedly as the stage manager walked away. Seb blushed. Why was everyone making a big deal of this?   
“Yeah, but it’s not that big of a deal,” Seb mumbled, looking down at the ground. Nini giggled.   
“Okay, but I’ve seen the looks you guys have been giving each other at rehearsal,” she teased.   
“What? What looks?” Seb’s voice was suddenly very high pitched. He hadn’t realized other people had noticed. He guessed now that they had gone to homecoming together though the cast was bound to pay attention.. “I didn’t realize it was that obvious.”   
“No, I think it was just because I’ve been making more of an effort to hang out with you since the day in the storage room. Although I’m sad I missed you guys at homecoming,” Nini said. Seb smiled, letting down his guard a little bit. He thought that Nini might just have been trying to make him feel better, but it worked anyway.   
“It would have been fun to have you there,” he agreed. “But I know you were dealing with your own stuff.”   
“That’s a bit of an understatement,” Nini laughed. At least she was in good humor about it.   
“I’m really sorry about how that all turned out,” Seb apologized. The drama still weighed heavily on him.   
“Oh, no, Seb, don’t feel like it was all your fault!” Nini exclaimed, looking into Seb’s eyes. “Honestly… I think it turned out for the better. I’m done with boys.” She smirked then, her eyes lighting up with excitement. “I can help you get with yours though!” Seb groaned, his face turning bright red. Why were all of his friends so boy-crazy? Thankfully, he was saved from answering by Natalie speaking up for everyone’s attention.   
“Guys, let’s just start,” Natalie decided. “Flip to When There Was Me and You in your scripts.” Everyone, including Natalie herself, seemed hesitant to start though.   
“Uh, should we maybe wait until Miss Jenn gets here?” Ashlyn asked.   
“Well, I don’t know, apparently no one’s in charge.” Natalie was clearly exasperated. As soon as the words were out of her mouth though, a familiar voice joined the melee.   
“Okay people, let’s stage a number!” Carlos announced as he strolled into the room. Seb felt his face light up in spite of himself. “I’m late,” Carlos added with a nervous chuckle.   
“Is Miss Jenn coming?” Nini asked. Seb didn’t really think it mattered if Miss Jenn was here or not. He had ultimate faith in Carlos’s ability to lead a rehearsal. He supposed it would be less stressful for Carlos though if she did show up and would give him time to actually talk to Seb.   
“Miss Jenn had a small personal matter to attend to and won’t be here today,” Carlos replied professionally. Seb’s shoulders slumped in disappointment. He had all-business, distracted Carlos today, not flirty, paying-attention-to-Seb Carlos. Seb knew this wasn’t about him, but it still made him frustrated all the same.   
“Oh is everything all right?” Nini asked.   
“Good question,” Seb smirked. It would have been nice to know where Carlos had been. Not that he was jealous. Okay, he was, but Carlos was acting pretty suspicious.   
“Everything’s fine,” Carlos chuckled calmly. “Why would you even ask that?” He turned to the rest of the room, and Seb realized the rest of the cast was there, watching this exchange silently. Seb blushed a little and shrank back as much as he could. The way Carlos had brushed it off was not convincing though, and Seb and Nini turned their heads slowly to share suspicious looks. Carlos started directing people around, eager to start. He must have had a clear vision of what he wanted, but Seb wasn’t seeing it. Apparently, all of the guys, except him, were going to be in the song that was supposed to be Nini’s big solo moment.   
“Uh, are they going to be on stage with me as I’m singing?” Nini asked, echoing Seb’s thoughts.   
“Yes, they will be frozen in various positions to come,” Carlos replied with conviction. “As the ballad builds, Nini, you will be wandering through a forest of boys.”   
Seb had to hold himself back from laughing. Carlos’s big idea for this scene was to add a bunch of attractive boys in the background! Seb couldn’t blame him for that though, especially since it was so cute. Nini didn’t get it though, and Carlos tried his best to explain his reasoning to her. “Because your heart has just been shattered, and you can’t stop thinking about how amazing Troy is.” Seb sensed that maybe Carlos related a little more to this scene than he was letting on. He’d obviously imagined himself in Gabriella’s place. Carlos stepped back, stopping himself from digging himself further into a whole “Let’s go,” he said enthusiastically, pointing at Seb as he passed by. Seb started to play, but apparently, Nini still didn’t understand.   
“Uh no, I’m sorry,” she protested, halting the song in its tracks. “But at this point in the show, Troy just sold me out to his teammates.”   
“Well, she’s got a point. What Troy did was kind of unforgivable,” Ashlyn added. This sparked a further discussion, where everyone, especially the girls, began to veto Carlos’s idea for other ones. Seb could tell Carlos was on the verge of another panic attack like the one he had that first week of rehearsals. Why was everyone being so unfair? It might not have been the smoothest idea, but Carlos deserved more respect than this. There was the drama with Miss Jenn after all, and Seb could tell it was weighing on him more than he was letting on.   
“Okay, you guys, this is not a democracy,” Carlos cried, finally standing up for himself. Immediately, the chatter stopped. Everyone looked over at him with shocked expressions, realizing how desperate Carlos was.   
“Carlos, are you okay?” Nini asked softly, making her way across the room towards Carlos. “‘Cause it’s not that deep, we can always just come back when Miss Jenn gets here.”   
Carlos was not amused by this. He wasn’t angled toward Seb, but he could still sense panic in Carlos’s eyes. “Well, she’s not here, and I don’t know if she’s ever coming back,” he retorted. The air seemed to escape from the room at these words. Miss Jenn was in danger? Everyone looked around at each other with concerned expressions.   
“What?” Ricky blinked.   
“Is this a joke?” Ashlyn asked  
“She’s in deep trouble you guys,” Carlos admitted. Everyone who was still seated began to stand up, hanging on his every word. “They’re saying she lied on her job application. There’s a school board meeting in less than 24 hours and she’s probably going to lose her job.” Seb’s hands clenched the piano bench as he processed this. Everyone seemed to be in various stages of shock. “I wasn’t supposed to tell any of you, but I’m trying to do my best here,” he pleaded.   
“I can’t believe this,” Nini muttered under her breath, re-joining Seb on the piano bench.   
“What are we even doing in rehearsal?” EJ asked, wanting to jump up to action.   
“Wait, how can we do a show if we don’t even have a teacher?” Ashlyn wondered, ever practical. Carlos opened his mouth to sigh, but he was at a loss for words.  
“You know you could have told me,” Seb leaned forward, speaking to Carlos gently. He thought Carlos knew he could come to Seb. This definitely wasn’t the first time Seb had been able to calm him down, and it wasn’t even the first time Carlos had reached out for help.   
“Miss Jenn asked me not to,” Carlos apologized, his eyes wide with regret. Seb supposed he could respect that, but he was frustrated that circumstances kept muddling their communication.   
“Wow, Carlos, what else aren’t you telling us?” EJ asked sarcastically, and Seb winced.   
“Hey, let’s all breathe for a second,” Ashlyn suggested, her motherly instincts taking over.   
“You know what? I… uh... need a second,” Nini announced, grabbing her backpack and escaping the room before further argument could ensue. Everyone started to follow her lead despite Natalie’s protests. Carlos just stood there in the middle of the room, looking dejected. Seb didn’t think he should get in the middle of it though, so he started frantically packing up his things before he could think the better of it. He followed the rest of the cast out the door. He thought he heard Carlos shout something from inside the bunker, but he couldn’t make out the words. 

Seb had slipped into the restroom when he left rehearsal to kill some time before his ride got there. He was washing his hands when he heard the door fly open. His heart started pumping when he turned around to see Carlos frozen in the doorway, a shocked look on his face. Seb panicked when Carlos turned around to leave again.   
“Carlos!” He called around the corner to Carlos’s retreating figure as he ripped off a piece of paper towel to dry his hands. “Please come back.” Carlos sighed, turning around back around slowly. His shoulders were tense and his eyes were heavy as he hesitantly stepped towards Seb. Seb crumpled up the used paper towel and dropped it into the garbage can next to him.   
“Aren’t you mad at me?” Carlos asked, looking down at the floor. A look of puzzlement crossed over Seb’s face.   
“Of course not! Why would I be mad at you?” Seb replied quickly. Carlos' shoulders relaxed imperceptively. “I was just worried about you. Still am.” Seb placed his hand on Carlos’s shoulder. Carlos’s eyes began to fill with tears. “Oh ‘Los,” Seb breathed. He hesitated for a moment, wondering if it would be appropriate to hug Carlos. At this point though, Seb didn’t think it mattered. Before he could think better of it, he flung his arms around Carlos and pulled him close. He slapped him on the back awkwardly a few times before releasing him. Carlos’s face was not only sad now, but stunned as well. “Talk to me, please?” Seb begged.   
“I’m so sorry, Seb. I totally ghosted you today. I feel like such an awful person right now.” Carlos was shaking slightly, and Seb took his hands to steady them.   
“Are you serious? Please, Carlos, just give yourself a break. Here, breathe with me, okay?” When Seb had had bad anxiety in middle school, he had taught himself to breathe when he was stressed. He hoped the same techniques would help Carlos now. Carlos slowly looked up, and Seb nodded when they finally made eye contact to show that he was there for him. Slowly, Seb led Carlos as they took several deep breaths in and out, staring into each other's eyes for comfort. The color gradually returned to Carlos’s face, and their intertwined fingers slipped apart as his body relaxed.   
“Is that better?” Seb asked, and Carlos nodded.   
“I just hate that you had to see me like this,” he admitted, sniffling back the tears that were no longer threatening to fall.   
“You’re my best friend, Carlos. Nothing is going to stop me from wanting to be around you.” Both boys stiffened at these words. Seb’s first instinct was to want to shove them back in his throat, but Carlos’s face broke out into a smirk.   
“What did you call me?” he asked, and Seb blushed.   
“My best friend,” he mumbled, and Carlos laughed.   
“You’re my favorite person, Seb. I always want to be around you too.” Carlos’s voice was soft as he reached for Seb’s hands again. Seb grinned dopily at the compliment. It was his turn to feel dizzy now. “You’ve saved me now more times than I can count, even when you didn’t need to.”   
“Consider it repentance for standing you up at the dance,” Seb suggested, and Carlos chuckled again.   
“I’ve already forgotten about that,” Carlos realized. “Well, most of it.” Carlos’s eyes got kind of a glassy, dreamy look, and Seb blushed. He was well aware that they were still holding hands. He squeezed them once and then let go, worried that his palms were super sweaty. This kind of broke the spell, and Carlos looked up at Seb worriedly again. “Miss Jenn left me in charge,” he said, “but I don’t think I can handle it.”   
“You don’t have to carry this alone. We’re all here for you.”   
“I know,” Carlos conceded, looking down at the floor. “I just don’t know what I’m going to do about it.”   
“What are you going to do about it?” Seb questioned out of curiosity. Suddenly, it seemed as if a lightbulb went off in Carlos’s head.   
“Sebby, you’re a genius!” he shrieked. Seb craned his head back in bafflement.   
“I am?” he asked, genuinely confused, and Carlos laughed.   
“Yeah, Sebby, I think I know what I can do,” Carlos announced, pulling his phone out of his pocket.   
“Oh.. okay,” Seb mumbled, scooping up his backpack from the floor. He followed Carlos out the door. The choreographer was moving with purpose, obviously re-invigorated. They paused once they got to the center of the hallway, realizing they had to go in separate directions.   
“I’ll text you tonight. I promise,” Carlos assured Seb.   
“Sounds good,” Seb grinned. There was an awkward pause before Carlos began backing up, waving goodbye to Seb. Seb watched him turn around and puff up his shoulders before he pivoted towards the front doors to try and escape the craziness inside the building. 

Seb’s mom drove him home, but if she could sense something was off she didn’t say anything. Seb turned on his data to check on his classmates as they zoomed down the highway. He was confused to see that he had a text from Ashlyn. He and Ashlyn had been texting quite a bit as they became closer friends, so he wasn’t exactly surprised that she had texted him. It was more the contents of the text that puzzled him.   
~ Hey, are you coming to Big Red’s tonight ~   
~ What? ~ Seb texted back. He hadn’t heard anything about being invited to Big Red’s house.   
~ Apparently a few of us are hanging out there this evening. Are you down? ~   
Seb thought about it for a minute. He was in a really weird mood. A part of him wanted to be alone, but another part of him thought it might be a good idea to have the comfort of the cast’s companionship. He had spent far too long regulating himself to social life on the outskirts. Something told him he wouldn’t want to miss this opportunity.   
~ Sounds fun. I’ll just have to double-check with my mom real quick. ~   
“Hey Mom,” Seb asked, looking up from his phone.   
“Um-hum?” his mom mumbled, making eye contact with him in the rearview mirror.   
“Some of the theater kids are hanging out later today, is it okay if I go?”   
“Who’s all going?” his mom, quirking her eyebrows. Her gentle smile was encouraging, but not a definite yes.   
“Ummm... I’m not sure. Big Red and Ashlyn for sure. It sounds pretty chill.” His mom nodded.   
“Carlos?” she asked pointedly, and Seb blushed.   
“Hopefully,” Seb grumbled, and she laughed.   
“Where is it?”   
“Big Red’s. I think he lives pretty close to the skatepark.”   
“Okay, I’ll take you after dinner,” his mom offered, and Seb breathed a sigh of relief.   
“Thanks, Mom, you’re the best.” Seb leaned over to kiss his mom on the cheek, which delighted her to no end.   
“Of course. You’re a good kid, Seb. I’m trusting you.” Seb thought he sensed a veiled warning in the last phrase, but he was too excited to care. He eagerly unlocked his phone to text Ash.   
~ I’m in. My mom will bring me probably around 6:30 ~   
~ Yay! I’m sure Big Red will be glad to see you ~ Seb smiled. He hoped that was true.   
~ Oh, and Seb? ~   
~ Yeah? ~   
~ Text Carlos please and let him know. You’re stilll the only one he responds to. ~  
Seb kept himself from groaning, burying his face in his arms to hide his blush. Of course, he still texted Carlos anyways. 

Seb was greeted with warm welcomes as he padded down the wooden stairs to Big Red’s basement. It seemed like almost the entire cast was there! He scanned the smiling faces for a certain one, but he wasn’t there yet. Seb’s shoulders slumped as he settled himself on the couch next to Ashlyn. She smiled at him, and he pulled out his phone.   
~ Hey are you on your way?” he asked Carlos. Almost immediately, he got a reply.   
~ Yeah, I’ll be there in a few. Just got done talking with Miss Jenn.~   
Seb couldn’t tell over text if that was a good or bad thing.   
~ How did it go?~ he asked, crossing his fingers.   
~ Not well at all ~ Carlos replied bluntly, and Seb felt his heart drop.   
~ I’m so sorry ~ he sympathized.   
Seb’s surge of panic was broken when he looked up to see Ashlyn’s smirk. He blushed once again.   
“I guess I don’t have to ask who you were texting,” she deadpanned. Seb rolled his eyes.   
“You were the one who told me to text him,” Seb protested over the chatter. Ashlyn smiled at the flustered look on his face.   
“I know,” she conceded. “Is he coming?” Seb nodded.   
“He’s on his way. He’ll be here in a few minutes.” Seb and Ashlyn spent the next few minutes talking. Apparently, it was sort of Ashlyn’s fault that everyone ended up here. She hadn’t realized that Big Red had only invited her and a few other people. Seb was surprised how many people had shown up on such short notice. Then again, if they all felt like he did, they were pretty lost indeed.   
On one of his many glances at the stairway, Seb finally spotted the face he was looking for. Carlos was bobbing down the stairs, but he seemed to be carrying around a prickly air of foreboding.   
“Hey,” Carlos breathed, standing on the landing. Ashlyn turned away to talk to E.J., pretending like she wasn’t there. Seb was closest to the stairs, so Carlos slid onto the armrest next to him. Their legs brushed up against one another. Seb worried Carlos could hear his heart racing in his chest, but he tried to play it cool because he knew Carlos needed him right now.   
“Hey.” Seb gave a half-smile. “Do you want to talk about it?” He didn’t know what went down with Miss Jenn, and he didn’t want to pry if it wasn’t his business, but he thought he might as well give Carlos the chance to vent if he needed to.   
“Honestly? Not really,” Carlos chuckled nervously. “But thanks for asking.” He glanced over at Seb for a moment but turned away before his face grew too sad again.   
The next few moments passed in a heavy, awkward whisper. Carlos was spaced out, his eyes focused forward but clearly lost in thought. Seb didn’t want to disturb him, so he just sat with Carlos in his grief. Finally, Natalie broke the silence, if only to complain.   
“This is a terrible party. There aren’t even pretzels,” she quipped. Seb was taken aback. He hadn’t really been thinking of this as a party. “What are we all doing here?”   
“We all ended up in the same basement after a really bad day,” Ashlyn explained. She had pushed herself up against the wall to sit on the top of the couch, so she was higher than anyone else in the room. That kind of spoke to the leadership role Ashlyn had taken on in the group. She might have been a sophomore and not one to actively seek power, but she commanded respect wherever she went. “So someone should say something,” she suggested. Carlos suddenly broke away from his solitary contemplation.   
“Fine, I’ll say something,” he grumbled, surprising Seb. “I’m mad at Miss Jenn.”   
“Why?” scoffed Gina, who was sitting on the floor across the room. “Just because she has a couple skeletons in her closet?”   
“No. Because she’s giving up,” Carlos defended his position. He looked down at Gina, expressing all of his frustration through the look in his eyes. “She was the first teacher to not see me as a punchline, and now she’s not even a real teacher?”   
“Define real teacher,” Ashlyn gibed.   
“He’s got a point,” Kourtney admitted.   
“Does he though?” Natalie countered.   
“Guys,” Big Red admonished, halting their bickering.   
“So why are we all here then?” Natalie queried quite bitterly.   
“Yeah, good question. This is a waste of time,” EJ complained.   
“Honestly… because she gave me a shot,” Carlos said, ignoring EJ’s comment. “And it’s been a long time since someone gave me a shot.”   
“Yeah,” Seb breathed in understanding, placing his hand on Carlos’s knee. He was really glad Carlos was talking about this. They had touched on it briefly, but he suspected it weighed on Carlos heavily, and that made Seb really sad. He knew how much a chance like this show meant to both of them. They had a family now that would drop everything for them.   
“She gave me a voice,” Nini put in, and Seb smiled. He was really glad Miss Jenn had taken a chance on Nini too.   
“Yeah, and now no one’s gonna get to hear it because Miss Jenn screwed up,” Kourtney said, backing up her girl.   
“Okay, does anyone here actually care if her past is a little bit sketchy?” Ashlyn asked, bringing up a point no one had thought of yet. Everyone looked around the room, waiting for a response. “Anyone?” Ashlyn provoked.   
“I do,” Ricky sighed, leaning back in his chair. Seb paused in surprise at this. Ricky had been quiet this whole night. He was the last one Seb expected to have high expectations for Miss Jenn.   
“Seriously dude,” Big Red called out his best friend  
“What, because you live some perfect life?” Kourtney criticized.   
“No, not all.” Ricky stood up from his chair, crossing around it to stand in the middle of the circle. “Because she put our show in jeopardy. And now we’re all here, maybe for the last time, together.” Ricky’s passion was met with various reactions around the room. Seb was in shock that Ricky seemed so genuinely upset about the show ending, and it didn’t seem to be because of the Nini drama. Had Ricky actually come to enjoy theater? Maybe Seb should’ve given him more credit. There was a pause before Ricky continued. “And for some of us, this has become…. I don’t know…”   
“Family,” Nini finished the thought.   
“What team?” Ricky asked quietly.   
“Wildcats,” everyone whispered together.   
“Okay wildcats, so what are we going to do about it?” Ashlyn asked.

Seb wasn’t actually sure whose idea it was to write a song, but they spent the next several hours doing exactly that. Ashlyn, Nini, and Kourtney bounced lyrics off of Ricky as he riffed on the guitar. Carlos and Gina huddled together, planning out choreography. Seb eventually found Big Red’s keyboard, but he spent more time just writing down notes than truly playing. There was an excited buzz in the air as everyone settled into their roles. The plan was to show up to the school board meeting tomorrow after school and perform the song in front of all the members. It was extremely nerve-wracking, and a part of Seb was worried that it wouldn’t work. The entire cast was on board, though, and that had to count for something.   
Seb was having so much fun that he hadn’t realized how much time had passed. It was around 11, and he saw he had a text from his mom asking when he was going to be home. He hit the button to call her as he walked over to the corner for some quiet.   
“Hey Mom,” Seb said when she picked up.   
“Hey bub, are you about ready for me to pick you up?”   
“Actually… do you think I could spend the night here?” They still had a lot of work to do and not a lot of time to do it. It looked like they were in it for the long haul. There was a long pause as his mom thought about it.   
“As long as it’s okay with Big Red. Are his parents home?”   
Seb sighed in relief. He was so glad his mom trusted him.   
“Yes,” he assured her. Big Red’s parents had come down just a little bit ago to say goodnight. Hopefully, they weren’t keeping them up.   
“Okay, I’ll have Sabrina bring over a change of clothes on the way to school in the morning.”   
“Thanks, Mom, you’re the best!” Seb sighed with gratuity.   
“Be safe. Have fun. I love you!”  
“I love you too, Mom!” He ended the call, a huge smile on his face. He would probably fall asleep in his classes tomorrow, but it would be worth it. For once, pettiness and animosity didn’t exist in the cast. Seb felt like he could have a conversation with anyone.   
He looked around, but everyone was already paired up. He felt slightly uncomfortable as his eyes drifted to somewhere he could join in. His eyes landed on Ricky, who was sitting off the corner of the basement by himself staring glassy-eyed at his phone. Maybe it was his unexpected urge to talk to him, but Seb thought he looked a little lonely.   
“Hey,” Seb smiled as he sat down next to Ricky. Almost out of instinct, he leaned against the wall and tucked his legs into his chest. Ricky looked up, taking a second to get his bearings.   
“Hey Seb,” he said, placing his phone on the ground next to him. He was smiling, but Seb could tell it was plastered over a deep sadness. Something must have been going on in Ricky’s personal life, and he didn’t think it had to do with the show or even Nini.   
“I just wanted to say that I really appreciated your speech earlier,” Seb blurted. “I think I judged you too harshly at first, but you’ve really stepped it up as the leading man.” Ricky looked pleasantly surprised at these words, but he quickly shook them off.   
“No, I don’t deserve the credit as the leading man,” he moped. “That’s all you.” Seb was shocked at this, both because he hadn’t expected Ricky to be so complimentary, and because he hadn’t ever thought of himself as a leading man.   
“I don’t- I mean- you…” Seb stammered, but Ricky cut him off.   
“I’m serious, man,” he said with the greatest humility. “You just go and put your whole heart out there. I…. have troubles with that.” Ricky looked away, and Seb saw several painful memories flash through his eyes.   
“Hey, are you okay?” Seb asked gently before Ricky could retreat back into his shell. He placed a hand on Ricky’s shoulder. The curly-haired boy’s shoulders noticeably relaxed. He took a deep breath as he looked up at Seb gratefully.   
“Umm… not really,” Ricky admitted. He paused for a minute to see if Seb was actually listening. He seemed to decide it was worth getting into it because he continued. “My parents are splitting up. My mom’s moving to Chicago.” A shiver ran down Seb’s back at the numbness in Ricky’s voice. Seb squeezed his shoulder. He had never dealt with that type of thing personally, but he could at least listen to Ricky.   
“I’m sorry,” Seb sympathized. No wonder Ricky had been so off in rehearsals lately. On top of everything with the show, Ricky was in the middle of his own crisis. Seb vowed that he would try to be a better friend to him from now on.   
“Thanks, man,” Ricky smiled as if he understood the gravity behind Seb’s condolences. He lowered his voice further. “No one else has noticed. Or cared to ask. I would normally talk to Nini about this, but…”   
“You aren’t on the best terms right now,” Seb finished, and Ricky nodded. Seb was kind of surprised that he and Nini talked about that stuff. He had always assumed their relationship to be pretty superficial. “Were you guys friends before you started dating? I mean, if you don’t mind talking about it.”   
“No, no, it’s fine,” Ricky insisted. To Seb’s first question, he explained: “We’ve known each other since kindergarten.”  
“Wow,” Seb breathed. He didn’t really remember anyone from kindergarten, and he certainly hadn’t realized Ricky and Nini had that much history. “How did guys start dating? Like, how did you know?” His curiosity got the better of him. Ricky raised his eyebrows in suspicion.   
“Are you asking me for advice on how to get a girlfriend?” he asked, half-jokingly. Seb mouth widened a little in shock though as he realized he wasn’t joking. He had been asking Ricky for advice. Not about a girl, but Ricky’s input would still be helpful.   
“Umm..” Seb faltered, not sure how to explain his feelings to Ricky. His eyes betrayed him though by sliding over the staircase where Carlos was deep in discussion with Gina.   
“Oh, right,” Ricky laughed in realization, running a hand through his hair. “You and Carlos.” His tone wasn’t judgemental at all, and Seb took a deep sigh of relief.   
“Yeah,” Seb breathed dreamily, watching Carlos’s dimples from a distance. “I really like him, Ricky.” He looked over at Ricky, a pleading look in his eyes. If he couldn’t help him sort out his confusing relationship with Carlos, Seb didn’t think anyone could. Ricky smiled, but thankfully he didn’t comment on how lovestruck Seb was.   
“It doesn’t have to be complicated. Just..throw the idea of a date out there and see how he reacts,” Ricky suggested. Seb nodded off into the distance, fiddling with the collar of the shirt. That was good advice, but the idea still made his skin feel hot. “And Seb?” Seb turned back to look at him. “I think he really likes you too if that’s any consolation.” Seb blushed. That was something he could desperately believe.   
“Thank you,” Seb replied, pushing himself up onto his feet. “I know this was kind of weird, cause we never talk.”   
“Anytime, Seb. I mean it.” Ricky called out. Seb turned back and smiled once before returning to the middle of the action. Somehow, he felt a lot better. There was a kind of buoyancy in his chest and he thought he just might have to take Ricky up on that offer. 

November 15, 2019  
Seb thought he would be tired the next day, but had so much adrenaline coursing through him that he actually felt quite exhilarated. Around 1 in the morning, most of the cast members had started to trickle home. It ended up being just Ricky, Carlos, and Seb who had spent the night at Big Red’s. Seb had curled up on a sleeping bag in the corner around 3 in the morning. Carlos had insisted on staying up to keep working, but he had been passed out on the couch when Seb got up to use the restroom at around 5 am.   
The cast floated through their day on clouds of anticipation. Whenever Seb had seen one of them, all they could talk about was how the flash mob was going to work. Carlos tried to get everyone organized to practice, but it was difficult because they all had different lunches.   
Seb talked animatedly with Carlos as they made their way to the cafeteria after school where the meeting would be held. The chairs and benches were already set up. It felt like a punch to his gut. The reality that they might not have a drama teacher in an hour was finally starting to sink in. The cast huddled in the back out of the way, trying to find topics of discussion to distract themselves. Seb couldn’t help but notice though that everyone, including him, kept shooting anxious glances around in a search for Miss Jenn.   
The chairs began to fill up, so Seb snagged one towards the front just as Miss Jenn entered. Once Principal Guitterez saw that she was seated, he approached the table to start the meeting.   
They sat through half of an hour of budget cuts and conduct guidelines before they got to Miss Jenn. Right from the start, it did not sound promising. Principal Guiterrez poked at her style of teaching, accused her of not having a real degree, and even made fun of all theater people. Seb wasn’t even the one on trial and he felt like he might throw up. Miss Jenn struggled to come up with a response, but to everyone’s surprise, Ricky’s dad stood up.   
“Excuse me, can I say something?” Mr. Bowen asked.   
“I’m sorry. We’re not opening the floor to parents on this,” Principal Guiterrez immediately shot back.   
“Let him speak,” one of Nini’s moms said over the murmurs of all the disgruntled parents.   
“Go ahead, Mr. Bowen,” their principal sighed, relinquishing the floor.   
“I’m a little late to the party, but I’ve got to say the real crime here would be booting a teacher who’s making a positive impact. I’ve never seen my kid this invested in anything, and I don’t think that’s something we should punish. Your...honor.”   
Everyone looked around at each other, giving nods of surprise and appreciation.   
“Mr. Bowen, I appreciate your statement, but I think we can all agree that theater isn’t unique in this regard,” Principal Guitterez replied. “It doesn’t have some special fairy dust that can’t be filled by some other extracurricular.” Suddenly, his words were cut off by the sound of humming.   
Everyone looked around for the source of the noise as it grew louder and spread across the room. As soon as it flowed into music, Kourtney’s voice rang across the cafeteria.   
“Don’t say another word,” she sang, looking down over the railing at all the parents and cast members. One by one, all the cast members stood up to travel to their positions for the choreography. Seb smiled as he felt the music flow through him, erasing all of his nerves. This was their time to shine, and no one was going to take that away from them.   
He joined in with his classmates as they twirled and belted around the room. Not a single one was without a giant smile on their face. Obviously, they were all having a blast despite the circumstances. Seb inhaled when it was time for his solo.   
“She’s the one who cheers us on, so what if she’s dropping the ball?” he sang, and to his relief and joy, it sounded really good.   
At the end of the song, they all surrounded Miss Jenn, honoring her with as many jazz hands as they could. There was a breath of pause before Nini’s mom stood up and clapped, prompting a giant standing ovation from all the parents. Seb looked around the room in shock, realizing how much they had all loved it.   
“Settle down! Settle down! Settle down!” Principal Guiterrez shouted over the racket. Everyone immediately silenced themselves to await his verdict. “Do we have any questions?” he asked.   
“Just one,” chimed in the voice next to him. “How do I snag tickets for opening night?” the lady asked, standing up to perform some kind of hip-hop move.   
Everyone cheered. They had pulled it off! Somehow, they had created something amazing in only a few hours. And no one had forgotten their lines or dance moves! That was the power of theater, Seb guessed. Seb felt relief flood his body and his grin flopped from a forced stage grin to one of genuine overjoyment.   
Everyone turned to hug each other. Seb got swept into EJ’s arms, and then into several others. Seb wasn’t sure how he felt about EJ, but he thought the way today went proved that they could all move past all the drama and just appreciate each other for what they brought. Finally, Seb turned around and was face-to-face with Carlos. Carlos opened his arms up, offering him a hug. Seb leaned in, giving him a quick squeeze like he had in the bathroom less than a day ago. Wow! Had that really only been yesterday? It felt like ages ago. They hadn’t had the chance to talk all day, and Seb didn’t feel like they could put it off any longer. Thankfully, Carlos was on the same page.   
“I can’t believe we pulled this off!” he marveled, stepping off to the side of the action so they could chat. People began to file out, so Seb assumed the meeting must have ended somewhere in all the chaos.   
“Me either!” Seb agreed. “The magic of theater, right?” Carlos nodded.   
“I’m just so glad to have Miss Jenn back. It really wasn’t the same without her. I think I'd be lost without this show.” Seb’s heart ached to see the relief on Carlos’s face. Working on this show was obviously a lifeline for Carlos.   
“Me too!” Seb murmured in understanding. “What Ricky said about this being a family… that’s really true. Even if we don’t always get along perfectly.”   
“Yeah, I’ve been so caught with the show that I forget that sometimes. I mean, I don’t really talk to anyone outside rehearsal,” Carlos said shyly. “Besides you, of course,” he added awkwardly.   
“Yeah, you’re not the only one to have realized that,” Seb quipped before he could think it through. He blushed, but Carlos laughed in surprise.   
“I just feel like I need to make more of an effort to hang out with everyone. I mean… I tried to at homecoming, but that was a total disaster.”   
“Not a total disaster,” Seb protested. From his perspective, the night had turned out pretty amazing.   
“I guess you’re right,” Carlos relented with a smile. There was a pause as they grinned at each other that definitely could be interpreted as more-than-friendly.   
“Well,” coughed Seb, breaking the moment. “You’re always welcome to have lunch with me and Natalie and Rico. Nini and Kourtney have started joining us sometimes too.”   
Carlos’s eyes lit up with gratitude. Seb realized this was probably the first time he had been invited to sit anywhere.   
“I would love that, Seb,” Carlos exhaled. “You’re the best.” He took Seb’s hand, and they stood there for a moment in companionable silence.   
Before either of them could speak again, Seb felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned around to see Sabrina standing there. She seemed a little peeved off, her hand on her hip. She must have been trying to get Seb’s attention.   
“Oh hey, Sabrina,” Seb said, still recovering from the shock of seeing her there. “I didn’t realize you were here. I was just, um, talking to Carlos.” Sabrina eyebrows raised in realization, and Carlos smiled nervously. “Umm, Sabrina, this is Carlos. Carlos, this is my older sister, Sabrina.” They nodded at each other.   
“Nice to meet you,” Carlos said. Realizing they were still holding hands, he dropped his from Seb’s, causing them both to blush.   
“Nice to meet you too,” Sabrina mused, pretending not to notice. She turned back to Seb. “Are you ready to go?”   
“Yeah,” Seb nodded. “See you later,” he smiled at Carlos before turning around to follow Sabrina towards the front doors.   
“He is cute,” Sabrina whispered as soon as they were out of speaking range.   
“He’s mine,” Seb growled instinctively. It was uncharacteristic of him to be so possessive, and Sabrina laughed.   
“Okay, geez, I know,” she told him. “Someone’s got it bad,” she teased, ruffling his hair.   
“I know,” Seb breathed. He looked down to hide his blush as he walked down the hallway shoulder-to-shoulder with his sister. 

October 20, 2019  
It was Sunday afternoon, and Seb was sitting in the barn. He leaned against the cool metal railing to one of the stalls, the scent of hay burning his nostrils. One of the cows rested her head on the railing next to Seb’s, and he gently stroked the soft hair of her neck. Ever since Bessie had passed, he had been trying to make more of an effort to spend time with the animals. This was the first time all week he had had a free moment. The animals were all lazy in the afternoons, so the barn was quiet except for the soft whimpers of dreams. It made it a great place to think, and Seb had a lot to think about.   
Carlos had started sitting next to Seb at lunch and they had been spending every free second of rehearsal together. There was less choreography to teach now, so Carlos wasn’t nearly as busy. It was great, but something still felt off to Seb. Every time he had felt like they had a moment, it had been cut short, leaving Seb more frustrated and confused than ever. On top of that, Seb still felt like he was struggling to fill Tisdale’s shoes. Sure, playing Sharpay was fun most of the time, but it still didn’t feel quite real to him. He worried that if he pinched himself he would wake up and this show, and his friendship with Carlos, would disappear. He lifted his arm from the cow’s neck and buried his face in it.   
“What am I doing?” he looked up at the cow with a sigh. At that exact moment, the side door to the barn creaked open and Sam poked his head in.   
“Are you talking to the cows?” he asked with amusement, standing in the doorway. Seb stared at him open-mouthed, blinking rapidly in surprise.   
“Oh...ummm…” he stammered. “I guess so,” he chuckled and Sam joined in. Seb’s little brother came to sit next to him on the haystack.   
“Well, what were you talking about?” Sam queried. He was a quiet kid, but if you let him, he would let his curiosity get the best of him. He was known in their family to spew out constant streams of questions.   
“Nothing…” Seb lied.   
“Are you sure, cause you seem kind of sad,” Sam pried. Seb looked over at him in surprise. He hadn’t expected his brother to be in tune with his emotions.   
“I’m not sad,” Seb told him. “I mean.. It was sad that we lost Bessie, but that’s not what I was thinking about.” Sam didn’t respond, but he looked at his brother questionably. Seb sighed, taking a second to collect his thoughts. “It’s just… I love being in the musical and I wouldn’t give it up for anything, but it’s been taking up all of my time and energy.”   
Sam nodded in understanding. “Yeah, it hasn’t been the same without you around as much.” He didn’t say it like he wanted Seb to feel guilty, but Seb could sense that Sam felt jilted all the same. He looked over at him apologetically.   
“Oh geez, Sam, I’m so sorry! I’ve been so focused on my own problems that I haven’t been a very good brother.” He set his hand on Sam’s shoulder.   
“No, Seb!” Sam protested. “You’ve been a great brother. When you got here that day…” he gulped on the next words, “the day we lost Bessie, Mom instantly calmed down. You kind of have that effect on people, I guess?” Seb raised his eyebrows in surprise. He had never thought of himself like that. It was especially surprising coming from his little brother. Seb was ashamed to realize he hadn’t known how smart Sam was.   
“Huh,” Seb huffed. He supposed it was true. He couldn’t help but think of all of the times he had offered himself for Carlos to lean on. “You’re really observant, Sam. Thanks for being such a great listener.”   
“You’re welcome,” Sam smiled. Seb leaned over to hug him, and they held each other for many moments like they hadn’t in a decade. 

October 31, 2019  
Seb’s mom had asked him to take Sam and Sophie trick-or-treating, and Seb hadn’t been able to say no. She dropped them off near the park for a few hours to make their rounds through the neighborhood. Seb wasn’t wearing a costume, but his siblings traipsed from door to door in their Tinker Bell and Harry Potter costumes.   
After about a half of an hour, their plastic pumpkins were already almost full, and Seb convinced them to check out the carnival in the park. They could have a little more freedom, and Seb could get the chance to sit down. The air was cool and crisp as they strolled down the pavement and Seb appreciated it because they hardly ever got fall weather in Salt Lake. They stepped off the sidewalk to the hill leading down to the park. Sophie raced ahead, throwing crunchy brown leaves into the air. The wet grass squelched beneath Seb’s feet. The colorful signs, sounds of children laughing, and the smell of kettle corn told Seb that they were approaching the carnival. Seb’s stomach growled, so he bought all three of them apple cider and mini doughnuts before sending his siblings off the play.   
He had just sat down under a grove of maples and pulled out his phone when he heard a familiar voice behind him.   
He whipped around to see Gina yelling at someone in the distance, her back to the bench.   
“Gina!” he yelled, resting his arm on the ledge. Gina literally twirled around like the dancer she was. She was obviously ticked off about something though. Her eyebrows were knitted and she had her hand on her hip. She did soften a little bit though when she saw Seb.   
“Seb! Hi!” she breathed as she moved towards him, “What are you doing here?” she smiled.   
“I brought my younger siblings. They’re around here somewhere.” Seb made a vague gesturing motion towards the crowd. It wasn’t that he was irresponsible, he just knew they were having fun anyway. Gina chuckled.   
“You’re so funny Seb. That’s what I always say.” Seb scrunched his face in confusion. He thought Gina was an only sibling.   
“Who were you yelling at?” he asked.   
“My neighbor’s kid,” Gina quipped, coming closer to Seb. “I can’t believe she asked me to babysit on Halloween. She works with my mom though, so I can’t complain,” she grumbled.   
“That’s rough,” Seb agreed sympathetically. They stood there awkwardly for a minute. Seb could tell that Gina didn’t want to leave, but she didn’t know how to say it out loud. “Do you- uh- wanna sit?” he stammered. Gina looked surprised at the offer like she hadn’t expected anyone to invite her to sit with them. “I just figured, since we’re both stuck here…” he rambled on unnecessarily. Gina recovered and smiled, cutting off Seb.   
“Uh yeah, sure,” she agreed. She wrapped her arms around herself to warm up as she circled to sit next to Seb.   
“Do you have a lot of siblings?” she asked. Seb nodded vigorously.   
“Five! I’m right in the middle of all of them.” Gina’s mouth widened in surprise.   
“Wow! I can’t imagine that!” she marveled. “It’s just been me and my mom for as long as I can remember.” Seb nodded in understanding. “It must be pretty great having that many siblings around.”   
“It is….” Seb admitted. Gina leaned in expectedly, sensing there was more. “...but it can also be a complete pain in the butt.”  
Just at that moment, Sophie came running up to them.   
“Sebby! Sebby!” she squealed. “Look what I won!” She dumped a pile of temporary tattoos into his lap. “Can I get fairy dust on my face?” she begged.   
“What?” Seb asked, very confused. Sophie pointed to the face paint table and Seb nodded in understanding. “Yeah, sure,” he relented. She bounced off excitedly. Gina smiled, and her features were much gentler than Seb was used to. He realized that she must have had a softer layer underneath that she didn’t show. It made Seb feel guilty he had let himself be intimidated by her because this side of Gina was one he wanted to get to know. “Sorry,” Seb chuckled. “That was my little sister.”   
“She’s adorable,” Gina assured him. “You seem like a good brother.”   
“Thank you, Gina,” Seb smiled. “If only it was as easy to talk to them as it is to dance.” Gina looked up at him in confusion. “I hardly ever overthink anything when I dance. I might not be a super good dancer, but at least it’s a language I understand.”   
Gina nodded enthusiastically. “I totally get it! No matter what changes in my life, at least I have dance. It’s where I can let down my guard a little bit.”   
Seb pondered this. Now that he thought about it, he had only ever seen Gina smile when she was dancing. She seemed more in her element there than anywhere else.   
“Seb?” she asked, breaking him from his thoughts.   
“Humm?” Seb mumbled. He was puzzled by the look of pity on her face.   
“Why do you think you’re not a very good dancer?”   
Seb felt kind of put on the spot. He started to itch his neck uncomfortably. He had never had anyone challenge his self-doubt like this until now.   
“Umm…. There’s no way I can keep up with the kind of stuff you or Rico or Stephy does,” Seb pointed out. Every day in rehearsal he struggled just not to fall further behind in his dance skills.  
“Seb, we’ve all had years and years of dance experience. You’ve learned everything in just a few weeks.”   
“Oh, yeah, I guess,” Seb blanched. He hadn’t thought of it like that.   
“I’m telling you- you just need a little more confidence in your dance abilities, and you could be a full triple threat,” she said. Seb’s mouth widened at the compliment.   
“You really think so?” Seb asked. That meant a lot coming from the best dancer in the cast.   
“Of course!” Gina smirked. Suddenly, there was a voice in the distance calling for her.   
“Got to go, but we’ll talk later?” she asked, standing up from the bench.   
“Uh, yeah,” Seb nodded. “It was nice.”   
“It was,” she agreed, her face softening. She turned around, leaving Seb on the bench more confused, but happier than before. 

November 2, 2019  
Seb’s mom pulled up to the school shortly after 9 am the next Saturday. The cast had complained that it was too early for a non-school day, but they had had Thursday and Friday off and Miss Jenn had insisted that a weekend rehearsal would boost morale and team bonding. They all got to wear their pajamas at least, so Seb didn’t mind too much.   
As he was walking down the hall towards the auditorium, he heard a whisper behind him.   
“Seb, hey, Seb,” the voice called. Seb turned around to see Carlos poking his head out of the doorway of the band room. Seb’s face broke out into a huge grin.   
“What are you doing?” he asked with a chuckle as he stepped towards the choreographer. He closed the distance and Carlos shut the door behind them. Seb saw that they were both wearing flannel pajama pants, although Carlos’s were black and gray and Seb’s were red.   
“I have something for you,” Carlos said mischievously. He was leaning against the counter lining the wall. He reached over to grab a styrofoam cup and offered it to Seb. “Careful, it still might be hot.”   
Hesitantly, Seb wrapped his hands around the drink and took a tiny sip. The sweetness melted on his tongue and traveled down to warm his chest.   
“Is this hot chocolate?” Seb asked in surprise. Carlos nodded, smiling at the pleasure on Seb’s face. “You remembered!” Seb marveled. It felt like so long ago when he had mentioned that he didn’t like coffee at the cafe.   
“Of course I did,” Carlos replied, remembering the same moment. Lost for words, they grinned at each other for a moment. Then, Carlos sighed, breaking the moment. “Just… don’t let anyone know I was the one who got this for you, okay? If they knew I stopped for coffee and didn’t get them any, there would be outrage.”   
Seb laughed. He couldn’t argue with that statement. People had already made comments about Carlos giving Seb preferential treatment, which was probably the reason for all the secrecy. Seb couldn’t complain, though, because it was adorable. He would take any free moment with Carlos he could get, even if he would be teased about it later.   
“Ready to go?” Carlos asked. Seb nodded, and Carlos grabbed his own drink off the counter. Together, they slipped out the classroom door and down to the auditorium. 

When they got there, everyone was already in a circle warming up. Carlos had to go talk to Miss Jenn, so Seb slipped in the circle between Ashlyn and E.J. He went to finish the last few sips of his drink when he saw the look on Ashlyn’s face.   
“What’s that?” she asked, knowing full well what it was but just wanting to provoke Seb.   
“It’s nothing,” Seb shot back, but she wasn’t buying it.   
“I thought you said you were running late,” she accused. Drat, Seb had told her that.   
“Oh, uh, yeah, because we stopped to get drinks,” he stammered. She knew he was lying (Seb didn’t know how), but she just rolled her eyes and smirked. Seb didn’t even try to hide his blush as he stepped out of the circle to throw his cup away.   
Just then, Miss Jenn stepped into the center of the stage and announced that they were going to attempt to run the whole show this morning because it was the first time they had the whole show learned and enough time to work through it.   
“I know it’s going to be rough, and I don’t expect it to be perfect, but I want you all to be familiar with the flow of the show,” she said. “Remember, no matter what happens, just keep going unless I tell you otherwise. Places for the top!” she shouted, and the cast rushed to find their respective spots.   
It was a mess, and a little frustrating at times. They had to stop every five minutes to work out a kink in the choreography, figure out who was going to bring a set-piece on, or to ask for lines. They were technically supposed to be off-book today, but since they still had a month until opening night none of them, except for maybe Gina, were fully memorized. Seb talked with castmates when he wasn’t on stage, but he tried to keep focused on what was happening and keep his voice down so he didn’t disrupt what was going on in the show. He didn’t mind just watching whoever was onstage. This was one of his favorite parts of being in a show- the first time he gets to watch his castmates perform their scenes and the show starts to come together.   
About halfway through the first act, Ashlyn sidled up to him. There was no one else around because they were all getting ready for Stick to the Status Quo. Because Seb entered after everyone else, he had a few minutes before he had to get in position.   
“That was nice of Carlos to bring you a drink,” she smirked. Seb whipped his head towards her in surprise.   
“What- how did you-” he spluttered, his face growing red.   
“I was behind Carlos in line. I don’t think he saw me, but I noticed he picked up two drinks. I should’ve figured the second one was for you,” she teased.   
“Stop it!” Seb protested. He wanted to say more, but Rico came up and interrupted his thought process.   
“We have to get ready,” he said. Seb nodded gratefully and followed him away from Ashlyn, glancing back with a fake apologetic look.   
He stood on the stairs for his entrance, his legs shaking. He was still shaken from the conversation he had with Ashlyn, but he had to get his head in the game. This was the first time the cast was seeing his choreography in Stick to the Status Quo and he wanted to do it right.   
All too soon, the track reached his cue in the song, and Seb took a deep breath as he climbed the stairs.   
“Everybody quiet,” he shouted. Everyone’s head turned towards him, both because of the choreography and out of shock of the forcefulness of his voice. The cast still wasn’t used to the new persona that Seb took on when he was onstage.   
He tried to block out everything else as he began the choreography, but he was still ultra-aware of the eyes glued to him. He flowed through the dance, surprising himself with his execution. He realized as he was prepping for the spin that everyone had stopped their choreography and were watching him, utterly impressed. As Rico took his arm and spun him parallel to the ground, everyone began to cheer. Fueled by their encouragement, Seb sang even louder and added an extra little flourish into his final moves. By the time the song ended and Seb landed in his ending pose, he was completely out of breath.   
Before he could process what had just happened, everyone came swarming up to him, wrapping him a huge group hug.   
“That was incredible, Seb,” Nini whispered. She had been closest to him at the end of the song, so her cheek was practically pressed up against his.   
“I knew you had it in you,” Gina added. She helped part the crowd for Seb as everyone murmured their praises in agreement. He broke away, overwhelmed by the reaction.   
“I give up,” Carlos joked as he raced up to Seb and squeezed his arms. “I don’t think I can ever top that again for the rest of my career.” Seb laughed. Miss Jenn came to stand behind Carlos. She cleared her throat, and Carlos dropped Seb’s arms.   
“I think that’s a good place to take a break,” she beamed. Immediately, everyone scattered, still high from the excitement of the performance. 

After an equally chaotic but exhilarating second act, they all took a long break for pizza. They sat on the stage, Seb dangling his legs off the edge as he sat between Carlos and Natalie. He was starting to crash but Miss Jenn came back into the room bursting with energy. She came to stand in the middle of the stage, and they all turned around to face her.   
“Amazing work today team. We got through the run in record time.” There were a few scattered laughs because it had taken them three and a half hours without props or costumes to get through an hour and a half long show, but no one said anything. “I think it’s time to play a team bonding game!” Everyone looked around at each other nervously. What exactly was she planning? “Ashlyn, honey, are you ready?” Miss Jenn asked, looking across towards the wings. Suddenly, Ashlyn appeared, coming to stand next to her. “I asked your Ms. Darbus here to come up with a game for us all to play,” their director explained. “She’ll explain how it’s going to be done.” She stepped back to give Ashlyn the floor.   
“We’re going to play Sardines,” Ashlyn announced.   
“What’s that?” Seb asked. He had played a lot of theater games but he had never heard of this one. There were cries of agreement throughout the cast. Apparently, none of them knew what it was either.   
“It’s basically like hide and seek but with partners,” she answered over the noise. “One pair stays here while the rest hide and then they try to find each group one by one. Once you’re found then you have to help the first group seek.”   
The room was silent as they all processed the rules.   
“Where are we allowed to hide?” asked Gina, the competitive glint in her eye growing by the second.   
“Anywhere within the school. At least, anyplace that’s unlocked,” Ashlyn said. “Why don’t we all partner up?”   
Immediately, Seb felt Carlos’s hand on his shoulder. Ashlyn’s eyes flicked over to them, but she smiled and called over to Big Red.   
“I’ll be with Kourtney,” Nini asserted. She obviously didn’t want to be stuck with E.J., Ricky, or Gina.   
“Uh..” Ricky stammered, realizing that everyone else had already paired up. “I’ll take Natalie,” he suggested nonchalantly. She huffed, but stood up to join him. She didn’t want to play, but there was no way Miss Jenn would let her get out of this.   
“I guess that leaves you and me, Caswell,” Gina noted to E.J. “Are we going to win this or not?”   
“We better,” E.J. scowled, accepting her challenge. Seb wasn’t sure if they had made up after the whole homecoming disaster, but now that they were forced to partner up they would make a formidable team. Seb stood up to join the clump, followed closely by Carlos.   
“Big Red and I will count first,” Ashlyn suggested. Seb wasn’t sure when she and the other ginger had become so close, but he didn’t have time to question it because he felt Carlos’s breath on his neck. Apparently, he and Carlos were at the point in their relationship where it was assumed they would be partners and brought each other drinks. Did that mean anything? Seb’s head hurt thinking about it. “We’ll give you all a minute,” Ashlyn warned. They all panicked while she started counting. Groups scattered across the auditorium, some going to the wings, some racing through the seats, and some slipping behind the set to the dressing rooms.   
Carlos grabbed Seb’s hand and pulled him off the left and towards a utility closet.   
“I have a place,” he said when they were out of hearing range. Seb nodded submissively and Carlos yanked open the door to the closet. There was a black pipe ladder against the wall. Carlos motioned for Seb to climb up it. Frantically, Seb leaped up and started mounting it, too flustered to question his partner. The ladder was slippery, so they had to go slow to avoid falling. At one point, Carlos’s hands reached up and brushed Seb’s hips like he was going to catch him, and Seb realized how close behind he was.   
Seb stumbled to steady himself as he stepped onto the platform overlooking the stage. He had to duck to avoid bumping his head, and he dropped to his knees.   
“Woah,” he gasped. Carlos came to kneel beside him, smiling at the look of awe on Seb’s face. He never realized this balcony was up here, tucked against the back wall of the stage. It was meant to house set pieces and lights, but it was rarely used because it was so crowded. He could see all of the seats splayed out in front of him. If he leaned over the pipe railing, he could make out the edge of the main curtain and the front of the stage dozens of feet below him. Ashlyn and Big Red were tiny specs as they traveled down the middle aisle side by side. Seb gulped, not realizing they had climbed so high.   
They sat there in companionable silence for a while, not feeling the need to talk. Well, there were things that they could’ve discussed, but Seb wasn’t sure if Carlos wanted to open those up. What they had right now was pretty great, and Seb didn’t want to mess it up by assuming there was something there that wasn’t. He struggled for several moments to come up with something safe but meaningful to contribute.   
“How did you know this was up here?” he finally asked. Carlos’s smile grew embarrassed.   
“I used to come up here last year when I had nowhere else to go. I knew the old drama teacher and she would let me crash during your rehearsals,” he admitted. Seb looked over at Carlos and blinked. He hadn’t realized Carlos had been that lonely last year, or that he had been here the whole time during rehearsals. His heart broke to imagine Carlos sitting up here by himself. He lowered himself so he was sitting crossed-legged.   
“You would watch us from up here?” Seb asked. Carlos looked down, obviously ashamed. He must have thought Seb was judging him, which wasn’t true at all. However, his next words disarmed the blond boy.   
“Well, watch one person at least,” he breathed. His eyes caught Seb’s, and there was no question as to who he was referring to.   
“Oh,” Seb gasped, speechless at the admission. Carlos had been paying attention to him last year like that? Was this flirting? Was this the moment that Seb found out Carlos had the same feelings as him?   
“God, that probably sounds so pathetic,” Carlos chuckled nervously, breaking Seb’s thought spiral.   
“No, that wasn’t what I was thinking at all,” Seb assured him, scooting closer so that their legs were pressed together. He couldn’t read the look on Carlos’s face, but he didn’t ask for clarification so Seb guessed he had made his own assumptions. “Thank you for sharing this with me,” Seb said. “This is an awesome place.” Carlos grinned.  
“Well, I know it’s a good hiding spot at least,” he joked. “It’s a good spot to go if you don’t want to be bothered.” His eyes grew wide as soon as the words were out of his mouth. It was too late to shove them back because they had both realized the implications behind the words: that this was a good place to be alone. They looked at each other for a long moment, unspoken words on the tip of their tongues. It was about time they stopped dancing around what this, homecoming and late-night texts and relentless flirting, all meant. At the same time, though, they both chickened out. Seb turned away, biting his lip, but he stayed pressed against Carlos. He must’ve been reading way too much into the situation because when he turned back the other boy’s face was blank. Seb struggled to come up with something to say to change the subject, but to his relief, he didn’t have to because voices drifted up from the crack in the closet door. They broke eye contact to watch as a familiar red head poked up. The boys sprung apart as Ashlyn hauled herself onto the platform. The rest of the cast began to fill in behind her, and Seb was concerned about how they were all going to fit in such a tiny space.   
“Hey,” Ashlyn smiled a little too perkily. “Fancy finding you guys up here.”   
“You found all of them before us?” Seb asked, gesturing to the rest of the groups. He hadn’t realized that they had been up there for that long.   
“Well….” Big Red said in a sing-song voice. Ashlyn shot him a look telling him to shut up. What were they up to? Carlos crossed his arms in impatience.   
“Did we win?” he asked. There was too long of a pause before Ashlyn nodded.   
“You were the last ones I found,” she answered robotically. Gina huffed over next to her before she could continue.   
“Hold on- I thought you said EJ and I won?” Gina protested.   
“You guys!” Ashlyn cried in exasperation. She was acting like they had spoiled some kind of surprise.   
“What’s going on?” Seb asked. He had obviously missed something, and it kind of hurt to feel left out. Ashlyn looked back and forth between him and Carlos for a second. Finally, she sighed, unable to hold on to her stubbornness.   
“I knew you and Carlos were up here from the start,” she admitted, a mischievous smirk overtaking her face. “I just thought I should let you guys be and find everyone else first.” Carlos looked like he was going to kill her. It took a second for Seb to realize why and then his mouth widened in understanding. She had basically orchestrated a whole moment for them. He tried not to blush under the stares of the entire cast.   
“How did you know about this place?” Carlos asked accusingly.   
“You showed it to me last year,” Ashlyn reminded her. Carlos opened his mouth to protest before he realized that was true and snapped it shut. Apparently, this place wasn’t as sacred as Seb had thought if he had brought Ash up here. Ashlyn wasn’t letting go of the idea that something happened between them though. She looked back and forth between them again, trying to determine if her plan had worked. “I’m not surprised you brought Seb up here,” she added with raised eyebrows. Neither Seb nor Carlos got the chance to respond because Miss Jenn interrupted.   
“Was that the last group?” she asked, poking her head up.   
“Yes, Miss Jenn,” Ashlyn turned away from the boys to call back.   
“I want you all to come back down here then,” Miss Jenn requested. Her head disappeared and Ashlyn sighed. The cast began to follow her towards the steps. Seb looked over at Carlos, whose face was once again blank. Neither of them said anything to Ashlyn in the shuffle, but Seb thought he saw Carlos squeeze Ashlyn’s shoulders a little too tightly when he grabbed onto them to steady himself.   
Seb had no idea what Carlos was thinking. He could barely sort through his emotions. Based on Carlos’s reaction, though, Ashlyn’s words were ringing true. Carlos hadn’t just been being friendly. Their conversation had said much more than they actually needed to speak out loud.


	7. It's a date? (ep. 7)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode 7 of High School Musical, the Musical: The Series from Seb's perspective. Carlos offers to take Seb to Ashlyn's party and then calls Seb honey, prompting discussions about what exactly their relationship is.

November 27, 2019  
It was the day before Thanksgiving, and there was an air of excitement in the rehearsal room. Not only was the cast looking forward to the holiday, but it was their last rehearsal before tech week. They all felt the countdown to show night ticking closer and closer. Over the past few weeks, they had really focused to refine the show as much as they could.   
They were running The Start of Something New, Seb accompanying Nini and Ricky on the piano, and it was going really smoothly until a bell sounded and cut them off.   
“Yes! Yes! Whoo!” EJ shouted, standing up and throwing his arms into the air. Looks of confusion rippled through the room. “Sorry, I really love Thanksgiving,” he added. There were laughs and enthused chatter as people split off to head out.   
“Okay, hold on,” Miss Jenn stopped them. She stood up from her chair and began to cross to the center of the room. Carlos followed her without hesitation. “I know everyone is excited about the holiday break, but I’m me, and I have notes,” she said. Seb was only half-listening to her as he stepped away from the piano and went to sit with the others on the risers.   
“Your homework over this break, all of you, is to please go on vocal rest,” she said to the room as he was zipping up his backpack. Seb turned away as she mumbled something about lines too. Mr. Mazzara came in then, causing a kerfuffle, but he started talking privately with Miss Jenn. Seb couldn’t tell what they were talking about, but he was too busy talking with Gina to care. He felt kind of bad for Gina- it was just going to be her and her mom. He thought about inviting her over to his house but decided against it. It was going to be chaotic enough, and he didn’t want to add stress for his parents. Now that he thought about it, though, he hadn’t had a friend over in a long time. He hung out with the cast all the time, even outside of rehearsal, but he never had them at his house. He would have to change that soon, especially at the rate his and Carlos’s relationship was going. Well, maybe relationship was a strong word. He blushed and tried to shake off the feelings rolling around inside of him.   
Ricky came over then and sat down next to Gina, joining in on their conversation. He was an only child just like Gina, so it was just going to be him and his dad. Seb remembered the conversation they had had at Big Red’s over a month ago and felt guilty he hadn’t been checking up on Ricky more. He had been killing it at rehearsals, acting like nothing was remiss, but Seb still felt bad his classmates were all going to have such lonely holidays. He wondered for a second if he should plan something for them all to get together, but it seemed Carlos had already read his mind.   
“Party after Thanksgiving at Ashlyn’s tomorrow!” Carlos shouted. “Everyone’s invited!” There were cheers from the people left in the room. Seb stood up as Gina and Ricky said bye and faded out. He crossed over to the group at the piano in time to hear Carlos say, “Was that too much? I’m sorry, I got excited.” Ashlyn laughed off her apprehension and shook her head.   
“No, no, it’s fine,” she gulped. “This wouldn’t be the first time one of us accidentally started an impromptu get together.” They all laughed.   
“True,” Big Red butted in, remembering that last time Ashlyn had invited everyone over to his house. “I can help you host, Ashlyn,” he offered with a grin. Ashlyn’s eyes grew wide with gratitude.   
“Really? You would do that?” she asked.   
“Sure, why not,” Big Red shrugged.   
“That would be awesome!” she sighed. “I have a few ideas….” her voice trailed off as the two gingers strolled out of the room together. Carlos and Seb watched them retreat skeptically, trying to process what had just happened. Ashlyn teased them mercilessly, but it seemed like maybe she was hiding her own feelings. They made brief eye contact, both acknowledging the new development. Suddenly, though, Seb grew aware that they were the last ones in the room and he looked down at the floor. It wasn’t the first time this had happened, but Seb was acutely aware of what might happen if they were alone in a room together because of where they had left off that day on the balcony.   
“I, uh... I guess I’ll see you tomorrow?” he asked Carlos. The choreographer shuffled his feet awkwardly like he was debating whether to say something. He must have decided not to because he just nodded.   
“Yeah, I’ll see you then,” he said, turning to escape before it grew any more awkward. Seb slipped behind the piano, settling himself to play a song. He had been working on writing one to let out all of his feelings, but his piano at home was in the living room and his whole family used it. It was kind of hard to write a song when you had no privacy. So, while he had the chance and he was still waiting for his ride, he thought he would use the one here.   
He started plucking the keys, but before he could get very far he heard someone shuffle back into the room. He looked up and stiffened to see Carlos standing there in the doorway.   
“Please don’t stop,” Carlos said. “I want to hear you play.” The look Carlos’s eyes was so longing that Seb couldn’t refuse.   
Much more self-conscious than before, he started to string out the melody. Carlos’s grew wide. He dropped his backpack right inside the door and crossed to stand next to Seb. Seb could feel his breath on his neck as he played. Even though Carlos didn’t know this song was about him, it still felt like Seb was bearing his heart to him.   
The song finished, and Seb gently lifted his hands from the keys.   
“Woah,” Carlos breathed when Seb looked up at him. Seb blushed at the look of pure astonishment on his face. “Seb, that was amazing,” Carlos told him. Seb shook his head, brushing off the compliment.   
“No, it was nothing-” he started, but Carlos broke him off with a disappointed look. The choreographer always called Seb out when he was too hard on himself. Before either of them could say another word, Seb’s phone buzzed very loudly from his backpack. Sighing, he slid across the bench to retrieve it from the risers.   
“My ride's here,” Seb told Carlos apologetically once he had pulled his phone from the bag and read the message.   
“Okay,” Carlos grinned half-heartedly. He walked over to Seb as he flung his bag onto his back. “I’ll walk out with you.” Seb didn’t refuse the offer, despite the fact, or maybe because of the fact, that he was still trying to process what had just happened.   
They left the room shoulder to shoulder, only stopping for Carlos to grab his bag on the way out. They talked all the way out into the parking lot, but the energy they had shared over the song was gone. 

Whatever had happened in the room that afternoon, and the awkwardness that had followed hadn’t stopped them from texting most of the evening and night. Around 1 in the morning, just as Seb was thinking he should probably get to bed, he got a text that nearly stopped his heart.   
~ do you think I could call you? ~ Carlos asked. Even through text, Seb could sense the hesitant tone. He sent a response before he could convince himself otherwise.   
~ yeah ~  
Barely 30 seconds later, his phone started buzzing with an incoming call.   
“Hey,” Seb whispered, ducking under the covers so he wouldn’t disturb his family.   
“Hey,” Carlos breathed back. Even though they had been texting non-stop, this was the first time they had called each other, and hearing each other’s voices felt strangely intimate. They both chuckled for a minute in astonishment. Seb wondered for a moment if he should ask if there was a reason that Carlos called, but the choreographer answered the question before it was spoken. “I can’t stop thinking about that song you played today,” Carlos said. “What was it?”   
“It was just something I’ve been writing,” Seb told him nonchalantly, not really thinking about it. There was silence for a second, and Seb panicked for a second thinking that Carlos had picked up on why Seb had written it.   
“You wrote it?” Carlos asked in astonishment, and Seb realized the silence was one of awe. Seb nodded, then realized that Carlos couldn’t see him.   
“Yeah,” he choked out, feeling really uncomfortable that that fact had been brought up.   
“Seb, that’s amazing!” Carlos was trying to keep his voice low, but Seb could still sense the amazement underneath it.   
“I guess,” Seb flushed.   
“I’m serious,” Carlos’s voice grew more forceful to drive home his point. “Is there anything you can’t do?”   
“Oh, yeah, lots of things,” Seb cut in, wanting to stop whatever glorified illusion Carlos had of him in his head.   
“Like what?” Carlos challenged. Seb panicked for a second, trying to think of something on the spot.   
“I can’t drive,” he finally spat out, remembering his frustration this week that he still had to rely on his parents and Sabrina for rides. His 16th birthday was still 7 months away, so he couldn’t even take the test yet.   
“Fair point,” Carlos admitted. Suddenly, he gasped. “That reminds me- I forgot to tell you. I just got my license!”   
“That’s great, Los!” Seb grinned. Seb knew that Carlos had been trying to get his license since his birthday in September. He had failed at least once, but apparently he had passed it now. Just in time for tech week too! “I’m pretty jealous,” Seb told him. “I still have so long until I can get mine.”   
“That really sucks,” Carlos agreed. There was a pause before Carlos strung together another question. “Do you have a ride to Ashlyn’s?” he asked.   
“No, not yet,” Seb groaned, realizing he had forgotten to ask his parents about it.   
“Well, do you want one?” Carlos asked before he could lose his nerve. Seb froze for a moment. His immediate reaction was an enthusiastic yes, but his anxiety rose at all the implications of being in a car with Carlos and arriving somewhere together. It felt a little too much like a rom-com for Seb’s comfort. But…. didn’t he deserve that? And nothing would probably happen anyway, because he couldn’t let himself be sure that Carlos liked him like that.   
“That would be great,” Seb finally replied. He could practically feel Carlos’s relieved smile through the phone.   
“Great!” Carlos sighed. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”   
“Yeah, see you tomorrow.”   
“Goodnight, Sebby.” Seb’s heart raced even faster at the use of his nickname.   
“Night, Los,” Seb mumbled, hanging up the phone before he completely lost all of his inhibitions. He plugged in his phone, needing to go to sleep, but instead, he just laid there, mentally recovering from that conversation so he could brace himself for whatever he had just gotten himself into tomorrow.

November 28, 2019   
Seb looked up at the clock on the microwave as he put his chocolate chip cookies into the oven. He had a half of an hour until Carlos came to pick him to take him to Ashlyn’s.  
“Hey, I’m going to pop in the shower before Carlos gets here,” he told his mom, who was still putting Thanksgiving leftovers in the fridge. “Can you take the cookies out of the oven when the alarm goes off?”   
“Sure thing, bub. Thanks for all the help today.” It was Seb’s parents’ turn to host all of their relatives, so he and all of his siblings had helped make all of the food. Seb was the only one who stayed to help clean up the copious mess. The last of his family had just left barely ten minutes ago.   
“Of course,” Seb said, accepting his mom’s hug. They stood there barefoot on the tile for a moment. When he went to leave, she grabbed his arm.   
“One more thing-” she said hesitantly. “Are you guys going as a date?” She didn’t ask it accusatorily, but Seb felt uncomfortable. He paused for a minute, realizing that he should have expected this question. He didn’t have an answer though. His and Carlos’s relationship had been in a weird limbo since homecoming. They couldn’t ignore their feelings anymore, especially now that they had started talking on the phone. They hadn’t discussed taking it further than that yet, though. Was volunteering to drive Seb to the party a way for Carlos to make a move? Seb felt more excitement than fear at this idea.   
“Yes?” he answered tentatively. “No? I don’t know,” he sighed. His mother laughed and ruffled his hair.   
“Ughhh,” grunted a voice from the adjacent dining room. Seb and his mom both jumped in surprise to realize that Sarah had been listening. “You guys really need to DTR.” Seb and his mom both blanched at this.   
“What?” Seb asked in concern, blushing scarlet. He was genuinely worried about what that meant.   
“DTR. Define the relationship,” Sarah clarified loudly, not even bothering to get up from the next room.   
“Oh,” Seb sighed in relief. He supposed she was right. He felt his mom relax her grip on his shoulder. She shook her head as Seb escaped upstairs. 

At exactly 7:30, Seb got a text from Carlos.   
~I’m waiting outside whenever you’re ready : )~  
Seb looked out his bedroom window and saw a pair of headlights idling in the driveway. Of course, Carlos was right on time. And, as was typical, Seb was running late. He took one last look at his hair in the mirror, unplugged his phone from the charger, and raced downstairs. He had taken way too long to get ready because he had been obsessing about what to wear. In the end, he had decided on a simple light pink button-up. It was comfortable and casual but he still felt like himself in it.   
His mom had already put in the cookies in a Tupperware container without Seb asking her to, probably because she knew he was going to be rushing.   
“Carlos is here, I’m heading out,” he called upstairs as he grabbed the container off the counter.   
“One minute, I’m coming!” his mom appeared at the top of the stairs. “Why don’t you invite him in for a minute?”   
“Sorry, running late, really got to go!” Seb covered, beelining towards the front door. It wasn’t that he was embarrassed by Carlos or that he didn’t want his parents to meet him eventually, but he was not ready for that awkwardness tonight.   
“Seb-” his mother called, but he didn’t hear the rest of her words as he stepped out into the cool night air and pulled the door closed behind him. 

“Hey,” Carlos breathed when Seb opened the door to the car. It was hard to tell in the dark, but Seb thought it was a really old Jeep.   
“Hey,” Seb smiled as he settled the container of still-warm cookies on his lap and buckled the seatbelt. “You look great!” Carlos was wearing a leather jacket and some kind of jersey with a yellow wildcat on it. It was so uniquely and perfectly Carlos that it made Seb’s heart throb. Carlos bit back his smile at the compliment.   
“You look amazing too!” Carlos beamed, and Seb blushed. He hoped the lighting was low enough that Carlos wouldn’t notice. Amazing was quite a step up from great. “Like a cute farm boy meets Sharpay!”   
Seb’s jaw dropped. How did Carlos always just get him? “That’s what I was going for!” Seb chuckled. “Well... I don’t know about the cute part.”  
Carlos crossed his arms, glaring disappointedly at him. “Just take the compliment, Sebby.”   
“Okay, okay,” Seb relented. Carlos didn’t drop his expression though.   
“Seriously though, I must really like you to drive all the way out here,” Carlos quipped, sufficiently flustering Seb. What in the world did that mean?   
“Sorry I was running late,” Seb stuttered through a shaky smile. He fiddled with the collar of his shirt, wincing a little at his lack of consideration.   
Carlos laughed. “Wouldn’t be the first time,” he teased, and Seb feigned shock.   
“Hey! I was going to offer you one of these while they’re still warm, but that was just cruel,” Seb protested. Carlos looked over at him, clutching his heart. His pleading brown eyes were illuminated by the glowing porch light. Seb couldn’t resist the look on his face. “Fine,” he sighed, popping open the Tupperware lid. Carlos grabbed for it greedily, shoving a cookie in his mouth before Seb could change his mind.   
“Did you make these?” he asked, his mouth still full of food. Seb nodded and Carlos’s eyes widened. “Wow! They’re amazing! I didn’t know you could bake.” Carlos swallowed the last of the cookie in one go. He placed his finger on Seb’s chest, and Seb felt a trickle run down his spine.   
“Thank you, it’s a Matthew-Smith family recipe.” Seb gulped as Carlos trailed his finger down his chest, setting off new sensations in him he hadn’t even realized were possible. Seb realized what Carlos was doing though when he went to reach for another cookie. He slammed the lid down and Carlos pulled his hand away. “No more until the party! Why don’t you drive?” The words came out more assertive than Seb intended, and Carlos wiggled his eyebrows in amusement.   
“Yes ma’am,” he coughed, sliding his foot over to the brake to back out. When he went to shift gears though, the car rolled forward and he slammed on the brakes. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I almost just drove into your front porch.” Seb could tell that Carlos was on the verge of a panic attack. He hadn’t noticed how anxious Carlos was until now.   
“Hey, look at me,” Seb whispered. Carlos shifted into park and slowly released the brake. He turned around to face Seb, and the blonde boy put his hand on his shoulder. “You’re doing fine. Just breathe.” Carlos took a deep breath, and the pressure evaporated off of him. “It’s okay, you were just in the wrong gear.” Seb made sure Carlos’s foot was safely on the brakes again before he wrapped his hand around Carlos’s right hand and pulled back until the car shifted into reverse. Carlos looked shocked as he slowly pulled out of the long, dirt driveway and onto the freeway.   
“How do you know how to drive a stickshift?” he asked, his eyes firmly on the road. He was obviously worried about making another driving mistake with Seb in the car.   
“I’ve been driving tractors since I was 8. This isn’t much different,” Seb explained, motioning to the console. Carlos shrugged thoughtfully.   
“I guess you’re right. You really are full of surprises.” His eyes lit up and Seb could see the start of a smirk forming. Even from a side profile, Seb could read all of Carlos’s emotions. “Thank you for calming me down back there,” he continued. The reflection of his glance in the rearview mirror expressed more gratefulness than words could say. 

It was easy to tell which house was Ashlyn’s because the driveway was already full, cars spilling out into the street. Carlos pulled up right next to some shrubs that were nearly as tall as Seb. He had to step on them and crush them to get out.   
“Nice parking job,” Seb snorted, latching the passenger door closed. Carlos rolled his eyes.   
“Shut up and help me get something out of the backseat.” Carlos clicked his keys to unlock the back doors and Seb ducked his head in. For a minute, he thought there were pizza boxes back there, but then he started giggling.   
“Did you- strap it in?” The box was buckled into the seatbelt like a child to keep it from falling. Probably a good idea with Carlos driving.   
“Yes. It’s precious cargo,” Carlos huffed, unlatching the seatbelt on the driver’s side.   
“What is it?” Seb asked, copying the action on the passenger side.   
“You’ll see,” Carlos smirked mischievously, leaning towards the middle to take the load in his arms. Their fingers brushed, and for a wild second, Seb thought about making a move towards Carlos. He pulled back hastily instead, nearly bumping his head on the top of the doorframe. He hustled around the front of the car to follow Carlos up the gravel pathway to the front door. Carlos knocked clumsily while still trying to cradle whatever was in his arms. Seriously, he was acting pretty suspicious.   
“C’mon in!” a voice shouted from inside. The two boys stood there side by side for a minute, waiting for the other until Carlos looked over at Seb with exasperation.   
“Get the door for me please?” he asked, and Seb was shaken from his stupor.   
“Oh yeah, yeah, of course,” he nodded, reaching for the cold metal nob. The white screen door began to creak open.   
Carlos barged in without hesitation. People cleared the way, greeting him as he made a beeline towards the back of the house. Seb shook his head, only stopping to close the door behind them and set his cookies onto the counter next to some adorable cupcakes decorated with turkeys. It looks like he wasn’t the only baker in the cast.   
“The party may begin,” Carlos announced flamboyantly as he strolled into the living room. He looked so excited, and Seb loved to see Carlos in his element like this. Carlos really was the life of the party, even if not everyone realized that. After all, he was the whole reason for this in the first place.   
“Carlos!” Ashlyn shouted, coming out of the kitchen, looking every bit the hostess. Her eyes widened when she saw what Carlos had brought. “Woah,” she said in surprise, taking the other side of the box to guide it to the table. “Okay, you know it’s a potluck and not like, catering right?” The rest of the cast members stopped milling about to gather around the table in intrigue.   
“This is NOT food,” Carlos insisted, which made Seb even more confused.   
“Oh good, I thought it was pizza. Too much lactose” chimed in Big Red. Everyone laughed. They were all used to his unique brand of humor by this point. Carlos undid the velcro, revealing an elaborate homemade board game. They all gasped.   
“What is that?” Big Red asked as everyone started admiring the handiwork.   
“This is something I’ve been waiting many long years to share with the world,” Carlos began. Seb squeezed in next to Carlos in a kneeling position. Everyone had fallen to the ground to table height and Carlos was the only one left standing, all the attention on him. For someone who so often shrank from the spotlight, he’d really learned how to be comfortable commanding a room. “You guys, this is High School Musical, the Choosical!” he squealed.   
“The what now?” Ashlyn asked with amazement. Everyone looked around at each other, processing what was in front of them.   
“Okay, so when I was a child, I wanted to go into the movie,” Carlos explained. “But the movie was on a screen.”   
“He’s not wrong,” Seb added. It was a sentiment Seb wholeheartedly related to. Everyone was still looking up at Carlos expectantly.   
“So, I decided to create the next best thing. An interactive, hyperactive HSM experience that could be played by children and adults everywhere in the world...as long as they lived in my bedroom.” Carlos pitched this as everyone flipped through the cards and game pieces as if he had been practicing for years in front of his mirror. Which Seb supposed he had.   
“Wait, so you’ve had this for 10 years?” Big Red asked, echoing Seb’s thoughts.   
“And I’ve never actually played it,” Carlos admitted.   
“Okay, we’ll totally play it,” Ashlyn said eagerly. Seb nodded in agreement.   
“I’m gonna cry!” Carlos sighed in relief. Everyone laughed with joy to see their choreographer so happy.   
There was a mad rush to divide into teams. Seb noticed that Ashlyn followed Big Red to the Knight’s team. That was suspicious- he would have to ask her about it later. Seb paused for a long moment, not wanting to have to pick a side. His first instinct was to go where Carlos did, but he was moderating so he wasn’t playing.   
“Hey, Seb, why don’t you join us?” Nini asked, squishing into the couch on the Wildcats’ team. He nodded and settled himself on the floor next to her.   
“Okay, okay, you guys, okay,” Carlos shouted over the noise once everyone was settled. “There are four basic categories: The Getcha Head in the Frame trivia challenge, The Bop Til You Drop dance challenge, the Stick to Status Quo lip sync challenge…” there was a slight pause because Carlos felt the need to explain the next category, “...and looking for Glee, which I thought would be a fun name for the singing challenge because I was obsessed with the show.” There were laughs throughout the room, and Seb smirked to imagine young Carlos bopping around to the Glee soundtrack.   
“Hey, it still holds up,” EJ agreed. He was sitting between Seb and Carlos.   
“Oh, good, I thought you guys were going to judge me,” Carlos admitted. Everyone, especially Seb, rolled their eyes at Carlos’s lack of faith in them.   
The Knights went first, doing a hilarious rendition of “What I’ve Been Looking for” to the rhythm of “Getcha Head in the Game”. It was one of the most entertaining things Seb had ever seen.   
“That was terrible,” EJ laughed.   
“I’m so happy,” Seb muttered between laughs. He had never been in a room with people who loved the musical as much as him before.   
Gameplay continued for a while. EJ and Ricky had to do Sharpay and Ryan’s warm-up while looking at each other in the eyes, and Seb thought they might have to do it in the show because it was the funniest thing he’d ever seen. The game passed by super quickly because they were all having so much fun. The energy in the room was very high but in the best way. Seb thought that as far as meaningful cast memories went, this one was one for the books. There was no drama, no sadness, only pure exhilaration and love and admiration for each other’s skillsets. He would’ve gladly played all night or forever, but eventually, they came to the end. The teams were tied, however, so they all looked at the game maker for what to do next.   
“Okay you guys,” Carlos announced. “According to the Musical Choosical Handbook of Rulesicals, the only way to resolve a tie at the end of regulation play is with a lightning speed round of…” he placed his hand on a card from the stack, “Getcha Head in the Frame trivia questions.” He yanked the card from the table, holding it up to his chest away from the players. “Are you ready?” Carlos asked for dramatic effect. “People have been known to cry during this.”   
“I thought you had never actually played it?” Seb asked good-naturedly. If Carlos was going to be in a playful mood, Seb might as well join.   
“Honey, not today of all days,” Carlos shot back exasperatedly. Seb swore his heart stopped for a minute. He blushed profusely and reeled back at the nickname, feeling someone’s hand on his shoulder. Sure, Carlos called him nicknames all the time (mostly Sebby) but never in front of their friends and never ones as romantic as honey. Seb didn’t have time to think about it though, because Carlos immediately launched into the round of trivia.   
The Knights ended up winning, thanks to Big Red’s strangely specific movie knowledge, and Gina’s fascination with Martha Cox. She popped, locked, and jammed, winning the final point. Even though his team didn’t win, Seb still felt proud to see Gina’s excitement. Gina got her mom on the phone as Carlos pinned a ribbon on her chest.   
“Say Happy Thanksgiving to my mom,” Gina requested.   
“Happy Thanksgiving!” they all chimed.   
“Oh, same to all you,” her mom replied. “Gina, honey could you take me off speaker?” Suddenly, it seemed like the air got sucked out of the room at her tone. They looked around awkwardly as Gina escaped to the kitchen to finish the conversation in privacy. The cast kept talking, but it was a much tenser, subdued banter than before. They drifted off even more as Gina left the kitchen where they couldn’t see her. Obviously, whatever she was hearing was intense, and not making her happy.   
Seb’s heart throbbed for her, knowing how hard of a time she had already had this year. To think that he had noticed that she was just starting to become comfortable around the cast. Ricky left the room, soon followed by Nini.   
Nini came back after only a minute, obviously dejected but trying to keep up the light atmosphere.   
“Ricky and Gina had to leave,” she mumbled. Everyone nodded, figuring that was the case. Sensing that the party had been killed, they silently decided it was time to clean up. People started to trickle out, saying their goodbyes and wishing each other one more Happy Thanksgiving. Ashlyn, Big Red, Carlos, and Seb, all started to gather all the pieces for the game. Nini came over like she was going to join them.   
“You don’t have to help,” Seb told her.   
“Oh, no I want to,” she immediately shot back. Their eyes met, and Seb saw the pain underneath them. He was instantly reminded of that day in the storage room. It seems like there was some more boy drama going on. He supposed it wouldn’t be a theater party without some drama, though.   
“Ready to go?” Carlos asked Seb once the game was collected and neatly folded. Seb nodded and took one end of the board.   
“Bye!” Ashlyn called as the two boys made their way across the house.   
“Bye!” Carlos called back.   
“Thanks for the party!” Seb added right before they slipped out the door.   
“That was fun,” Seb quipped as soon as the game was safely secured in the back and he was buckled up in the passenger seat.   
“Yeah?” Carlos grinned as he pulled out onto the road. Seb nodded in the rearview mirror. Carlos relaxed imperceptibly.   
“I just hope Gina is okay,” Seb gulped, acknowledging Carlos’s worries.   
“Me too, that did not sound like a happy phone call,” Carlos gritted his teeth nervously. There was a long pause after that, neither boy knowing what to say next.   
The whole car ride home was quiet, actually. Not necessarily in a bad way, but in a tired and dampened way. Seb didn’t want Carlos to think that the way things had ended reflected on his game. He remembered with a start how confidently Carlos had called him honey. He was working up the nerve to ask him about it when they pulled into his driveway. Seb shut his eyes briefly and gulped as Carlos glided into park.   
“Did you really have fun?” Carlos asked. He turned, his eyes boring into Seb’s. Seb ‘s heart dropped when he saw the desperation on Carlos’s face. Why hadn’t he just said something already?   
“Yes! Oh my gosh! That was the most fun I’ve had in so long,” Seb told him honestly. Carlos’s eyes lit up with relief when he saw the genuine enthusiasm on Seb’s face. Before he lost the nerve, Seb placed his hand on the center console. “But…” he started.   
“But what?” Carlos spat, panicking at the hesitation in Seb’s voice. The heat in the car flared, sending Seb into retreat mode. He couldn’t make a big deal out of this. What if it led to something? Seb had thought he was ready for it, had dreamed about it for months, but now that it was actually a possibility he felt like he might throw up.   
“Nothing,” Seb mumbled, looking back down at the ground.   
“No,” Carlos chirped, pulling Seb’s hand back towards him. Seb’s head popped back up at the commandment in Carlos’s tone. “Something’s obviously bothering you. Spill.” His brown eyes were challenging, but not threatening. Seb sighed, figuring he might as well bite the bullet.   
“You called me honey,” he breathed. He started to release his breath but paused at the stunned look in Carlos’s eyes.   
“Oh, Seb,” Carlos sighed, processing the information. “I didn’t really mean for that to slip out. Did- did it make you uncomfortable?” The last phrase was so soft. Seb was impressed by the steadiness of Carlos’s voice. If he would’ve asked that, his voice would’ve been shaking.   
“No,” Seb assured him. “It just caught me off guard.” Carlos nodded in understanding, and Seb finally relaxed now that he had the words out in the open.   
“So you don’t mind me calling you nicknames like that?” Carlos asked after a beat. Seb shook his head, glad he didn’t have to summarize this conversation.   
“No, I liked it,” Seb smiled. “As long as I’m the only one,” he teased, addressing the fact that Carlos never seemed to slip around anyone else. To Seb’s chagrin, though, Carlos took the request literally.   
“Well, of course. You’re just so cute sometimes I can’t help myself.” Carlos paused for a minute like he wanted to take them back, but leaned into it when he saw the pleased look on Seb’s face. Seb could feel his face grow hot. How was he supposed to respond when Carlos made comments like that? Seb opened his mouth to respond, but Carlos cut him off. “Take the compliment,” he said, and Seb laughed in surprise. He was sort of thrilled they were at the point where they could guess what each other were going to say.   
“Okay, okay,” Seb grinned. He supposed that was his cue to make a graceful exit. “Thanks for the ride.”   
“Of course,” Carlos said as Seb turned to push open the door. “Thanks for being my date.” Seb whipped around, his heart halted in his chest. Carlos’s eyes widened as he realized then what he had said, but Seb calmed himself before Carlos could formulate a response.   
“Anytime,” Seb smirked, reaching over and squeezing Carlos’s hand once before practically bounding out of the vehicle. His heart raced as he rushed up the steps, looking back only once to see Carlos’s dopey smile in the porch light.   
The car’s engine kicked into gear as Seb shivered against the cold. He heard Carlos start to back out before slipping in the front door. He stood right in the doorway for a minute, catching his breath. That answered one of his questions at least but led the way for only about a million more.


	8. Do you ever feel like there’s a whole other person inside of you just waiting to come out? (ep 8)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode 8 of HSMTM:TS from Seb's perspective. The gang moves to the El Ray and they start to discover new strengths and weaknesses. Seb realizes just how deep his feelings are.

December 2, 2019  
Monday came both very quickly and very slowly at the same time. Not only was Seb curious about what tech week had in store, but he also wasn’t sure if he should be nervous to see Carlos in person again. They had left their last conversation so awkwardly. What if Carlos was scared off and didn’t want to be his friend anymore? Or worse, what if Carlos thought Seb didn’t feel the same way and he started to retreat? He pulled out his phone as he was walking towards his first-period class to distract himself from this line of thought, but it only made it worse.  
~ come to the auditorium ASAP. you need to see this ~ Carlos’s text read. Seb felt a tingle along his spine. That tone didn’t sound good at all. Halting in his tracks, he spun around and made a beeline towards the auditorium. His stomach felt like a rock rolling around in his gut. He had no way to prepare himself whatever was about to face.  
A crowd was already starting to gather in front of the theater when he got there, peering in through the gaping hole in the wall. Wait, what? Seb crept forward to see that their beautiful stage was in ashes. He halted, stunned. He thought for a minute this might be a nightmare, but he felt Carlos come up to stand beside him.  
“Oh my gosh! What happened?” Nini asked. Her tone sounded just as shell-shocked as Seb felt.  
“It’s okay, nobody was hurt,” Miss Jenn said, approaching the cast. “There was just a small fire in the theater over the holiday, and the sprinklers did their job.” She was obviously trying to keep everyone calm, even though it was clear she was pretty shaken too.  
“We’re almost done in here,” a deep-voiced female firefighter came to stand next to Miss Jenn before anyone else collected themselves to speak up. “Just have to finish up in the faculty room next,” she said. “Some circuits blew in there over the break.” Miss Jenn turned around, and even without seeing her face, Seb could tell she was freaking out about the smoking basketball in the woman’s hands. “Unfortunately, the show cannot go on,” she continued bluntly. Those words were the ones that finally jolted the cast out of their stupor. They looked around at each other in shared anguish, shifting uncomfortably and listening to process the implications of everything before them. Seb felt a wave of nausea pass through him.  
“Oh my god,” he gasped under his breath, as the firefighter explained that their costumes and sets had been damaged, and they would have to shut down the theater for at least a month. The timing couldn’t have been horrible. The lady handed Miss Jenn the smoking basketball and promptly disappeared. There was a slight pause before Miss Jenn turned back around to address the group.  
“Okay, okay, listen up,” she started softly, “hug your neighbor, take a moment, and let’s reconvene in the cafeteria after school to talk about options. Nini and Ricky, spread the word,” she requested of her leading couple.  
“Yeah, got it of course,” Nini nodded immediately.  
“Ricky?” Miss Jenn prompted quietly. He was looking down at his phone, obviously checked out. Seb would’ve felt rude being on his phone at a moment like this, but everyone dealt with things their own way, he guessed. “Ricky?” she said louder when he still didn’t look up.  
“Huh? Sorry. After school in the cafeteria, got it,” Ricky recited, finally jolting back into the conversation.  
“See you later,” Miss Jenn sighed, brushing past them and away from the scene of the accident. There was an awkward pause before the cast turned to each other, breaking away to go collect themselves.  
“Are you okay?” Seb asked, turning to Carlos. He reached up to place his hand on Carlos’s shoulder but stopped when he saw the look on his face. His fists were clenched, and he seemed like he was ready to run into a wall.  
“I need a minute,” Carlos murmured. Before Seb could calm him down, he turned and shuffled away, leaving Seb standing there with his mouth agape, his heart in his throat. 

Seb found it very hard to focus on schoolwork that day. He was shaken and heartbroken, but mostly he was worried about Carlos. He wasn’t at lunch, he wasn’t returning texts, and Seb didn’t think it was a good idea to try to find him. He figured Carlos would come to him when he was ready. They would see each other after school, after all. The thought of that, though, made Seb feel shaky all over again. For all he knew, Carlos didn’t want to talk to him again after Thursday. He probably thought it was a mistake to be friends with Seb in the first place.  
Nevertheless, Seb tried to hold his head up as he entered the cafeteria. He was one of the last ones there, so it was easy to spot the rest of the cast huddled anxiously at the back of the room. He saw Carlos first of course. Seb slinked over, unsure if he should approach him or not. He eventually settled himself on the table across from Carlos’s- close enough that they could talk but not right next to each other.  
“Hey,” a voice breathed as Seb was setting down his backpack. He looked up to see Carlos smiling shakily at him.  
“Hey,” Seb grimaced back, slowly sliding around to face the other boy. Carlos flinched at the apprehension on Seb’s face.  
“Did I do something?” Carlos asked worriedly. Immediately, Seb softened his features. Carlos must not have meant to blow him off.  
“No, no!” Seb cried. “I thought you were avoiding me!” Carlos looked taken aback for a moment, and then his eyes widened.  
“Oh, no, I’m sorry,” Carlos apologized genuinely. “I did really only need a minute. I went to the bathroom for like, 2 minutes, and then went to class. I…. didn’t want everyone to see me that shaken.” Seb tilted his head at this. He really hoped Carlos hadn’t taken it upon himself to carry this for the whole cast.  
“I don’t think anyone would have cared,” Seb pointed out in understanding. “We were all pretty distraught.”  
“Yeah,” Carlos agreed. “I just didn’t want to go off on anyone, especially you.” He looked up at Seb with fear in his eyes, and Seb realized just how deep that anxiety went. His heart melted for Carlos at that moment.  
“C’mere,” Seb murmured, standing up and closing the distance between them. Carlos leaped up and gratefully took the hug when he saw Seb’s open arms. They stood there for a long minute, letting themselves enjoy the intimacy for once instead of pulling away. It was the longest hug they’d had, and when they broke away, Seb could smell Carlos’s scent on him. He tried not to blush, hoping that the warmth of the room would hide his rising temperature.  
“So this wasn’t about what happened on Thursday?” Seb asked, realizing that the source of his insecurities went back further than this morning.  
“What?” asked Carlos, stumbling back. “No, Thursday was great.” Seb’s shoulders relaxed to know that they were on the same page. They stared at each other for a long moment, creating a pause in the conversation. “Did you not like how it ended?” Carlos finally asked. Seb could read between the lines- did he like what was happening between them?  
“No, I liked it. I like what we have,” Seb said quickly. Carlos’s eyes lit up. They stepped closer to each other, but before they could meet, Nini was standing between them.  
“Hey, guys. I’m pretty sure that everyone’s here…..,” she chirped, then gasped when she realized she had interrupted something. “Oh, I’m sorry,” she mumbled, taking a step back. She looked back and forth between them, causing Seb to blush.  
“It’s fine,” Carlos chuckled, at the same time Seb said, “Hey Nini.” She smiled at them, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. Seb could tell something was wrong.  
“Hey are you okay?” he asked. She looked over at him gratefully, her mask of calm instantly falling away. Tears pooled in her eyes, and Seb’s heart panged for her.  
“Oh Nini,” he breathed, placing his hand on her shoulder.  
“It’s just a lot,” she admitted. Seb felt honored she was so willing to open up to them. He tried to express his understanding with a look.  
“C’mere,” Carlos said. She leaned forward, and he pulled them all into a hug. They rested their foreheads on each other. Seb felt very comforted by the feeling of his best friends’ arms wrapped around him. He looked down at their sneakered feet.  
“We’re here if you want to talk,” Seb whispered. He felt her nod her head slightly.  
“You’re amazing, Nini. Don’t let this get you down,” Carlos added, tightening his grip. Seb raised his eyebrows, resisting the urge to look up at the other boy. Carlos’s tone sounded almost reverent. It struck a chord in Seb. He wasn’t jealous- he knew Carlos didn’t like Nini like that- but he hadn’t thought that the three of them could be friends. Before he could say this out loud, Miss Jenn’s voice boomed through the cafeteria, breaking their moment.  
“Okay guys,” Miss Jenn clapped her hands to get their attention. Carlos, Seb, and Nini all sprang apart, scattering to different sides of the room. “Wait, where’s Gina?” their teacher asked, sensing the lack of an important presence in the room. Seb’s heart throbbed again for his friend. It did not seem like Gina was going through a happy time.  
“I think she’s going through a family thing right now,” Ashlyn replied immediately. Just like her character, she always took it upon herself to know everyone’s whereabouts.  
“Okay, prayers to our Gina,” Miss Jenn replied as everyone settled into a seat around the tables. “I’m not really sure what to say,” she started. The cast shifted uncomfortably in their seats. “You’ve all worked so hard, and I’ve seen all of you grow so much. But, if we don’t have a theater, we don’t have a show.” She said these words as if she were ripping off a band-aid, not wanting to delay the inevitable.  
“Wait? What?” There were ripples of confusion and discontent throughout the cast. Despite the odds, they had all been holding onto hope of redemption. There was no way their show could be over!  
“Come on Miss Jenn, we’ve got to do something,” Carlos said in desperation over the chatter.  
“I think we… I don’t know. I guess we could consider other venues?” Miss Jenn was grasping at straws, panicked at the idea of letting them all down. There were sounds of agreement as they all latched onto the idea. But where would they perform?  
“Oh, what about the old Kingston downtown?” Ashlyn asked, always quick to offer up a solution.  
“It’s condemned,” Miss Jenn reminded her solemnly.  
“The Lucky Ducky Puppet Pavillion?” EJ proposed.  
“It’s a massive Starbucks now,” Miss Jenn sighed in contempt.  
“What about the El Ray?” Carlos asked suddenly. There were gasps of excitement. The El Ray was really well known in the Salt Lake area- if they could get in, it would be an awesome opportunity! They all perked up, onboard with the idea, except for Miss Jenn apparently.  
“Any other ideas?” she asked. They all looked up in confusion. Why wasn’t she as hyped as they were?  
“Miss Jenn, I feel like you just had a really weird reaction to what I just said,” Carlos observed. His eyebrows knit in confusion.  
“Sorry, what did you just say?” Miss Jenn asked, trying to play off her apprehension to the idea.  
“Carlos is asking if we can try to use the El Ray theater,” Nini summarized. That was good she stepped in- if Miss Jenn was going to listen to anyone, it would be Nini.  
“My Uncle Ruben is the listing agent,” Carlos stood up from his seat. “And the last thing they had in there was a fashion show, like, four years ago.” He got up and brushed past Miss Jenn, presumably to make a phone call to his uncle. Seb looked down at his phone and saw the website he had pulled up had finally loaded.  
“Woah, this place has 500 seats!” he gasped. The cast all leaned in closer to see the pictures.  
“That’s actually pretty sweet,” EJ mused. Just as Miss Jenn was saying how unlikely she thought getting into the El Ray would be, Carlos started speaking in rapid Spanish. Seb’s head shot up in surprise. He knew Carlos was Hispanic, and that he probably spoke a little Spanish at home, but he hadn’t actually heard him speak it, or know that he was so fluent. It made Seb feel happy to see this other side of Carlos and also made him want to learn more about Carlos’s family because they really didn’t talk about it at all.  
“Si, si, si,” Ruben said to Carlos’s question. They all looked around at each other in astonishment.  
“Sounded like a yes to me!” Ashlyn said. This was met by cheers all around. Well, except for Miss Jenn, but Seb couldn’t blame her if she was having an off day.  
“The El Ray theater it is!” she said after a moment, eliciting another round of cheers. Before it died down, Miss Jenn seemed to realize she needed to take control of the situation. “Wildcats, let’s grab all of the props and costumes that didn’t get damaged, and let’s load out!” Immediately, everyone scattered, fueled by a new burst of energy at the idea of having a beautiful venue to play at. 

“On your right, heads up!” Seb called as he and Ashlyn raced down the hall with a ladder. You would think that loading up an entire theater would be boring, but they were making a game of it of sorts. They were all eager to get it done as quickly as possible.  
“Don’t apologize, this is like, a weird adventure,” Ashlyn said from behind him, laughing along. Despite the circumstances, the cast seemed to be in great spirits. They could probably make anything fun. Carlos was stressing Seb out a little bit, but he hoped that he would calm down once they got settled.  
Speaking of the choreographer, Carlos came hustling out of the doors as soon as Ashlyn and Seb finished loading the ladder into one of the trucks. He was holding something in his arms like a baby. They stepped towards him curiously.  
“Let’s go,” Carlos said, making a beeline towards his car. Seb and Ashlyn rushed to follow him. He threw the cargo in the trunk, and Seb climbed into the passenger seat and Ashlyn into the back.  
“What was that?” Seb asked as Carlos pulled out of the parking spot.  
“Nothing,” Carlos’s fingers gripped the steering wheel. Seb knew he was lying, but figured he had a good reason, so he didn’t press him. He just belted show tunes with two best friends and tried to forget about the craziness of the day. 

They pulled into the El Ray about 20 minutes later. Seb was taken aback because it looked much more run-down than in the pictures. He tried not to be disappointed because at least they had a venue to play in. The fact that Carlos had gotten them in so quickly was honestly amazing.  
They met up with the rest of the cast at the front door and they all crept in together. The lobby was standard, if a little musty, but backstage was completely dark. Miss Jenn and Carlos led the way with flashlights. Seb blinked, trying to adjust to the lack of light. He thought he heard Miss Jenn say something about a tetanus shot? He shook it off, trying not to shiver as he stepped onto the rickety stage.  
It took a moment for them to find the light board. The cast all stood there milling in the dark. Seb felt Ashlyn’s hand on his shoulder and he whipped around.  
“I’ll be right back,” she said, looking towards the front of the stage.  
“Where are you going?” he asked her. Suddenly, she seemed to turn uncharacteristically shy.  
“To talk to Big Red,” she mumbled. Seb’s eyes widened in understanding.  
“Ohhhhhh,” he sang teasingly, and Ashlyn lunged for him.  
“It’s not like that,” she hissed.  
“Okay,” he said, just rolling his eyes and turning to talk to Rico about one of their scenes they still needed to nail down. The lights came up then, and Miss Jenn popped back on the stage. She traveled around, checking in with some people before addressing the group.  
“Okay! Let’s have some real talk!” she started, strolling to the front of the stage. Seb spun around on the crate he was sitting on to face her. “Welcome to tech rehearsal! I don’t know if you noticed, but most of the tech in this particular theater appears to be hand-cranked. Natalie Bagley, my dear, my stage manager, this is your chance to be the hero.” Her voice echoed throughout the empty theater. Everyone looked around then awkwardly, realizing that the most important person for a tech rehearsal wasn’t there. “What is it? What’s happening?” Miss Jenn asked, clearly panicking at their reactions.  
“Natalie Bagley’s getting her wisdom teeth out,” Seb told her gently, remembering a post he had seen that morning. It was horrible timing, really. He wouldn’t want to be in Miss Jenn’s place right now.  
“Okay, okay, I’m down a stage manager, my Taylor’s MIA,” she said. Before she could finish her spiral, Ricky cut her off.  
“Gina’s okay. She’s a fighter and she’ll be back for opening night,” he claimed a little boldly.  
“Did she text you?” Nini asked. Seb was sitting right next to them, and honestly, he felt uncomfortable with how intensely she and Ricky were staring in each other’s eyes. He thought they were over, but he should’ve known he wasn’t caught up with all drama.  
“No, you?” Ricky asked. Nini shook her head, about to say something when there was a loud crash. They all screamed and Seb leaped back as a heavy sandbag landed on the stage right in front of them. Seb couldn’t ignore how run-down the theater was now.  
“Totally normal, just heads up from now on,” Miss Jenn suggested unhelpfully after a moment of stunned silence. “Big Red, do you know how to hang a light?”  
“I know how to hang out?” the stagehand replied, caught off guard by the question. They all laughed at the absurdity of the situation.  
“Cool,” Miss Jenn mumbled when it was clearly the opposite. She started assigning people places to be, eager to just get started. “Clear the stage, let’s go,” she clapped her hands together and they all scattered.  
“Okay, we just need to nail down our lighting and our sound, and ta-da, we’ve got a show,” Miss Jenn said once the lights were set and the stage was empty. “We need bodies for the rooftop scene.”  
“I can do Troy,” EJ offered from the audience. Seb’s head perked up for a moment at this. EJ had never willingly offered to do anything. Was he actually being a decent person for once? Before Seb could question it further, the lights flashed again. It was a bright blue color, and a neon glow shone from backstage, causing EJ and Carlos to yelp and jump back in fright.  
“Sorry everyone,” Carlos called from his spot on the stage. “My Uncle Ruben said there was gonna be some leftover stuff from the fashion show. I guess the theme was 80s rave?”  
“In a nuclear reactor?” Ashlyn guessed, addressing that the costumes were all forms of construction gear. The light went back up though, and EJ and Carlos started the scene.  
Carlos was standing in for Gabriella, obviously uncomfortable with his acting ability. He read the lines fast and without inflection, just staring down at his script the whole time. EJ, however, seemed to be taking a completely different approach.  
“I never thought about singing, that’s for sure,” he said, leaning forward. There were actual tears in his eyes. What the hell? Carlos looked up at him in bewilderment, clearly uncomfortable. Seb’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. “And now, I don’t wanna stop. Ever.” EJ wrapped his hand around Carlos’s neck. The choreographer gave him the blankest look, but Seb still felt his blood boil. EJ was standing a little too close for comfort. He was probably straight as a board, and not trying to steal Seb’s man, but this behavior still made Seb feel protective anyway. It was just too bizarre to be funny, but the rest of the cast was highly amused. A part of him wanted them to just go home at this point because he didn’t think he could handle any more drama today.  
“Okay, this isn’t working,” Miss Jenn said after a ladder fell, shaking them all from their state of confusion. “Let’s take five and reconvene.” Seb dropped his shoulders in relief. He needed to talk to Carlos and shake off whatever weird feeling had just possessed him. He started to make a beeline towards the stage, but Carlos was pulled away immediately by Miss Jenn. Seb froze in the middle of the pathway, sighing dejectedly.  
“Hey, Seb, wanna work on lines?” Rico asked from behind. Seb turned around slowly, forcing himself to smile. Which wasn’t hard but he didn’t want to let on how stressed he was.  
They settled on the edge of the stage, but before they could get very far they were distracted by the sound of a strong, beautiful alto voice drifting through the theater. Seb poked his head up and saw with surprise that it was Kourtney.  
He stood up and joined the crowd gathering around as she riffed to “Bop to Top”. With every line, she grew louder, more confident, and added a little more flavor. Seb was truly astonished by her talent. Why had she kept this hidden the whole time? He smiled to see her light up. It was about time she got her moment to shine!  
She hit the last note, and the mic screamed with feedback, although that was probably more the system’s fault than Kourtney’s. They all broke out into applause, overcome with pleasant surprise. Miss Jenn in particular seemed very excited at this development. Something pricked at the back of Seb’s consciousness as he talked to Rico, but he couldn’t quite figure out what it was.  
“Okay, everyone follow me. We’re going to take, Ummm… a long five?” The tone in Carlos’s voice completely erased whatever train of thought Seb had been having. He went to collect his stuff, but by the time he turned around, Carlos was gone. 

He spent a good 20 minutes searching for Carlos but to no avail. The other boy knew the theater way better than Seb did. He could be anywhere. Seb tried not to let it bug him that it felt like Carlos was avoiding him.  
When Seb circled back into the lobby, he saw a familiar face sitting on the stairs doodling. He stood there a minute watching Kourtney, hoping it wasn’t creepy. He was so proud of her, but there was also something underneath it that Seb couldn’t place. She deserved her chance to be in the spotlight after helping them look so good. What if she quit the crew to be in the show? Suddenly, Seb realized what his apprehension was. It was fear. He had gotten used to the idea of Kourtney turning him into Sharpay. He didn’t want to lose the feeling that gave him, and he didn’t really trust anyone else to try it. Taking a deep breath, he marched over to her. She looked up at Seb as he approached.  
“Hey, um, I heard you singing earlier,” he said, resting his hands on the banister.  
“Oh yeah?” Kourtney smiled.  
“You’re not gonna quit make-up crew, are you?” he asked. Better to just ask the question, he figured. He couldn’t quite read the expression on her face. She paused for a minute in contemplation. “Sorry, I know you’re multi-talented or whatever,” he added, not wanting her to feel conflicted or guilty. “I just think you have a gift for making things look better. I mean, the Sharpay make-up? You made me look the way I feel.” Seb instantly felt better expressing this out loud. Sharpay made him braver, somehow. He should’ve been scared of how vulnerable he felt in the role, but it gave him the confidence that drove all of his decisions this year. Kourtney beamed at the compliment, too.  
“Well, I’m not gonna quit my day job,” she replied. “But I don’t like categories. Why limit yourself to one thing, right?”  
“Right, cool,” Seb breathed, nodding in relief. He was glad she wasn’t quitting make-up, but he understood what she was saying. The joy of theater was that it allowed him to express himself in so many different ways. It was an inspiration to Seb to see Kourtney expanding her toolbox. “The singing was amazing too,” he told her, worried he hadn’t made it clear enough before. “I mean, you can do anything.”  
“I know that, Sebby. And you can too,” she replied. Seb was taken aback by the compliment. She was so confident; he needed to draw off of that a little bit too.  
“Okay,” he blushed, then chuckled and walked away. The conversation was nearly enough for Seb to forget about Carlos, but not quite. He still kept his eye out, and sure enough, he soon caught a glimpse of familiar dark hair across the room.  
“I’ll be back,” he told Stephy, and then excused himself to find Carlos before he disappeared again.  
Carlos turned slightly when he heard Seb coming. His feet were frozen in place, a stunned expression on his face.  
“I think EJ just complimented me,” Carlos told him, slowly coming unstuck.  
“Really? What did he say?” Seb asked. He hadn’t even realized EJ had been over here. A second later, though, he realized that his surprise might be offensive. “I mean, of course he did,” he corrected. Carlos smiled slightly at that but shifted uncomfortably.  
“He said he admired how I’ve stepped it up,” Carlos mumbled in response to Seb’s original question. He choked like he didn’t want to admit it because he was as bad at taking compliments as Seb was, but Seb could tell there was a part of him that was secretly pleased.  
“Well, he’s right,” Seb insisted, coming to stand even closer to Carlos. The choreographer looked over at him gratefully.  
“Maybe EJ isn’t so bad,” Carlos admitted, looking off in the direction that EJ had gone. Seb paused for a minute to think about this. His feelings about EJ had been…. rocky? He had never really felt like he connected with him, but if he noticed what Seb had noticed in Carlos, Seb had to give him credit. There were obviously deeper layers underneath. Maybe, with a little push, he could actually be a thoughtful guy.  
“Yeah,” Seb agreed. But then he remembered why he had wanted to come to talk to Carlos in the first place. “That whole rooftop scene was weird though. What was that about?”  
“Oh,” Carlos gasped, turning back to look at Seb. He paused for a brief second as if debating how much to say. “He read Miss Jenn’s auditions files. Apparently they said he lacked emotional connection.” Seb laughed at the sarcastic way Carlos said it. He hadn’t expected that to be the reason, but it did make a lot of sense.  
“Oh,” Seb breathed, visibly relaxing. Carlos paused for a second, hit with a sudden realization.  
“Sebby… were you jealous?” he teased. Seb blushed bright red, and Carlos’s eyes lit up with vindication.  
“Shut up,” Seb chuckled, leaning in against Carlos. He reached in the bag of popcorn and pulled out a handful to distract Carlos.  
“I wouldn’t eat that if were you-” Carlos started to warn him, but it was too late. It was already in Seb’s mouth. He made a face at the stale flavor. He had to resist the urge to spit it out. “I told you,” Carlos sighed, but Seb just rolled his eyes and reached in for more because he was stubborn and because stale popcorn was better than no popcorn. Begrudgingly, Carlos shared, and they finished the bag in minutes. Seb was happy they didn’t have to talk about what had happened today, but he knew that they were just delaying the inevitable. Carlos would realize soon how seriously Seb had been jealous, for better or for worse.


	9. When We're Underneath the Lights, Our Hearts Are No Longer Broken (ep. 9)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode 9 of HSMTMTS from Seb's perspective. It's opening night and Seb and Carlos are no longer only mixed up in their own drama, but in other castmate's drama as well.  
> This is basically my love letter to theater because I go into a lot of detail about Seb's performance day rituals. He slays his dance with the help of Carlos's encouragement, of course.

December 7, 2019  
Backstage on opening night was absolute chaos by the time Seb got there. There were actors sitting on counters, fixing each other’s makeup, doing vocal warm-ups, searching down costume pieces, and generally just trying to release oodles of nervous energy. The tech crew had their job cut out for them as well, trying to set up lights and sound in their new set-up in the gym. Show tunes blared through the dressing room as Seb searched for his rack. He wiggled into his tight pants and kept his undershirt on to get his make-up and hair done. He chatted with Stephy while he was waiting for Kourtney to help him. (Boys and girls were all in the same dressing room- they had all gotten comfortable changing in front of each other, besides they were all wearing undergarments and none of them really cared about preserving modesty anyway.)  
Eventually, Kourtney came over and stiffened his hair with glitter and hairspray and painted his face, and Seb felt much more like himself. There was still a pit in his stomach that was growing larger by the minute as the reality of the curtain rising set in, but now that he had his game face on he could channel Sharpay and just think about the part.  
“30 minutes,” Natalie called, barging into the room just as Kourtney stepped away from Seb.  
“Speak now or forever hold your face,” Kourtney told the room. Seb flipped around to face her.  
“Why? Where are you going to be during the show?” he asked. He didn’t trust himself not to mess up her work, so he needed her on call at all times. Before she could answer though, Miss Jenn came into the room.  
“My beautiful babies!” she cried, clapping her hands together to get their attention. “Let’s all gather around for some housekeeping. First of all, who brought Versailles?” she asked in reference to the giant mountain of flowers someone had received as a bouquet.  
“No one knows,” Carlos chuckled. There had been quite a commotion trying to track down who had sent them. They all assumed they were for Nini. By now, everyone had gathered around in a large circle.  
“Well, I suppose we’ll just have to share then,” Miss Jenn mused. “Speaking of sharing, most of you know that our dazzling Taylor had to leave under family circumstances. Gina sends her love and support to all of you, but unfortunately, she’s on the East Coast and won’t be able to make it to tonight’s performance. And so, I have asked Kourtney to fill in her stead.” There was a long moment of cheers for Kourtney at this moment. That made perfect sense! Seb couldn’t think of anyone else more deserving or someone who could pull this off as quickly as Kourtney. Miss Jenn spoke again once the applause had died down. “And now, what I’d like to do is please think of a word or phrase from the show that expresses where your head is or your goals for tonight. If anyone wants to share?” There was a moment of silence as everyone pondered this.  
“You’re my guys, and this is our team,” Big Red started, breaking the ice.  
“What if you want to try something really new, and it’s a total disaster and all your friends laugh at you?” Ricky said next. Seb smiled nostalgically as he remembered that day at auditions where Ricky had shown up frantically halfway through and basically turned it into an open mic. He, and the whole cast really, had come so far since that day.  
“Do you ever feel like there’s a whole other person inside of you just waiting to come out?” Nini said next. Seb’s heart panged at that line. It was such a good one; he was so glad she had thought of it! He had always related to it, but it had never felt truer than it did right now. His whole life, he had been too afraid to let himself be who he fully was. Slowly but surely, that had changed this year, and it all cumulated to this moment. Suddenly, Seb was shaking and he had to keep himself from crying and ruining his make-up.  
“Do your romp, and strut your stuff,” Carlos said in his usual flamboyant nature. That put a smile on Seb’s face. Of course, Carlos had chosen a Sharpay quote.  
“My shower head is very impressed with me,” Kourtney chose. That would change today for her.  
“I’m proud to call you my sister,” EJ said to his cousin who was standing next to him. That was surprisingly sweet for EJ. Seb had to give him credit, he was slowly winning Seb over.  
“Awwwwwww,” Ashlyn smiled. “It’s close enough.” There were laughs throughout the room. Ashlyn said a quote, but he didn’t really hear it because he was looking around the circle. He realized it was going to have to be his turn to go.  
“Sharpay’s kinda cute too,” he blurted. It wasn’t exactly how he was feeling, but it was the first thing he thought of. And why shouldn’t he just embrace it and acknowledge that he looked good as Sharpay?  
“So is a mountain lion, but you don’t pet it,” the cast finished the line in unison. Seb’s heart felt extremely full. He was so happy to have so many inside jokes with them all. Miss Jenn took over to wrap it up then.  
“And I’ll just say, no matter what happens tonight, we’re all in this together.” There was a beat of silence as everyone took a moment to let that sink in. “Okay wildcats,” Miss Jenn continued. “Take a moment to settle your nerves. If we had a curtain, it would be up in 20 minutes!” There were cheers before everyone scattered for last-minute prep (setting props, finishing getting in costume, handing out break a leg notes). Seb put on his jacket and headed to their quick prayer circle before places. Before he knew it, the lights were flashing saying the show was about to start and Miss Jenn came to herd them all to places.  
The beginning of the show went pretty uneventfully, considering that they were still trying to work out tech issues. Kourtney did amazing; Seb didn’t think anyone in the audience would even be able to tell that she had picked up the role that week.  
They were working out the Status Quo dance break just before they had to go on when suddenly Kourtney paused. They all realized that Gina was standing right there in the doorway, cupcakes in hand. Seb followed the rest of the cast as they leaped across the dressing room to greet her. Apparently, she had gotten a last-minute flight back and was going to hide out in the gym to watch them.  
“Gina, no one in the gym wants to hide more than I do right now,” Kourtney told her. Gina looked up at her in surprise.  
“Wait, are you playing Taylor?” she asked.  
“I was and it was nice, but now it’s your turn to save my butt and do the dance,” Kourtney shot back, holding out the tray to her. “Please, I’m asking you.” There was a moment of anticipation while they all waited for Gina to accept.  
“Can I?” Gina asked Miss Jenn. The director paused like she was thinking but then dropped the face.  
“Of course, you can do the curtain call together,” she decided. “Let’s hit the halls, people!”  
Seb bounded down the hall to his spot excitedly. As much as he loved Kourtney’s version of Taylor, he was glad Gina was here. The world deserved to see her dance; she had worked so hard on it. Plus, it would take some of the attention off of Seb if he messed up his own choreography.  
The music was already building as Seb tip-toed into the wings. He started rocking back and forth on his heels to keep himself from shaking. This was his big moment- he needed to nail this. He started running through the movements in his head but he didn’t get very far before he felt a familiar hand on his shoulder. He turned around slowly and smiled. It was Carlos. They hadn’t gotten to talk at all today because of all the craziness. It wasn’t exactly that Seb was avoiding him after their conversation on Monday, but there had been so much going on that Seb hadn’t even really had the chance to think about it.  
“How are you feeling?” Carlos asked. It almost seemed if he was only asking it to be polite though or because he didn’t know what else to say.  
“Honestly, you seem more nervous than I am,” Seb admitted. Carlos had to stifle back laughter at that.  
“Well, not all of us have your unbridled confidence, Sharpay,” Carlos replied sarcastically. Hearing Carlos call him Sharpay made Seb so happy in a way he couldn’t describe. He beamed and stepped even closer to Carlos.  
“Something about this outfit does make me feel powerful,” Seb mused. Carlos raised an eyebrow at that and stepped back to look him up and down. Seb tried but failed not to blush.  
“You do look incredible,” Carlos agreed. Seb’s heart started fluttering at the soft expression on the choreographer’s face.  
“Thanks,” Seb beamed. “You do too.” Carlos’s suit was actually amazing. It was well fitted, flowery to match Seb’s, and it looked like it was soft. They smiled at each other for a moment. Even though Seb had expected it to be weird between them today, he was still extremely grateful to have Carlos as a friend.  
Suddenly, the music changed for the dance break and Seb knew he needed to get in position. “That’s my cue,” he told Carlos. Carlos nodded and smiled encouragingly.  
“Do my choreography justice like I know you will,” he requested. Before Seb could turn around, Carlos took his hand and looked him in the eyes. “You’re making history, remember that.” Seb eyes widened and it felt like a jolt of lightning had hit him. He stared at Carlos for a minute, their fingers intertwined, as he processed the weight of that concept. As it settled on his shoulders, he felt his whole body rise with energy. This was the magic of theater- there really wasn’t anything else like it. He could change other people’s lives by embracing this. He sighed and smiled gratefully at Carlos before dropping his hand and turning around to face the stage. Adrenaline and a heightened sense of the gravity of this moment coursed through Seb as he looked across the stage to Rico. The boy playing Ryan nodded, and they made their way up the stairs on opposite sides of the set just as Gina’s dance break was ending.  
Right on cue, Seb gripped the edge of the upper railing and yelled: “Everybody quiet!” From there on, Seb’s memory pretty much went completely blank as he was so focused on his character and on the steps of the dance. He must’ve pulled it off though, because as soon as he stepped offstage at the end of the song, Carlos wrapped him in a huge hug.  
“That was incredible!” the choreographer whispered. Their faces were pressed together and Seb could feel Carlos’s breath on his neck. “They loved you- listen.” Seb’s hearing seemed to come back in a sudden rush as he tuned into the cheers coming from the crowd. It felt like a dream to believe they were all for him. “You absolutely nailed it,” Carlos told him, stepping away and patting Seb on the back. Seb had to take his word for it because he knew the choreographer wouldn’t lie about that.  
Glowing with exhilaration, Seb rushed back to the dressing room with the rest of the cast. They were all on an absolute energy high. There was nothing like the feedback from a live audience.  
Seb went back to the wings after a few minutes to watch Getcha Head in the Game. It was one of his favorite numbers in the show. Carlos had absolutely hit it out of the park with his choreography. Seb stood next to the choreographer, and he could tell that they were both just enjoying spending time together.  
The dancers were all doing awesome, especially Ricky. Seb was glad to see that he was enjoying himself. He was excited that Ricky had caught the theater bug because he added a lot of great energy to the cast.  
The dancers got Ricky strapped into the harness as part of the choreography, and it went smoothly. Seb still held his breath in anticipation though as their Troy was lifted up slowly lifted up on a basketball. Thankfully, it went off without a hitch and the audience absolutely ate it up. He looked over at Carlos who was standing next to him and the choreographer was positively beaming.  
Once Ricky got to the top though, he looked down at the audience. Uh-oh, rookie mistake. His face went pale and there was a long pause before he stammered out “I’ve got the shake this, yikes.” He was lowered down to the ground, but for the rest of the song his head was decidedly NOT in the game. Seb knew what he must have been feeling. It was really easy to get thrown off your groove sometimes if you weren’t fully thinking about the show. Hopefully, it was just some nerves and he could pull himself together during intermission because this was honestly a little confusing and not like him. Seb looked over at Carlos to see his expression was equally as confused and a little hurt. The light in his eyes from earlier was completely doused. Carlos had poured his whole heart and soul into this show. Seb couldn’t imagine how frustrating watching this must be.  
“Ricky what happened at the end?” the choreographer asked as soon as Ricky stepped into the wings.  
“It’s a long story,” Ricky sighed. He looked a little dazed and much more shaken than Seb had realized.  
“Are you okay?” Seb asked, trying to get Ricky back on track in the gentlest way possible.  
“Has anyone seen Nini? I could really use a pep talk right now,” Ricky asked. Seb remembered their convo in Big Red’s basement where Ricky said he usually confided in Nini. Apparently, they had patched up their relationship enough to be back on those terms. “My mom’s new boyfriend just showed up, and I wanna punch a wall. I feel like I need a miracle to face Act Two.” Woah, okay, so Ricky was in the middle of a full-blown crisis. Emotions had been so high today that Seb couldn’t blame Ricky for spewing all of this right here. But, the boy really needed to calm down.  
“Nini’s in the quick change booth right now. She seems a little nervous,” Carlos told Ricky. Great! Seb thought sarcastically. That would definitely help the situation. Both of their leads were having mental breakdowns. He had to give all of them some grace, though. They were his friends, and they were all dealing with some tough stuff. And, sure Carlos was a little blunt but that might actually not be a bad thing in this situation.  
“Wait, why, what happened?” Ricky asked, voicing Seb’s worry. Nini had always seemed like nothing could get in the way of her performance.  
“Uh…. I thought I was doing a good thing, but I think it backfired,” replied a voice from behind them. Seb’s eyes shot over to see Kourtney coming to stand next to them. “You see that lady with the clipboard out there?” she asked. They all looked back out towards the audience where she pointing. “That’s the dean from the performing arts school she was looking at.”  
“You invited her?” Ricky asked in surprise. His voice was shaking and it caught all of their attention.  
“Ricky you look like you’re shaking. Do you need to sit down?” Kourtney asked.  
“Actually I do,” Ricky replied. “Excuse me.” He pushed through them and escaped back towards the dressing rooms. They all watched him leave worriedly but knowing there wasn’t much they could do to help him. Seb hoped that Ricky could see that they all were rooting for him to pull through, but he knew one thing at least for sure. Act 2 was going to be a wild ride.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHHH we're getting so close to the end now! Thank you for reading this far if you have, it really means a lot. 
> 
> I'm actually pretty proud of this. Episode 9 has a special place in my heart, so I hope you like this one. : )


	10. Bop to the Sky, Baby (ep. 10)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Episode 10 of HSMTM:TS from Seb's perspective. The ups and downs of Act 2 and the conversation Seb and Carlos have afterward about their relationship.

December 7, 2019 (cont.)   
Seb stood in the wings at the start of act 2. He took a deep breath, trying to recover from the cluster of intermission. He was still surprised that he had been able to get in these pants in time. He would have to make sure to walk gingerly so they wouldn’t rip.   
He looked around for Carlos, but the choreographer was nowhere to be seen. Neither was Ricky, for that matter. Seb really hoped he was doing okay, and that he would make it in time for his scene.   
The lights went down again, drowning any vision Seb had backstage. The audience went silent so the show could start.   
Nini and Gina were halfway through their scene when EJ pushed forward and came to stand next to Seb. He was ultra-focused on something, so Seb didn’t say anything to him.   
He wasn’t technically supposed to be on his phone, but since Seb was still worried about Carlos, he shot him a quick text. He could really use his emotional support right now.   
By the time he looked up, Gina and Nini’s scene was over. The girls hurried off stage in the opposite direction. EJ looked over at Seb then, and they made eye contact for the first time. For some reason, EJ looked nervous. Never in his whole life had Seb seen EJ less than poised. It made Seb’s heart race out of second-hand nervousness.   
“Are you okay?” Seb asked. EJ’s eyes widened as he realized what he must look like. His features immediately softened. Or, at least relaxed as much as possible.   
“Yeah,” EJ nodded gratefully. His hands gripped the basketball in his hands. Seb’s eyebrows raised in suspicion, but he decided not to press it.   
“Okay….” he drawled. EJ went to turn away, but Seb couldn’t resist asking the next question. “Where are Carlos and Ricky?” EJ sighed and turned back around.   
“That’s kind of a long story, actually,” he responded. Seb opened his mouth to respond when he felt a familiar figure behind him. He whipped around, and his eyes widened when he saw that Carlos was wearing one of the jerseys.   
“What-” Seb started, looking back and forth between the other two boys. He stopped himself when he realized that EJ’s costume had Troy’s number on it. Which meant- “Wait!” he gasped. Carlos smiled nervously at the surprised look on Seb’s face.   
“Surprise,” Carlos’s fingers widened into jazz hands to cover up the panic in his eyes at apparently having to play Chad.   
“What happened?” Seb asked. Of all the scenarios, he had never imagined this.   
“Ricky asked me to take over for Troy,” EJ cut in. Seb’s eyes flickered over to him startled. He had almost forgotten that EJ was even there. “Apparently he didn’t want to mess up Nini’s performance.” Both Carlos and Seb looked up at him in surprise.   
“Wait really?” Carlos asked. His eyes were shining like Seb’s with admiration for Ricky now.   
“That’s actually kind of sweet,” Seb grinned. EJ just shrugged.   
“I guess,” he agreed. Just then, Natalie came to grab EJ. He looked back at Seb and Carlos once as he was pulled onto stage.   
“Wow, so this is your real stage?” Nini recited as she strolled onstage from the other side. She froze when she realized it was EJ approaching her and not Ricky.   
“I guess you could call it that, or just a smelly gym,” EJ came towards her. There was a pause in the dialogue as they leaned into each other to say something Seb couldn’t hear, but they quickly continued on with the scene. Not as polished as possible, but Seb was impressed with EJ's natural ease after the way he had played Troy on Monday.   
When it was Ms. Darbus and Mr. Bolton’s cue to enter, Carlos was still standing there in the wings.   
“Go,” Seb hissed, pushing him forward towards them, knowing that it was almost time for his line.   
“No, it’s all good, I’ll be getting on my way,” Nini said as Carlos came to stand next to EJ. There was a short pause as they watched her exit offstage.   
“Uh, we can stay and shoot some hoops, right, bro?” Carlos’s voice shook on his line. He nudged EJ in the arm awkwardly. Seb just had to shake his head and laugh. Thankfully, Carlos didn’t have any other lines in the scene. He collapsed into Seb once it was over. “Remind me never to do this again,” he moaned. Seb just looked at him mischievously, returning the hug.   
“I’ll be back,” Carlos sighed after a minute, breaking away. “I’ve gotta try to find Ricky because I really don’t think I can get back on that stage.”   
“Good luck,” Seb grimaced, squeezing Carlos’s shoulders before he slipped away.   
Just then, the music for Wondering started and Ashlyn’s beautiful voice rose throughout the gym. Seb smiled and turned back towards the stage to cheer her on from the wings. His heart swelled with pride to see her in her element like this. He was honestly astounded that she had written this song herself. She could have a serious career in songwriting if she wanted it. Not to mention that her belting and acting were on point as well.   
As soon as the song ended, the crowd broke out into massive applause. Seb wasn’t supposed to clap from backstage, so he just stood there beaming. Ashlyn enjoyed the last few moments of having the audience in the palm of her hand before flouncing offstage and towards Seb.   
“That was incredible Ash,” Seb told her as she passed by. She stopped and turned back towards him.   
“Thanks, Seb,” she grinned. “I saw your family by the way. They had signs and everything!”   
“Wait, what?” Seb froze. He knew his family had bought a lot of tickets, but he purposely hadn’t looked for them in the audience. Now it was probably going to throw off his performance to think about them, especially if they were going to put out signs.   
“Yeah, it’s really sweet that they’re so supportive,” Ashlyn commented, not picking up on Seb’s apprehensive tone.   
“Umm… yeah,” Seb gulped. Ashlyn raised an eyebrow at Seb’s reaction, but quickly shook it off and walked away. Before he could stop himself, his eyes automatically drifted towards the audience, and sure enough, he saw a row of blonde heads right in the middle. Pulling back, he tried to take deep breaths and prepare himself for what was going to come next time he had to go onstage.  
Too soon, the music transitioned into the beginning of Bop to Top. He must have been standing there longer than he realized because he heard someone march up to him.   
“Seb, what’s the matter?” Carlos asked as Seb spun around to face him. He was sure his face was probably white as a sheet. “The music’s been vamping so long I feel like I’m in an elevator.”   
“I don’t know if I can do this,” Seb admitted. He thought he could earlier, but his legs were so shaky now he wasn’t sure if he could even make it onstage.   
“What?” Carlos said immediately. “You are the only person who could pull this off.” Seb barely processed the words before grabbing Carlos’s shoulder and leading him to the edge of the curtain.   
“My family bought out three rows of bleachers,” Seb explained, pointing towards the audience. All he could process was the rainbow and glitter of their signs. They had really gone too far out. “I don’t want to let them down.”   
“Seb,” Carlos breathed, pulling Seb away from the audience. Their eyes locked, and Carlos’s warm brown gaze made Seb instantly relax. Seb couldn’t process his new emotions before Carlos leaned forward and gently placed a kiss on Seb’s cheek, eliciting a whole new wave of giddiness. Seriously, Carlos could not have come at a better time. “Count your blessings, and dance your heart out,” the choreographer suggested wistfully. Seb grinned at the look of faith on his best friend’s face. Carlos was right. Not only was he so loved, but they all also loved him just for himself and all the ways he expressed himself. He was so lucky to have two tribes: his biological family, and his theater family. And at this moment, he could make them both proud. He took a deep breath and turned back towards the stage. Carlos’s hands on his shoulders gave him the last bit of strength he needed. “Bop to the sky, baby,” Carlos whispered before pushing Seb out onto the stage. Seb threw his glittery blue shawl over his shoulder, strutted forward, and did just that. 

Seb stood in the wings at the start of bows, buzzing with the high of the finale. Bows were one of his absolute favorite parts of the show, and this crowd, based on the cheers, was not holding back from applause. They had had so many setbacks, including a cast change at the very end back to Ricky playing Troy, but it had all been worth it. They had pulled off something pretty spectacular.   
Seb was supposed to be carried out over the heads of the ensemble guys, and he would be lying if he wasn’t a tiny bit nervous about that underneath all of the exhilaration. They hadn’t been 100% percent sure it would work, but they managed to get him steadily up in the air. He looked up and smiled to keep himself from panicking, growing more secure as the audience came into view.   
Once he was back on the ground, he was able to have fun with the choreography with his friends. It was the first dance they had learned, per Carlos’s “learn the hardest dance first” policy, but they had come so far it felt like second nature. Not to mention that Seb had had this particular choreography memorized since he was five. It was so iconic, and Seb still couldn’t quite believe that they were doing it in front of an audience like this. It truly felt like something straight out of a movie. These were the moments that you can never get back and you never forget. The words “All in this together” had never felt more true.   
They did a final bow as an entire cast once Miss Jenn and Carlos had been dragged on for their moment, and it made Seb teary-eyed thinking about all the memories he had with each of them. Following Nini and Ricky’s rocky relationship, him and Ashlyn teasing each other about boys, bonding with Gina over dance and Kourtney about make-up, and even today’s conversation with EJ (who had apparently been the one to fly Gina out here.) There truly was nothing else in the world like sharing the fruits of their labor of love with his theater family. They all deserved their own standing ovation. The confetti at the end was a nice touch.   
As soon as the standing ovation was finally over, they all raced back to the dressing room to get ready to go greet the audience. Seb had just slipped into his more comfortable pants when he looked in the mirror and saw that Carlos was digging in the massive bouquet behind him.   
“So, who are the flowers for?” Seb asked, turning around.   
“Everybody hold,” Carlos said excitedly. “We’ve got a card, people.” He pulled out a piece of paper and started to read it. That was strange, Seb would’ve thought he would’ve found it by now. It was a really gigantic bouquet, though. “To Ashlyn, because you get me,” Carlos read out loud.   
“EJ! Really?” Ashlyn smiled in surprise at her cousin.   
“I didn’t write that,” EJ scoffed. That figured.   
“I did,” Big Red cut in suddenly, standing up. Seb smiled at the development. That was a bit of a plot twist, but it made sense. The gingers had been attached at the hip ever since Thanksgiving. Before there was too much of a moment about that, though, Kourtney came bursting in.   
“Okay, if you guys stay in here any longer, your parents are gonna riot in the lobby,” she warned them. There were chuckles of agreement as everyone began to peel out around Seb. He stayed where he was for a moment, though, needing a second to process everything by myself. Plus, he wanted to make sure he did look presentable to go out.   
He smiled at himself in the mirror as he did up the last button on his shirt. If he hadn’t smelled like hairspray and been able to feel the glitter on his face, he could’ve convinced himself it was all a dream. There was nothing else in the world like the feeling of an amazing performance.   
Suddenly, Seb got a prickly feeling in the back of his neck that told him he wasn’t alone. He turned around in his chair to see Carlos standing in the doorway, a smirk on his face. Seb wondered how long he had been standing there.   
“Seb, I have a bone to pick with you,” Carlos huffed, stomping towards him. Seb’s smile deflated. What could he have done to upset Carlos in the last 30 minutes? The last time Seb had talked to Carlos the choreographer had kissed him on the cheek, and if Seb was being honest he was reeling just as much from that as from the huge standing ovation their cast had gotten.   
“What? Why?” Seb asked, flustered, turning back around to face the mirror. Carlos grinned wickedly, standing right behind him, their flushed faces reflected back at them.   
“That was only the most fabulous performance in East High history,” Carlos proclaimed, making Seb’s already red face go scarlet.   
“Stop it!” Seb turned around to smack at Carlos playfully,   
“It’s true,” Carlos doubled-down, placing his hands on Seb’s shoulders. The look on Carlos’s face in the mirror told Seb he absolutely believed it. There was a pause as Seb got lost in Carlos’s warm brown eyes for a moment.   
“So.. I was wondering..” Carlos broke the silence hesitantly, taking his hands off Seb’s shoulders and jumping up to sit on the counter next to Seb. “Am I gonna get to meet your family?” Seb blanched in surprise. Carlos tried to double back, misinterpreting Seb’s reaction. “I mean.. Just cause we’re like good friends now, and…” Seb cut him off, using the foam seat of the chair to step up onto the counter.   
“Carlos,” Seb breathed, sliding down the mirror to land next to the choreographer. The boys’ legs dangled off of the ledge, very close but careful not to touch. Seb didn’t know if it was the buzz of the show or if he was still holding on to his embodiment of Sharpay, but he knew what he had to say next. “I don’t want to introduce you as my friend.”   
“Oh,” Carlos failed to hide the sting on his face.  
“Wait, no, no, I’m saying this wrong!” Seb panicked, grabbing Carlos’s shoulders to turn him towards him. “I don’t want to introduce you as my friend because I kinda hoped we were more than that? I mean… cause I really like you.” Seb gasped in relief, the words he had been trying to say for months finally out in the open. Carlos’s eyes lit up with realization.   
“You don’t know how long I’ve been waiting to hear those words,” Carlos sighed. Seb grinned, hope blooming out of him, but he waited patiently for Carlos to continue. “I really like you too, Seb, like so much,” Carlos groaned. “I’m just awful with vocalizing my feelings.” He chuckled nervously, running his hand awkwardly through his hair. Double jolts assaulted Seb’s senses: both the overwhelming realization that Carlos felt the same way back and that he looked so unbearably attractive right then. For once, Carlos was the speechless one and Seb couldn’t contain himself.   
“Let’s start with this: how would you feel about being my boyfriend?” Seb took his shot, scooting closer until their legs were pressed together.   
“Like, you and I? Together? In front of all the theater families?” Carlos parodied Seb’s response from when he had asked him to homecoming. Seb rolled his eyes, but he didn’t miss a beat.   
“As far as I know, that’s how a relationship works, yes.” The boys grinned uncontrollably at each other. “So, is that a yes?” Seb asked tentatively.   
“Yes, of course, Sebby. I’m not an idiot.” Seb bit his lip to keep from screaming with relief. Carlos took Seb’s hand, resting it casually in their laps. Seb basked in the feeling of holding his boyfriend’s hand, marveling at how right that phrase felt.   
“Are you sure your parents will be cool with this?” Carlos worried. Seb nodded and gently stroked the back of Carlos’s thumb.   
“They’ll love you!” Seb assured him. “As long as, you know, you’re okay with it.”   
Carlos snorted. “Are you kidding me? Seb Matthew-Smith is my boyfriend. I want to scream it from the mountaintops!” he marveled, echoing Seb’s thoughts exactly.   
“Can I kiss you?” Seb whispered, blushing. Carlos nodded his head vigorously.   
“I think it’d be a shame if you didn’t.”   
Without a second thought, Seb grabbed Carlos’s face, placing his palms on his cheeks to bring him closer. Their lips connected like magic and Seb felt Carlos wrap his arm around him. Seb didn’t know what he did to deserve how good that kiss felt, but whatever it was it was definitely worth it.   
The boys hadn’t had nearly a long enough kiss to make up for the months of longing that had preceded it when a voice approaching from the hallway caused them to spring apart, their legs still intertwined.   
“Hey, Seb! Your family is waiting for you-” Ashlyn cut herself in the doorway when she saw the scandalized looks on the boys’ faces. She looked back and forth between them, realization dawning on her face. “Whenever you’re ready,” she added with a wink, slowly backing out of the dressing room.   
Seb blushed as Carlos leaped down from the counter, landing gracefully in front of his boyfriend. He gave Seb one last peck on the lips before offering his hand to help Seb down.   
“C’mon, we don’t want to keep your other fans waiting,” Carlos teased and Seb laughed as they made for the door hand in hand. 

Seb registered several people shouting congratulations at him as he raced down the hallway holding Carlos’s hand, an overjoyed smile overtaking his face.   
As soon as they stepped into the cafeteria, little Sophie came barrelling towards Seb, all pigtails and a crooked smile.   
“Sebby! Sebby!” she squealed, wrapping her arms around Seb’s legs. “You were funny. I liked the part where you got spaghetti on your shirt,” she giggled.   
“You’re such a goofball,” Seb cooed, ruffling her soft platinum blonde hair. He looked over at Carlos, and Sophie realized he was there. She suddenly turned shy, racing back to bury her face in Seb’s mom’s leg.   
Both boys chuckled at this as they followed her across the room to the sea of blonde heads milling near the concession table.   
“Your sister?” Carlos asked, and Seb nodded.   
“Sophie,” he grinned, dropping Carlos’s hand as they slowed down.   
“She’s adorable.” The gentle look on Carlos’s face made Seb’s heart melt.   
“I know,” Seb breathed. The crowd in front of them parted, revealing them in full view to Seb’s parents.   
“Seb!” Mrs. Matthew-Smith stepped forward, wrapping Seb in a hug and kissing him on the cheek. Seb was so thrilled from the day that he wasn’t even embarrassed that Carlos was standing right there. “You were amazing, bub! We were all blown away.” She released Seb, falling back to stand next to her husband.   
“Thank you, guys.” Seb looked over at Carlos, who stood there beaming. “I want you all to meet my boyfriend, Carlos.” Carlos took a step forward.   
If his parents were surprised, it didn’t show. Seb’s mom beamed back at them, and Seb’s dad quirked an eyebrow, but he didn’t say anything.   
“Finally!” Sarah triumphed, appearing out of nowhere. She gave Carlos a once-over, nodded once in approval, and immediately walked away. She texted with one hand and shoveled a jelly doughnut in her mouth with the other.   
Seb’s dad chuckled, placing his hand on Carlos’s shoulder. “It’s nice to meet you, Carlos. We’ve heard a lot about you.”   
Carlos’s face looked panicked as he glanced over at Seb. Seb blushed, shrugging innocently.   
“Only good things, I assure you,” Seb’s dad continued, sensing the mood. He stepped away and Carlos relaxed.   
“It’s nice to meet you too, Mr. and Mrs. Matthew-Smith,” he replied politely.  
“Please, call us Sue and Steve,” Seb’s mom requested and Carlos nodded, looking down at his feet.   
“You must be really proud of your son. He’s great. I mean, cause you’ve raised him great... I mean-” Carlos halted mid bumble, looking like he wanted to melt into the floor. Seb knew the feeling all too well. This boy’s kind words were going to be the death of him.   
“I’ll be right back,” Carlos finally finished, giving Seb a squeeze on the shoulder before heading towards the souvenir table.   
“That went well, I think,” Seb’s dad chuckled when Carlos was out of range.   
“We’re really proud of you, Seb. All of us.” Seb’s mom added. He was confused about why she had emphasized the second part until he heard a familiar voice behind him.   
“Who are you and what did you do with my brother?” Seb turned to see his older brother Scott, followed by Sabrina, approaching from the opposite direction that Carlos had gone. Scott was going to college in Provo but he must have gotten out for winter break just in time to see the show!  
“Scott!” Seb cried, flinging his arms around his older, taller, more muscular brother. “You made it!”   
“Of course! I couldn’t miss my little brother stealing the show. Although you’re not so little anymore.” Seb stepped back to look at Scott’s face and realized this was true. Last summer, he had barely reached Scott’s chest. Now, his forehead brushed the bottom of his brother’s nose. He hadn’t noticed how much he’d grown in the past few months.   
“I hear you’ve got game, too,” Scott teased, slapping Seb on the back. “What’s this about a boyfriend?” Seb flushed and gritted his teeth.   
“I’m gonna kill Sarah,” he joked, and the boys and Sabrina laughed at this.   
“This is quite a day for you, Seb,” His older sister stepped forward. “I’ve never felt prouder to be your sister.” Seb felt tears pool in his eyes. No matter how much he complained about his massive family, he really didn’t deserve any of them.   
Sabrina handed him a beautiful bouquet of roses, her eyes fixed on something behind Seb. “These are for you,” she said, “but now I’m feeling wholly inadequate.” Seb scrunched his eyebrows in confusion at this. Sabrina nodded behind him, and Seb nearly got the breath knocked out of him when he turned around.   
The bouquet in front of him was a mass of exploding colors in all the shades of the rainbow and the sweetest smell filled his nostrils. Carlos poked his head out above it, handing it to Seb.   
“Oh. My. God.” Seb squealed. “You didn’t!”   
His boyfriend blushed. “Do you like it? It’s not as big as the one Big Red got Ashlyn.”   
“Are you kidding me? They’re perfect! Thank you!” Seb couldn’t believe Carlos thought he wouldn’t like them. The two boys stood there in the middle of the cafeteria grinning like idiots at each other for far too long.   
“Hey Seb,” his mom broke in gently, tapping him on the shoulder. “We’re going to head out. Do you have a ride to and from the cast party?” Seb nodded without turning away from Carlos. “Okay,” she said, backing away. “I love you! I’ll see you later.”   
“I love you too!” Seb called, turning back quickly once to wave at his mom’s retreating figure.   
“So, what happens next?” Seb asked his boyfriend, biting his lip.   
“We par-tay!” Carlos whooped, flinging his arm around Seb’s shoulder and leading them towards the cast huddle by the exit doors. It was, without a shadow of a doubt, the best night of Seb’s life, and it was just getting started.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading all the way to the end! I can't believe that it's finally finished. It turned out to be the length of a literal novel ooooooop, but I had a lot of fun writing it. 
> 
> This made me really emotional thinking about how much I miss my theater family. Honestly, this show made my theater kid heart so happy, so I really leaned in to in this part. : )
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it! You all are amazing <3


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